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The Friday Column: Five ways my life has changed for the better since I left my religion
Posted on July 8, 2016
Screen Shot 2016-07-08 at 22.34.13Since deciding to walk away from the Jehovah’s Witness (JW) religion last year, there have been many changes to my life.
Some of these changes, like being shunned and cast aside by family and friends, have been difficult to deal with. However, when discussing what happens when you leave the Jehovah’s Witnesses, I feel it’s important to share the more positive side of the story.
Even through the emotional manipulation that the religion’s shunning policies inflict upon those who leave, there are so many ways my life is much happier and more fulfilling.
Here are five ways my life has improved since deciding to leave the religion.
I am more accepting of those different from me than I was previously.
As a Jehovah’s Witness, being friends with people who thought differently to you or had a different belief system to yours was not allowed. Those people were considered “bad associations.”
Jehovah’s Witnesses are opposed to the LGBTQ lifestyle. Due to the influence of the JW anti-gay doctrine, I frankly had an extreme prejudice bordering on hateful disgust for homosexuals. My views on the subject, though, softened somewhat when I found out a close relative was gay. However, until I left, I never fully accepted what I viewed as their “choice” of “lifestyle.”
Since leaving the religion, I have realized my views were not just incorrect, but not in alignment with the true morality of treating my fellow human beings with dignity. I now consider myself a strong supporter of universal human rights regardless of sexual orientation or gender. I also no longer view others’ sexuality as a something to judge, and I certainly don’t view homosexuality as immoral or anything to be ashamed of. In fact, I wholeheartedly accept people from all walks of life into my circle with open arms.
My thinking has also evolved on the subject of politics. Though Jehovah’s Witnesses are required to remain neutral in politics, because of the conservative nature of many doctrines, I used to identify more with the religious right side of the spectrum, and would never have been friendly toward someone identifying as a liberal. However, now that I have decided to listen to different viewpoints and judge them for myself, and not through a filter of extremist ideology, I find that I am more open to new viewpoints and have accepted some viewpoints that I previously would have derided or rejected.
Deciding to set aside religious and personal prejudice has been one of the most enlightening, enriching and satisfying things I have ever done. It has improved my life greatly by opening my world to new friends, and being able to reconnect with a family member that I never thought would forgive me for the kind of person I used to be.
I spend more time with my wife and kids than ever before.
Being a good Jehovah’s Witness requires you to sacrifice a lot of free time. Four hours of meetings a week, not counting travel time. Every Saturday morning is blocked out for field service (door-to-door preaching).
Again, the JW doctrine of avoiding “bad associations” affected activities with my children. No little league. School functions such as dances, holiday concerts, etc. are frowned upon.
Now, our family is amazingly close compared to just a year ago. We play games at home, frequently go out to eat as a family, we are active in our kids’ school lives and we encourage them to enjoy their education.
The regimented life of a Jehovah's Witness can make family happiness a rare commodity
The regimented life of a Jehovah’s Witness can make family happiness a rare commodity
My relationship with my wife is also greatly improved. We are truly best friends, and the lines of communication between us have never been more open. Being able to come home after a day at work, sit down with her and eat a meal and play a game is one of the best things in life, and we do it even more now that we have more time on our hands.
My wife and children are now paramount in my life and are my top priority. The thought that I previously gave a religion higher priority than my own family is now quite shocking to me.
I now do the right thing because it’s the right thing to do.
Many Jehovah’s Witnesses think that individuals that voluntarily leave the organization just want to live an immoral life. Many scare stories are told in meetings and publications of those that leave and become prostitutes, get involved with drugs, or become alcoholics. Though that is the case with some troubled individuals, it is the exception rather than the rule.
My moral compass has not changed. If anything, it has improved. By this, I mean that I don’t view people as second class citizens, or as if they’re beneath me for having a different viewpoint.
In short, I now do the right things for the right reasons. My motivation for doing right isn’t the desire for a divine reward of making it to paradise. It also isn’t the fear of divine retribution at Armageddon. My motivation for doing what is right is because it’s the right thing to do.
Isn’t that a more honest form of morality? What’s better: someone doing what is is because they are “keeping their eyes on the prize,” or someone doing what is right because that’s who they are on the inside, and have nothing to gain?
I no longer feel guilty for enjoying the little things in life.
I mentioned earlier how most Jehovah’s Witnesses block off Saturday mornings or weekend time for preaching. If you don’t go, the institutional guilt makes sure you don’t enjoy your weekend like you could.
I remember skipping service on Saturday, yet not wanting to go out for breakfast with my wife and kids because we were afraid of running into Jehovah’s Witnesses and having to explain why we didn’t go out in service.
Let me say, those days of fear, obligation and guilt are now behind us. Being able to sleep in on a Saturday or Sunday and go out for breakfast without the thought that you’re not “doing enough for Jehovah” is such a blissful thing.
Jehovah’s Witnesses are taught that recreation is okay, however it should always take a back seat to spiritual matters. This mentality makes it hard to enjoy the little things in life like eating out.
That JW voice in your head says, “Maybe I shouldn’t be eating out… maybe I should have donated this money I spent.” Sometimes, the voice chimes in when you skip meetings and service to go on vacation. “Other people go preaching on their vacation. Maybe I’m not a good JW because I’m skipping that.”
Our family now takes frequent trips without feeling guilty about spending time and money on ourselves. We decided to purchase Disney World annual passes this year – a pretty big purchase. Previously, we would have been wracked with guilt about spending so much money on “Satan’s system of things.”
That purchase, though, is one of the best we’ve made as a family. Being able to really enjoy oneself while doing normal family things seems like such a little thing. However, we are just discovering how fulfilling family life can be now that we don’t have a cloud of guilt hanging over our heads.
I no longer suffer from serious bouts of depression and anxiety.
Prior to leaving the organization, I suffered from many serious bouts of depression and anxiety. There is a constant, overwhelming pressure heaped on members of Jehovah’s Witnesses to do more. And if you’re not doing more, then you’re not doing enough. There is also the anxiety associated with the chance of having to make a decision someday about whether or not to let your wife and kids have a blood transfusion or die.
Jehovah’s Witnesses claim to preach a message of hope and comfort. However, the organization frequently appeals to negative emotions and highlights negative things about the world in which we live to fit their eschatology. The JW message thrives on tragedy and disasters. Every bad thing that happens in the world is highlighted, repeated and pointed to as “evidence” that their interpretation of scripture is true.
When you are raised in an environment such as this, it is easy to give in to the constant barrage of sensationalism and negativity. I never realized how negative my thinking was until I started going to therapy and ultimately separated myself from that influence.
There was something former Scientologist Sara Goldberg said in the HBO Documentary Going Clear that resonated with me. She said: “People are so indoctrinated and have been in Scientology for a really long time, or they’ve grown up in it and they don’t know anything else. So it’s scary to them to have to start all over – and it takes a really strong person to stand up to them and say ‘no.’ They say, ‘don’t go on the internet, don’t read, don’t go to these sites!’”
Sound familiar? Sara Goldberg’s comments aren’t just relevant for Scientologists. Her words apply to Jehovah’s Witnesses as well. It was not an easy thing to cut through the organization’s influence and stand up for what is right.
Once I took that step, though, I haven’t once regretted it. Now, after separating myself from that influence, I can truly say I am the happiest I have ever been. And I would also say I have never seen my wife happier.
The Best Life Ever
Jehovah’s Witnesses have spread this meme on social media and in their culture that they are living “the best life ever.” They even created an Instagram hashtag for it.
However, my experience is that it is anything but “the best life ever.” After leaving the religion, my life has truly just begun, and it is only getting better every day.
In the last year, I have done more, seen more, traveled more, thought more and loved more than I can ever remember as a Jehovah’s Witness.
For my whole life I longed to be happy – to live in a paradise and spend my days growing closer to my family and learning new things. It turns out all I had to do to get that paradise was leave behind my superstitious beliefs.
If you are a Jehovah’s Witness and are having sincere doubts about the organization, I want to tell you there IS a life beyond. You CAN be happy. And your paradise can be here and now.
By: Sean McGee
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← 21st Century Christian martyrdom: Tony Morris praises JW boy who died refusing blood
The Worst Convention Ever – Part 5: Friday →
77 Responses to The Friday Column: Five ways my life has changed for the better since I left my religion
Newer Comments →
Felipe says:
July 8, 2016 at 1:50 pm
Any and all reasons listed are worth the cruel shunning by those you once belived loved you unconditionally. Thank you Lloyd for your wonderful work to bring other people to see what you already know.
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Malachi says:
July 8, 2016 at 2:00 pm
Great article Sean. So much of what you say resonates deeply in me, most of what you describe I can honestly say I have felt and experienced as well. It is truly amazing how beautiful, clear and plain things become once you are able to remove the ‘JW goggles’ and see things from a true unbiased position. My only regret is that I didn’t see this far sooner than I did but any time is better than never.
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Summer says:
July 8, 2016 at 2:12 pm
You forgot this one::: i can wear tight pants when i want to !!!
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nullandvoidboy says:
July 8, 2016 at 4:09 pm
Hey Summer….I do almost every day! Black tight skinny jeans….It’s my uniform, and so far no one, from my previous life as a JW, has had the guts to say anything…I’m a dude….gonna be 54….in NYC…tight jean and a Motorhead tee shirt, as I walk past bethel, most weekends…hehehe
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Summer says:
July 8, 2016 at 2:14 pm
Oooh
And this one ::: i dont have to worry about being asked to take “the pill” ( referring to the mass suicide pill)
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Telescopium says:
July 9, 2016 at 9:00 pm
Summer,
If it comes down to that, they probably won’t ‘ask’.
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Big B says:
July 8, 2016 at 2:15 pm
Sean, A wonderful commentary on having Paradise Earth for you and your family now!
I can’t agree more; once the chains of cultism and indoctrination are broken then you are truly free! Free to pursue any hobby, interest or education you wish without feeling the effects of Society’s FOG (fear, obligation & guilt).
The freedom and time spent with family is well worth all the shunning they can possibly muster.
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Jullie Caron says:
July 8, 2016 at 2:27 pm
I echo your sentiments completely! We need God and Jesus…not religion and doctrines. We need to show love one another…and God is the judge! We need prayer, faith and to be obedient to his rules set out in the Bible. I haven’t been involved with JW organization for 20 yrs but have recently met people who are…and they are hypocritical…and that is how I got to this site. You don’t pick the things you wish to listen too and ignore others cause you are acting selfishly. Thanks for the well written article.
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Matias says:
July 8, 2016 at 4:32 pm
No, I think what we actually need is Thor and Zeus… Zeus is the judge! We need to be obedient and faithful to him, by respecting the rules laid out by him in the Popol Vuh
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Karen Snizek says:
July 8, 2016 at 6:22 pm
No, the flying spaghetti monster is who we need to show our obeisance to, it says so right in the Italian cookbook I have.
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Winston Smith says:
July 8, 2016 at 9:58 pm
But you can only preach the gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster while dressed as a pirate, for it is his will. LOL
WS
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Big B says:
July 9, 2016 at 8:03 am
@Matias:
I was pondering your comments and it occurred to me that the only difference between mythology and religion is this:
mythology is RELIGION that was supplanted by another belief system. Example: Greco-Roman gods dumped in favor of Judeo-Christian beliefs.
Funny, though thought provoking! 🙂
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Matias says:
July 10, 2016 at 2:21 am
@Big B you got it, congrats!
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Cedars says:
July 9, 2016 at 12:08 am
Hi Julie – thanks for commenting. However, I would appreciate if you could review our posting guidelines, including our religious neutrality rule, before posting again. You are allowed to “need” God and Jesus personally if it gives you fulfilment, but using this website to tell everyone else they need God and Jesus was not its intention.
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concerned_JW says:
July 9, 2016 at 4:55 pm
Whats wrong with people sharing their personal views? I did not take her comment in that way.
Your site has been great at exposing WT for what it is, but alot of people here have deep spiritual beliefs being bought up as a JW. This is something i thought you should truly understand since you were bought up a JW.
Alot more of the articles i read here and your videos appear somewhat of an atheistic nature, and remember that the true definition of apostate is actually someone who rejects god and christ, which this angle seems to be more prevalent here from when i first started visiting this site.
There is alot more from the bible that you need to know and as a JW myself, i know we are far from perfect, if you really took the opportunity to see things differently.
Many teachings in Christianity (including JW) are wrong and in turn make people turn away from god because it sounds like complete utter rubbish.
You make good mention on Noahs ark, etc and the key is that our own interpretation is totally wrong.
Doesnt mean that people should stop believing in god.
That is one example, but i dont have all the space to ramble on here, but as someone who was bought up as a JW, i think you should show more compassion and work from a theorcratic angle, rather than from an agnostic viewpoint.
You will get far more success, as alot of JW’s are so indoctrinated as it is, that they will just turn away before they get started.
Yes cracks are beginning to show, and more people are being awakened, but please respect our beliefs, since the site is targeted at those with a faith, it seems rather one sided at times how you let articles get published with such views.
The answers to all your doubts in the bible are there, you just need to look, i dont have the time to explain here and i wont, but please take our concerns on board. Im not the only one who has bought this up here.
The best thing you can do is get more JW’s to do their own research and question the teachings, its not as simple to just walk away from family and friends, so many of us are just pretending everything is all normal as a JW. But if less are indoctrinated with imperfect views of man, it will make things change for the better.
All the answers are in the bible and when you do your study, and find the real truth, it does set you free.
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Winston Smith says:
July 9, 2016 at 8:18 pm
@Concerned:
The issue with Julie’s comment is the fact that she says “We need God and Jesus…We need prayer” etc. She is not expressing her own personal views, but rather applying them to the entire group which can be seen as proselytizing. I personally found her phrasing a bit out of place on this site.
Cedars’ message was simply a kindly reminder in this regard. There was no strong censure or harsh criticism.
And BTW, if you watch some of Cedars’ videos, you will find that he does use scriptures to explain incorrect JW dogma.
WS
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Matias says:
July 10, 2016 at 2:45 am
It IS “complete utter rubbish”. There is about the same amount of evidence for the existence of god as there is for the existence of dwarfs, the Tooth fairy and pinocchio.
I can now hear you quoting that wasted “watchmaker” argument, then comes “the god of the gaps” chained together with several other instantiations of “the argument of ignorance”, all sprinkled with the fallacy of “appealing to emotions”.
There is a reason why all this things have a name (and a dedicated Wikipedia article for each one), they have all been considered and found to be wrong, but still people keep repeating them as if they had just came up with the idea.
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Winston Smith says:
July 10, 2016 at 10:26 am
@Matias,
You are well within your right to consider it all rubbish. On the other hand, not all of us agree with you and that is our right. I personally find the watchmaker concept to be profound and choose to accept the concept of natural theology, while rejecting revealed theology (some good wiki articles of those concepts too!). That’s, of course, my right.
The beauty of human freedom is the right to believe, disbelieve, or simply to be indifferent. The JW cult seeks to take this basic right away from its members and to decide for them.
I think that is where the balance lies with regards to this site’s guidelines: we can freey share what we think and believe – it is part of the awakening process. We just need to guard against thinking that just because we believe, someone else needs to as well. That’s the razor’s edge between voicing belief vs proselytizing in my opinion.
WS
FactsNotFiction says:
July 11, 2016 at 2:55 am
I don’t want to point out the obvious @Matias but…… Dwarfs do exist. Maybe you should look here.https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Warwick_Davis
I’ll go with you on the ‘Tooth fairy’ and ‘Pinocchio’ as being fictitious though!.
Lol. Sorry couldn’t resist that. But you’ve got to be right if you are going to makes statements like that 🙂
Man from the lions pit says:
July 10, 2016 at 8:51 am
@concerned JW
Yes Cedars evolved into kind atheist in his journey and he has a right to promote those views in his own space also set some guidelines with whatever he thinks it appropriate or beneficial for him or this community.
Now the question is what is beneficial and for whom ? If he would prefer to keep his slogan “giving a voice to silent majority” than it would be reasonable to expect that this majority is of Christian faith thus believing in God & Jesus so it’s natural that they may voice out themselves in this spirit.And this kind a automatically being in conflict with his own guidelines.
On the other hand many or if not majority of visitors here view themselves as agnostics or atheists therefore they may not welcome comments which are expression of faith or form of proselytizing.
So it’s hard to maintain balance and be fair to all.Looks like he try his best however there is always space for improvement and tolerance on both sides of camp
best wishes,
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Imgonaburn says:
July 10, 2016 at 3:13 am
I personally don’t want to be told that I ‘need’ God, Jesus, prayer and to obey what is written in the bible. I had that message rammed down my throat for 30 years as a JW and it ALWAYS made me think I wasn’t trying hard enough or I was not worthy enough.
The truth is, I don’t need any of those things. I’m much happier without them. Having people tell me otherwise just disturbs the equilibrium that took me so long to achieve.
I don’t find it offensive, just a bit OTT and irritating. I’m grateful that Cedars kindly referred to site posting guidelines re religious neutrality. Live and let live means being accepting of others whilst allowing people the freedom to choose what’s best for themselves.
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Winston Smith says:
July 10, 2016 at 10:38 am
@Imgonaburn
I agree with you 100%. The freedom to decide what we each need as individuals is our own right. It’s what makes us human. Having that right stolen from us by the JWs under threat of shunning is severely damaging to our psyche.
It sounds like we both had the same mental knee jerk reaction to phrases like “we all need Christ; we all need prayer” and so forth. The hand once burnt reacts more quickly to the flame.
WS
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Imacountrygirl says:
July 8, 2016 at 3:03 pm
Sean, What an inspiring article!
I can identify with much you say. I did lose all my siblings, I thought we would stay family forever, no matter what happened in life. Turns out I was wrong. I don’t blame them and I have forgiven them for treating me so badly. They are the ones missing out on my life, my happiness and my freedom. I feel pity for them.
One amazing thing for me was finding out I don’t have to be a “judge” anymore. What a relief it was to give that job up. I have learned about forgiveness and how much happier I am to accept people as they are and to forgive and accept myself just as I am.
I don’t feel like an outsider anymore. We used to think we were somehow superior to all the “bad people” all around us. I was surrounded by good people and it turned out I was the “bad people” I had been so afraid of.
Sean, I am so happy for you and your family, thanks for sharing that with us.
If only the ones who shun us could understand what real freedom feels like…..
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Winston Smith says:
July 9, 2016 at 4:49 am
Excellent observations. This has been my experience as well.
WS
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Chantal says:
July 9, 2016 at 6:19 pm
I had the same thought, I don’t have to “judge” anymore. I have given that over to a higher power. I actually reached that level of thought while active in the Org. And the physical and emotional relief is beyond description.
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BeenMislead says:
July 8, 2016 at 3:23 pm
Very nice article Sean! I am happy for you and your family.
I have also been happier since I stopped wasting my time and life for a man-made organization. Now if only I could get my wife ( who remains fully endocrinated ) to pull her head out of the sand and look at the facts and evidence about the Watchtower Organization life would be even better !!
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Winston Smith says:
July 9, 2016 at 4:54 am
BeenMisled,
I am in the same boat as you. I appreciate the freedom and relief that Sean writes about on a personal level, but I don’t have the family experience because my wife is still in. Lately, I see glimmers of hope, small inroads based on some of the things she says and does, but then it seems the cult personality redoubles its efforts and she goes back the other way. Maybe some day she will wake up.
WS
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Telescopium says:
July 9, 2016 at 5:48 am
BeenMisled and Winston,
I wish you both success with awakening your wives.
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Winston Smith says:
July 9, 2016 at 7:54 am
Thanks Telescopium.
WS
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Free Thinker says:
July 8, 2016 at 3:53 pm
The truth about “The Truth” will set you FREEEEE!
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Prof. James Reaugh says:
July 8, 2016 at 4:00 pm
Thank you for writing this article. Your many points resonated with me deeply.
I am glad you are finally enjoying your life & family.
Please keep up this fine writing.
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Lynaire Williams says:
July 8, 2016 at 4:00 pm
What a wonderful post and such thoughtful comments ! For myself , I long for the day when my JW can throw away her shackles and begin to see the world as I am able and as you are quickly discovering. A place of wonder and adventure, not doom and gloom.
Hidden away in our hearts, just waiting to be found, is everything we will ever need to know. Listen to it and everything falls into place quite naturally. No guilt, no conflict, no rules except from your own authority It is a gift everyone is given and it is benevolent. Sean, I am so pleased you and your family have recognised this life-sustaining pathway. Kind Regards to All.
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Shunned by JW says:
July 8, 2016 at 4:07 pm
Congratulations on your courage. Families (we are not even JWs), are bad associations. What a mix-up.
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Quendi says:
July 8, 2016 at 4:12 pm
Sean,
I enjoyed your article and am happy for the happiness that you and your family have found. One point I’d like to raise is with respect to LGBTQ people. We do not have a “lifestyle” with respect to sexuality any more than heterosexuals have. I understand that is how you once felt and that you have come to understand that words such as “choice” and “lifestyle” do not apply to human sexuality. Still, it is easy to use these words when discussing this issue. Jehovah’s Witnesses do so because of the willful and deliberate ignorance of the Governing Body. In discussing the Witness viewpoint, I would not say they are opposed to the LGBTQ lifestyle. Rather, I think it better to say that JWs have a deep dislike (if not hatred) of LGBTQ people and leave it at that.
Quendi
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Cedars says:
July 8, 2016 at 11:51 pm
Quendi – the words “choice” and “lifestyle” were put in quotation marks deliberately to suggest at the way they have been misappropriated when referring to LGBTQ people. I think everyone can grasp this, without the need for a lengthy explanation. I like the fact that we lean on the intelligence of our readers here at JWsurvey rather than spell everything out in excruciating detail, Watchtower-style. But I appreciate your observation.
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Quendi says:
July 9, 2016 at 9:50 am
Cedars,
Thanks for your remarks on this topic as I really appreciate them. I did notice the quotation marks and understood what they implied. I thought further clarification from a gay man would help.
Quendi
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Jeffreycanning says:
July 8, 2016 at 4:26 pm
Got df’d some 40 yrs ago, remember uberdub bro who stopped to help motorist fix puncture. He related story from platform and how he preached to the dude and left brochure with him. Why do I remember this insignificant thing for 40 +) yrs, because I had the feeling even then that he did it because of the borg, not out of his heart… I now don’t believe in a God but consider myself a better person and certainly much wiser… Anyhow, great article Cedars…
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Holly chu says:
July 8, 2016 at 4:29 pm
Awesome Sean, I need to read and re-read for all your delicate details. Thanks Chelsea for posting on your FB
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Jeffreycanning says:
July 8, 2016 at 4:35 pm
Sorry Sean I credited Cedars with your story… Silly me. He is probably out breakfasting somewhare… (9.30 am here in Oz…)
Love all you guys…
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KATHLEEN L NUCCIO says:
July 8, 2016 at 4:49 pm
This was great!! Thank you for being so open and honest!!
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Bad Penny says:
July 8, 2016 at 4:54 pm
Nice article Sean –
That fantastic feeling when you finally wake up – it’s like a great weight has been lifted from your shoulders!
I realised that all those years as a JW when I thought I was following Christ had indeed been burdensome, totally opposite to Jesus own words! The conclusion was obvious – they were not Christ’s true followers at all!
So good to be free from the indoctrination and lies.
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Charles Huff says:
July 8, 2016 at 5:30 pm
Way to go man.
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Telescopium says:
July 8, 2016 at 5:42 pm
Sean,
I appreciate you mentioning depression and anxiety. When I began my break from the Organization, I discovered just how stressful the life was. It was nuts! And there was no relief in sight! Endless Kingdom Ministry articles entitled: “Can You Do More?” “Are You Reaching Out” and “Can You Pioneer In April?”.
And then there’s the meeting parts, field service, obligatory personal study.
And then there’s the standing still during the flag salute (unexpected stress in my 30s at a town council meeting – brought me back to my school days) and the national anthem at ball games.
And then there’s the ever present threat of an accident and the blood issue.
And don’t forget those office birthday parties. Why can’t we go to them? Oh that’s right, because “evil spirits might attack the celebrants”. Yeah, explain that to your coworkers… but not during coffee break! That would be needless association with worldlings!
Stress, stress, and more stress!
This led to the anxiety and depression I fought with for much of my life. Only now do I realize where it originated from.
I didn’t leave to drop the stress – I left for a host of other reasons. But the relief from the stress and anxiety has been unparalleled. Many thanks for your article.
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Chantal says:
July 9, 2016 at 6:46 pm
“Can You Pioneer in April? ” “Can You Pioneer in September? ” “Can You Pioneer in December? ” No, No, & No
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Telescopium says:
July 9, 2016 at 9:04 pm
I’m detecting a pattern here…
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mamajane says:
July 8, 2016 at 5:55 pm
I think we all can identify with your story. Thanks for sharing and I’m glad you are out and free!!!
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Karen Snizek says:
July 8, 2016 at 6:28 pm
Well written. It is wonderful to hear all the positive happy things you are now able to experience with your family now Sean. I remember feeling so peaceful and free in my heart when I broke away from that cult.
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Ready 4 to Fade says:
July 8, 2016 at 8:20 pm
You articulated many of the emotional changes that I have experienced as well. Excellent work on this article, I look forward to your future work. I find it remarkable how the religion is increasingly referred to as “JW”. The website has ironically become this idolatrous slogan which is taking precedence over the name Jehovah. Strange how things have transpired over the past decade. Another 10 years and we won’t be able to recognize this religion at all.
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Big B says:
July 10, 2016 at 8:07 am
@ Ready 4 to Fade:
Great observation. Being associated back in 1957 and faded since 2012, I believe that this is definitely not the religion I came to know. And yes, in ten years it will have morphed into something else yet again. Can anyone say “NEW LIGHT”?
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Harry Cadanza says:
July 8, 2016 at 8:24 pm
Great article Sean McGee, My family shunned me for twentyone years because I wasn’t going to meetings and I celebrated Christmas and the holidays. I was considered inactive by the congregation elders and no action was taken against me by them. I missed my family so I kept remembering the good old days I had with them when I was considered apart of the family. Even though I was fully awake I decided to return to the meetings and be a good JW so I could have my JW family back in my life. What I didn’t realize is how unacceptable the JW lifestyle is for me now that I’m awake. I also didn’t realize how brainwashed and programmed I was at one time and how brainwashed JW’s are. I began visiting jwsurvey when I realized how mindless the JW religion is and how mind controlled my JW family is. Then I knew what I was getting myself into. The funny thing is being shunned was harder on me. I actually feel better now because I know I’m the one limiting contact with them. Staying away from them feels very comfortable. I had to return to learn that. I used to feel guilt and blame. I don’t feel those things at all any longer. It’s mind control at it’s worst. My JW family LITERALLY WORSHIPS the society and the G.B. when I tried to bring up the subject of the global deluge they jumped down my throat and asked me why I had to be so negative. They don’t think for themselves that’s why I say they are mindless. Even though my JW family told me I’m not welcomed, the next day I felt calm because I know I’m not interested in being around them. I have been feeling comfort and calm ever sense. I’m so glad I’ve removed myself from stress and pressure I don’t need. I have less stress in my life. The JW religion is to controlling and manipulative for me.
Reply
Man from the lions pit says:
July 8, 2016 at 8:29 pm
Thanks for your sincere article Sean !
I wish you & your family all the best on your new journey !Your happiness is my too!
It’s your exclusive right to feel what you feel now and I wish that all these feelings will stay with you for rest of your life with no regrets.
Personally I think life is much more complex and complicated because there are similar “stories” and sentiments on both sides.For instance this month broadcasting futures one of them.Many people who are becoming JW experience similar feelings.
Critics may say its just their propaganda but same may apply to your story or feelings.
So the bottom line is,the human quest for happiness is road which goes at least two ways including numerous intersections which may bring you/us to other roads.
May happiness be with you bro !
Reply
Telescopium says:
July 9, 2016 at 2:48 pm
Man from the lions pit,
You make a very interesting point. I wonder if the positive life-changing happiness that each side experiences boils down to having hope.
For a typical Witness, their hope will be realized by Jehovah, therefore they don’t need to do anything except stay in his good graces. Having their hope taken care of by someone else can be a comfort to them and make them feel secure and happy.
For a non-Witness, their hope is in mankind, of which they are a part. Therefore they can have an active share in realizing their hope, which can bring a sense of control in life, along with happiness.
Just a few thoughts.
Reply
Man from the lions pit says:
July 9, 2016 at 9:12 pm
@telescopium
yes I do agree hope is a common denominator for both groups I would add for all groups individual …hope is about our future desires,dreams,ambitions and who doesn’t wish to have good possessive outlook….?
You made valid points for JW an non JW.
But I not sure about the typical JW doing nothing.It’s a matter of perception most likely.
The typical JW wants to be and needs to be very active in order to stay in grace.(I do not mean grace of GB or ORG.)If this will be enough for God !
As somebody smart said ” happiness is not a destination but a journey” however many may consider journey as a destination and vice versa.
And than it may look like in this old saying: “Marriage is like a besiege fortress those who are in want to get out and those who are out want to get in.”
Happiness as emotion is a product of body & mind and many may feel that how you achieve it it secondary.Others may feel that actually the way how do you achieved it is matters.
So matter what is the case
we have to make our choices anyhow
and our choices = happiness or maybe not
best wishes,
Reply
Sharon Christensen says:
July 8, 2016 at 8:57 pm
Thanx for sharing your journey to happiness and freedom. It is a good feeling and a big weight that is lifted from one who finally is able to be ok with not letting this controlling orgy rule and ruin ones life…it takes time, for some longer than others…glad you and your family could experience this freedom so soon after you left. May all on their journey to freedom….soon be able to enjoy sleeping in on wknds or going out for breaky etc., or watching tv on mntg nights!!!!! 🙂 and not have the slightest feelins of guilt…and yes to love and show affection for all people no matter what, who, where…we are all God’s childern. To not dread the future, to be happy every day. Life is good without….JW.org! 🙂
Reply
Tara says:
July 8, 2016 at 9:15 pm
Great article Sean. So this may be a little tongue in cheek but here, to quote a Sound of Music song, are a few of my favourite things
1) Having a pink – well it’s sort of copperish, streak in my hair.
2) Watching all the Indiana Jones movies without feeling guilty.
3) Wearing tight fitting jeans in a provocative manner :p
4) Listening to Heavy Metal/Rock full blast in the car with windows down.
5) Walking into a yoga class wearing yoga pants – sucks to be you Tight Pants Tony.
And then I don’t feel….. sooooooo bad.
Reply
Mama Joy says:
July 8, 2016 at 9:24 pm
I can celebrate holidays just like Jesus did as a child.
Reply
Quendi says:
July 9, 2016 at 10:02 am
Mama Joy, that is one of the things I have really have come to enjoy again: the holidays. I recognize them as occasions to rejoice that I am alive, have wonderful friends and family to celebrate with and really embrace life wholeheartedly.
I don’t celebrate all of them, but the big ones like Christmas, Easter and Thanksgiving are very important to me. In addition, I have taken to observing some rather obscure ones just for the fun of it and I feel all the better as a result. So I am very glad that you are doing the same! May their observance and celebration bring even more peace, joy and love into your life!
Quendi
Reply
John Baptist says:
July 9, 2016 at 6:07 am
When one removes themselves from the unbalanced control of a cult they flourish in ways they never thought possible. The one true religion is your own personal relationship with “GOD” or whatever you choose to do.
Our Conscience is our guide, we really know if what were doing is right or wrong. Thats why so many finally end up leaving this cult because they know its just not “RIGHT”
Good luck to you and your family as you embark on this new way of life that focuses on Family as being your True Religion!!
Reply
John Baptist says:
July 9, 2016 at 6:07 am
When one removes themselves from the unbalanced control of a cult they flourish in ways they never thought possible. The one true religion is your own personal relationship with “GOD” or whatever you choose to do.
Our Conscience is our guide, we really know if what were doing is right or wrong. Thats why so many finally end up leaving this cult because they know its just not “RIGHT”
Good luck to you and your family as you embark on this new way of life that focuses on Family as being your True Religion!!
Reply
Paul Minty says:
July 9, 2016 at 9:04 am
They say the North Koreans are brainwashed. They’re not even close to jw victims. I walked away twenty-two years ago aged 46 and songs and bible verses that I heard over and over as a child still come to my lips. At aged 17 I had a car crash that has left me disabled and in daily pain. Call me slow but last week the fact that my parents were so brainwashed they would have let me die through witholding blood caught up with me. I don’t blame them they were totally brainwashed and being young and fit I made it but had a leg amputated.I have put my artificial leg on and off some74000 times since and it hurts to know things could have been different. So if you are a happy JW (unlikely) that’s up to you but please don’t knock at my door for I am a happy ‘Do not call’ Yippee
Reply
Twmack says:
July 9, 2016 at 11:37 am
Continually striving for an unreachable goal, cannot
be described as the best life ever. “What would Jesus do”?
we were to ask ourselves when making choices, be it the
type of employment, what to watch on tv, or dealing with
the myriad of awkward situations that life throws up.
We were bound to fail many times, leading to a feeling of
unworthiness, resulting in guilt and depression.
Elders were to be exemplary and to have an exemplary
family. This resulted in much strife and sorrow that still
nags at me today, trying to force two bright teenagers,
a boy and a girl to live a restrictive life, centred almost
entirely around meetings, bible study and preaching.
The pressure is piled on relentlessly, some cannot deal
with it, 6 suicides in the my former cong, does not
indicate the best life ever. /
Thanks for the fine article Sean, Doing things because
of the person we are and not for a prize, was one of
many great thoughts.
Reply
Thankful says:
July 9, 2016 at 11:41 am
Thank you so much for your article! It takes strength to do what you did and I wish you and your family peace and blessings for the future. My husband is not a JW but my in-laws are and I feel very uneasy about them. His mother joined this cult apart from her husband and 2 children. She began not celebrating birthdays, holidays, etc. when they were teenagers. My husband does not have a close relationship with his mother and his father has since passed away. I don’t think she recognizes how deleterious her actions were on their existence as a family. What I don’t understand is that she still has a relationship with her children and grand children who are not witnesses and justifies it when we are supposedly “bad associations”. She does not acknowledge that there is a reason why you feel there is something wrong about not being able to associate with your children and grandchildren who are not JW. I treat her with respect as I feel she deserves as being the mother of my husband and my elder but feel that she does not do the same for me because of her JW beliefs. She has tried to talk about that cult with my husband and even gave him a bible. I have made it clear to my husband that a house divided cannot stand and I am thankful that he has not taken on her beliefs. Again, thank you for your article and sharing your life lesson with everyone!
Reply
Fooledmeonce says:
July 9, 2016 at 3:33 pm
I think this is a great article and I agree with it 100%!
For me, leaving was hard (I don’t know if we all can compare how hard it is to each one who has left) and I find that it is slowly becoming a better life for me.
I think that my twisted parents plus being in that cult for so long has damaged me to the point where it would be difficult to feel happy. But that’s not to say that I would want one more day as a JW! I only wish that I got out sooner!
What I’m trying to say is that if anyone is contemplating leaving you might need some therapy and you will need a good support group. Some people can just walk away and feel great while others of us will have a lot to work through. Either way, run, don’t walk, out of the JWs!
Reply
Kaytee says:
July 12, 2016 at 1:27 pm
I also grew up with the combination of poor parenting and JW indoctrination. Leaving has been good, but I have been left with sometimes crippling depression. For some of us it will take many years of therapy before being completely free.
From my experience, if one is still dealing with severe anxiety and depression along with nightmares and/or flashbacks after being out awhile, there is a form of post traumatic stress disorder (c-PTSD or developmental trauma disorder) that could be the cause. Most people don’t know this condition exists. It may be worth looking into if standard treatments for anxiety/depression aren’t helping.
I’m not trying to tell anyone what to do, but it’s information that I wish I’d been given when I was suffering the most.
Reply
Harry Cadanza says:
July 10, 2016 at 12:34 am
I remember back in the 1980s during a talk the elder said, many times after a person gets reinstated he or she will fall away. I remember he said once a person falls out of the truth it’s usually hard for them to come back in. I wonder if returning and then leaving is a stage a person goes through that is actually very common. I know I did that. Once you’re away from the programming you can only tolerate limited contact with it. Even though I loved my mom and dad very much I could only stand being around them once a month because they were so indoctrinated. The good thing is I was able to be with them regularly when they ended up on hospice and I was with them when they passed away. I’m very thankful about that. I think the stages people go through while waking up are denial (at first) then bargaining, (like saying I’ll be a fake witness for my family’s sake)and then acceptance by being happy without feelings of guilt. It would be interesting if someone ever did a study on the subject. It would be interesting. It took me a year and two months before I felt good. The religion took away self confedence and caused me to feel like I was a heel. I absolutely no longer feel that way. I believe it gets better and happier for me and my mind as time passes. This website helps me a lot. I feel Loyde Evens does an excellent job at presenting the facts in a way so that all people get an honest true understanding about the JW religion.
Reply
David Brand says:
July 10, 2016 at 7:30 pm
Hi Harry I can certainly relate to the stage theory that you outlined. I did the “fake witness” thing for about a year after leaving Bethel. It was torture and I was in a state of constant internal conflict. When I finally confessed in writing to one of the elders I felt a tremendous weight lift off of me. Still, I had a huge hill to climb. Suddenly without any of my former “friends” and family in my life I feel into a state of free-fall. This was well before the Internet. Today we are indeed fortunate to have these online forums where we can share our stories and experiences, lifting each other up in the process. We can live as free, independent people! I’ve learned to find so much joy in the process of learning and discovery. I’d never want to go back to having all the answers spoon fed to me. Thank you Lloyd for your work here!
Reply
ruthlee says:
July 11, 2016 at 12:20 am
I’ve done the fake thing for way too long. This is a logical process you clearly outlined David Brand. cheers Ruthlee
Reply
Janice Gilbert says:
July 10, 2016 at 10:51 am
Mr. Cedars,
I just love, love love this site! There is so much truth to what is being said and how people are treated if they leave the organization. I have to say that I am happier now that I have left. And I am thrilled that this site exists. I had an abusive JW husband and I had a lot of run ins with so called “Christian ” friends. In the congregation, I was treated poorly by a good many. I was slandered, I was told by a sister that the reason my three and four year old daughters were molested and the courts didn’t help was that my babies weren’t “sheep”-in other words, they weren’t chosen by God. When I tried to talk to the congregation elders about the Australian Royal commission, I was told that these things were inspired by demons and that I had “bought into” the story and was snatched up by Satan. Then there was the slander from snotty, hateful sisters who set out to ruin my reputation. Someone in the congregation had gone around asking for hundreds of dollars in my name. Instead of approaching me personally, an elder had a friend tell me to stop trying to take advantage of the congregation like my ex-husband had. Unbelievable. Then, when I approached the elder and asked who it was that was saying these things, the elder would only say that a couple of people had said it and wouldn’t divulge their names so that I could confront them and defend myself. That is enough to make anyone want to leave. And leave I did! The past year has been happy and guilt free. Bye Bye to the snots who told me that my lesbian daughter was with the demons, sleeping with the demons. Bye Bye to the hypocrits whose sons would break into neighborhood garages and steal things and committed rampant fornication and they had the nerve to say that their kids were good while my daughters were condemned. Bye Bye and take your nasty baggage with you! I’m through!
Reply
Chantal says:
July 13, 2016 at 5:11 pm
Wow, Janice. I am from the US and I can say I watched 95% of the ARC’s fanastic vivisection of the WT defense. Here in the US we tried to talk to mind-controlled uncaring Elders about the goings on in Australia. To no avail whatsoever. In fact, some of us were branded apostate. So glad you got out and hopefully saved your family!
Reply
Freed Mason says:
July 11, 2016 at 12:58 am
Thank you for the great article Sean! I can echo your sentiments to the word. I have enjoyed a wonderful life and made genuine friends since leaving this organisation ten years ago. The crutches of alcohol and television, as well as mindless hours of repetitive brain washing are a distant memory, replaced with living a ‘clean life’ (diet and mentally) and a genuine interest in our local community.
As you mentioned the biggest change for me was also that I no longer seek acknowledgement or a prize for anything good that I do which is very refreshing and fulfilling.
Peace out
Reply
Vinitha says:
July 11, 2016 at 4:27 pm
Such a nice article comparing and contrasting the life as JW vs non JW. I could relate to pretty much everything. Not having the mental freedom to enjoy little things in life without guilt, always pushed to the edge to do things for JW and prejudice against non-JWs. Now life is so much better without the JW extra baggage, you just live as a free being.
Reply
James Broughton says:
July 14, 2016 at 1:03 am
Sean has given us such helpful comments that we all need to reflect on. Ruth Tucker, in her book, ‘Strange Cults’ writes; “In attempting to understand the..[JWs] it is imperative that we get to know adherents …as individuals- as people.” Sean has done that for us.
Reply
Dazi says:
July 14, 2016 at 8:58 pm
I’d love some advice. If someone was baptized after 1985 but was under the age of 18 at the time of baptism, is it still binding? Would WT legal department back off & allow a person to leave without making an announcement at the hall?
Reply
Dazi says:
July 14, 2016 at 9:06 pm
I should add- with the threat of a law suit and baptism was in USA- California.
Reply
Winston Smith says:
July 27, 2016 at 4:00 am
Check out this article on jwfacts: http://jwfacts.com/watchtower/experiences/grundy.php. It’s rare that they accept annulling your baptism on these grounds. I was baptized after 85 and was under 18, so I simply faded without any congregational action being taken.
WS
Reply
Dazi says:
July 31, 2016 at 7:54 am
Thank you for the advice/link 🙂
Reply
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← 21st Century Christian martyrdom: Tony Morris praises JW boy who died refusing blood
The Worst Convention Ever – Part 5: Friday →
The Friday Column: Five ways my life has changed for the better since I left my religion
Posted on July 8, 2016
Screen Shot 2016-07-08 at 22.34.13Since deciding to walk away from the Jehovah’s Witness (JW) religion last year, there have been many changes to my life.
Some of these changes, like being shunned and cast aside by family and friends, have been difficult to deal with. However, when discussing what happens when you leave the Jehovah’s Witnesses, I feel it’s important to share the more positive side of the story.
Even through the emotional manipulation that the religion’s shunning policies inflict upon those who leave, there are so many ways my life is much happier and more fulfilling.
Here are five ways my life has improved since deciding to leave the religion.
I am more accepting of those different from me than I was previously.
As a Jehovah’s Witness, being friends with people who thought differently to you or had a different belief system to yours was not allowed. Those people were considered “bad associations.”
Jehovah’s Witnesses are opposed to the LGBTQ lifestyle. Due to the influence of the JW anti-gay doctrine, I frankly had an extreme prejudice bordering on hateful disgust for homosexuals. My views on the subject, though, softened somewhat when I found out a close relative was gay. However, until I left, I never fully accepted what I viewed as their “choice” of “lifestyle.”
Since leaving the religion, I have realized my views were not just incorrect, but not in alignment with the true morality of treating my fellow human beings with dignity. I now consider myself a strong supporter of universal human rights regardless of sexual orientation or gender. I also no longer view others’ sexuality as a something to judge, and I certainly don’t view homosexuality as immoral or anything to be ashamed of. In fact, I wholeheartedly accept people from all walks of life into my circle with open arms.
My thinking has also evolved on the subject of politics. Though Jehovah’s Witnesses are required to remain neutral in politics, because of the conservative nature of many doctrines, I used to identify more with the religious right side of the spectrum, and would never have been friendly toward someone identifying as a liberal. However, now that I have decided to listen to different viewpoints and judge them for myself, and not through a filter of extremist ideology, I find that I am more open to new viewpoints and have accepted some viewpoints that I previously would have derided or rejected.
Deciding to set aside religious and personal prejudice has been one of the most enlightening, enriching and satisfying things I have ever done. It has improved my life greatly by opening my world to new friends, and being able to reconnect with a family member that I never thought would forgive me for the kind of person I used to be.
I spend more time with my wife and kids than ever before.
Being a good Jehovah’s Witness requires you to sacrifice a lot of free time. Four hours of meetings a week, not counting travel time. Every Saturday morning is blocked out for field service (door-to-door preaching).
Again, the JW doctrine of avoiding “bad associations” affected activities with my children. No little league. School functions such as dances, holiday concerts, etc. are frowned upon.
Now, our family is amazingly close compared to just a year ago. We play games at home, frequently go out to eat as a family, we are active in our kids’ school lives and we encourage them to enjoy their education.
The regimented life of a Jehovah's Witness can make family happiness a rare commodity
The regimented life of a Jehovah’s Witness can make family happiness a rare commodity
My relationship with my wife is also greatly improved. We are truly best friends, and the lines of communication between us have never been more open. Being able to come home after a day at work, sit down with her and eat a meal and play a game is one of the best things in life, and we do it even more now that we have more time on our hands.
My wife and children are now paramount in my life and are my top priority. The thought that I previously gave a religion higher priority than my own family is now quite shocking to me.
I now do the right thing because it’s the right thing to do.
Many Jehovah’s Witnesses think that individuals that voluntarily leave the organization just want to live an immoral life. Many scare stories are told in meetings and publications of those that leave and become prostitutes, get involved with drugs, or become alcoholics. Though that is the case with some troubled individuals, it is the exception rather than the rule.
My moral compass has not changed. If anything, it has improved. By this, I mean that I don’t view people as second class citizens, or as if they’re beneath me for having a different viewpoint.
In short, I now do the right things for the right reasons. My motivation for doing right isn’t the desire for a divine reward of making it to paradise. It also isn’t the fear of divine retribution at Armageddon. My motivation for doing what is right is because it’s the right thing to do.
Isn’t that a more honest form of morality? What’s better: someone doing what is is because they are “keeping their eyes on the prize,” or someone doing what is right because that’s who they are on the inside, and have nothing to gain?
I no longer feel guilty for enjoying the little things in life.
I mentioned earlier how most Jehovah’s Witnesses block off Saturday mornings or weekend time for preaching. If you don’t go, the institutional guilt makes sure you don’t enjoy your weekend like you could.
I remember skipping service on Saturday, yet not wanting to go out for breakfast with my wife and kids because we were afraid of running into Jehovah’s Witnesses and having to explain why we didn’t go out in service.
Let me say, those days of fear, obligation and guilt are now behind us. Being able to sleep in on a Saturday or Sunday and go out for breakfast without the thought that you’re not “doing enough for Jehovah” is such a blissful thing.
Jehovah’s Witnesses are taught that recreation is okay, however it should always take a back seat to spiritual matters. This mentality makes it hard to enjoy the little things in life like eating out.
That JW voice in your head says, “Maybe I shouldn’t be eating out… maybe I should have donated this money I spent.” Sometimes, the voice chimes in when you skip meetings and service to go on vacation. “Other people go preaching on their vacation. Maybe I’m not a good JW because I’m skipping that.”
Our family now takes frequent trips without feeling guilty about spending time and money on ourselves. We decided to purchase Disney World annual passes this year – a pretty big purchase. Previously, we would have been wracked with guilt about spending so much money on “Satan’s system of things.”
That purchase, though, is one of the best we’ve made as a family. Being able to really enjoy oneself while doing normal family things seems like such a little thing. However, we are just discovering how fulfilling family life can be now that we don’t have a cloud of guilt hanging over our heads.
I no longer suffer from serious bouts of depression and anxiety.
Prior to leaving the organization, I suffered from many serious bouts of depression and anxiety. There is a constant, overwhelming pressure heaped on members of Jehovah’s Witnesses to do more. And if you’re not doing more, then you’re not doing enough. There is also the anxiety associated with the chance of having to make a decision someday about whether or not to let your wife and kids have a blood transfusion or die.
Jehovah’s Witnesses claim to preach a message of hope and comfort. However, the organization frequently appeals to negative emotions and highlights negative things about the world in which we live to fit their eschatology. The JW message thrives on tragedy and disasters. Every bad thing that happens in the world is highlighted, repeated and pointed to as “evidence” that their interpretation of scripture is true.
When you are raised in an environment such as this, it is easy to give in to the constant barrage of sensationalism and negativity. I never realized how negative my thinking was until I started going to therapy and ultimately separated myself from that influence.
There was something former Scientologist Sara Goldberg said in the HBO Documentary Going Clear that resonated with me. She said: “People are so indoctrinated and have been in Scientology for a really long time, or they’ve grown up in it and they don’t know anything else. So it’s scary to them to have to start all over – and it takes a really strong person to stand up to them and say ‘no.’ They say, ‘don’t go on the internet, don’t read, don’t go to these sites!’”
Sound familiar? Sara Goldberg’s comments aren’t just relevant for Scientologists. Her words apply to Jehovah’s Witnesses as well. It was not an easy thing to cut through the organization’s influence and stand up for what is right.
Once I took that step, though, I haven’t once regretted it. Now, after separating myself from that influence, I can truly say I am the happiest I have ever been. And I would also say I have never seen my wife happier.
The Best Life Ever
Jehovah’s Witnesses have spread this meme on social media and in their culture that they are living “the best life ever.” They even created an Instagram hashtag for it.
However, my experience is that it is anything but “the best life ever.” After leaving the religion, my life has truly just begun, and it is only getting better every day.
In the last year, I have done more, seen more, traveled more, thought more and loved more than I can ever remember as a Jehovah’s Witness.
For my whole life I longed to be happy – to live in a paradise and spend my days growing closer to my family and learning new things. It turns out all I had to do to get that paradise was leave behind my superstitious beliefs.
If you are a Jehovah’s Witness and are having sincere doubts about the organization, I want to tell you there IS a life beyond. You CAN be happy. And your paradise can be here and now.
By: Sean McGee
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AwokenSoul says:
July 27, 2016 at 2:57 am
Im actually reading this from Disney World! Haha
Such a great article. I check back here every Friday for more content. I faded three years ago and it hasnt hurt me or my children in any discernible way. My only issue is my wife’s deep indoctrination. Her emotional investment in her god is simply too strong to reason with. Unfortunately we evolved emotions before logic. While we love each other deeply, this is a constant issue regarding the upbringing of the kids.
It seems you have your spouse support. Consider yourself fortunate.
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← The Friday Column: Five ways my life has changed for the better since I left my religion
The Friday Column: Outside the bubble →
The Worst Convention Ever – Part 5: Friday
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Posted on July 10, 2016
Part 5 of the Worst Convention Ever series shows some of the most disturbing material to-date
Part 5 of the Worst Convention Ever series shows some of the most disturbing material to-date
I don’t mind admitting it. When I decided to make a series of videos to compliment articles on JWsurvey about the “Worst Convention Ever” (the “Remain Loyal to Jehovah” 2016 regional convention) I bit off way more than I could chew.
I’m honestly not sure I would have committed to it if I’d known in advance there would be so much work involved.
The idea to do a video rebuttal series came to me after a Circuit Overseer leaked a batch of material intended for use at the convention, including 46 videos, to myself and a number of other exJW activists.
As overwhelmed as I was by the overload of digital cultish manipulation, I figured the videos could be grouped together into six parts, and thus dissected relatively easily.
But then, last month, we had an extra leak – and it changed everything. We now had three days’ worth of “official” video footage filmed at one of the conventions showing, not just the dramatization videos, but how the Governing Body wants them to be presented.
This turned everything on its head. A six-part series became a nine-part series as we scrambled to accommodate the extra material.
So, rather than being (as it was intended) a straightforward summary of the miscellaneous material not covered in the previous 4 parts, Part 5 is now arguably one of the most shocking videos in this series so far.
Why? Because it now deals with the talks given on the Friday of the program. And, well, there’s no easy way to put this: the Friday material alone proves that Watchtower has gone full-on cult, and unashamedly expects to be able to control the minds of Jehovah’s Witnesses.
Loyal in thought
Arguably nothing screams “cult” and “mind control” like a charismatic speaker emphatically urging his audience to have “tight control” over what enters their minds. In Jose Cintron Jnr,* a raven-haired bethelite with a hypnotic glair, a creepy grin and a penchant for melodrama, that is exactly what Watchtower have given us.
Despite his talk, titled “Maintain Loyalty in Thought,” being scripted for him by the Governing Body’s teaching committee (as is the case with almost all convention talks), Jose throws himself into it with gusto as though he had written every word himself.
Here is a man who has zero qualms in asking thousands to “bring their thoughts into captivity” and fill their brains only with Watchtower’s endless flow of propaganda.
Jose Cintron Jnr seems to revel in his opportunity to tell convention audiences to bring their thoughts "into captivity" to Watchtower
Jose Cintron Jnr seems to revel in telling convention audiences to bring their thoughts “into captivity” to Watchtower
The most cringe-worthy moment come when Cintron Jnr, who also makes an appearance as Sennacherib in the Hezekiah drama, deviates from his script slightly to ask his audience whether they would hesitate for a moment to dial 911 if they were to discover an intruder in their homes in the middle of the night.
The irony should be glaring to anyone who is aware that calling the police is precisely what a Witness is NOT supposed to do if they become aware of a far worse crime than breaking and entering – the sexual molestation of a child by a fellow Witness.
Don’t ask questions!
Jose’s talk was the first of a three-part symposium emphasizing the need for loyalty to Watchtower in thought, word and action. Chosen to handle the second part, dealing with loyalty in “word,” was the rather more robotic Cameron Haynes.
The main thrust of Haynes’ talk, as evidenced by the dramatization video, was to remind Witnesses not to speak against the elders. Apparently, no matter how poorly-behaved your elders are, if you have a grievance against them the last thing you should do is discuss this with others. After all, elders answer only to Watchtower, and not those they are appointed to serve.
Cameron Haynes stresses the need for Witnesses to support Watchtower teachings even when they don't understand them
Cameron Haynes stresses the need for Witnesses to support Watchtower teachings even when they don’t understand them
A more intriguing application of the need for loyalty “in word” arose in comments apparently directed at those who may question “new light,” or organizational adjustments, such as the recent scrapping of the much-loved Theocratic Ministry School (which has been replaced with a bible reading and door-to-door practice session).
Haynes admits that such changes might test the loyalty of Witnesses, but reminds them to greet these with “excitement” nonetheless. He then cites the example of the apostle Peter pledging his loyalty to Christ in John 6, when many disciples are repulsed by his teachings. This, apparently, establishes that Witnesses should support Watchtower doctrine even when they don’t understand it.
This chimes with what we have already seen with outrageous teachings such as that of the overlapping generation, which is based on an explanation that makes no logical sense. The Governing Body wants its followers to know that they don’t owe any coherent breakdown of their teachings. The role of rank and file Witnesses is to follow – not question, or even understand.
Better than life
The final talk of the Friday morning program has the telling title: “Jehovah’s Loyal Love Is Better Than Life!” The speaker used in the official convention footage, Reginald McCoy, seizes his opportunity to remind the audience that being a Jehovah’s Witness is indeed better than one’s very existence.
“Life without Jehovah’s loyal love would be meaningless and purposeless, which really doesn’t make for much of a life at all,” he says. “Jehovah’s loyal love does not change. That is why it is in fact better than life… having Jehovah’s loyal love is worth more than our own existence.”
Bear in mind: ordinary members of the public are invited to Witness conventions (at least in theory), meaning non-Witnesses are expected to stomach being told their lives are meaningless unless they pledge themselves to the organization.
Reginald McCoy admonishes his audience to view their lives as secondary to their relationship with Jehovah's organization
Reginald McCoy admonishes his audience to view their lives as secondary to their relationship with Jehovah’s organization
It’s probably worth stressing that such clearly ridiculous rhetoric comes, not from the mind of the speaker, but straight from the Governing Body – as shown from the following screen grab from the final part of the speaker’s outline…
Screen Shot 2016-07-10 at 15.19.12
Hence, even though convention audiences will assume McCoy was giving a heartfelt plea based on his own thoughts and experiences, he was in fact parroting his masters – Watchtower. And Watchtower wants Witnesses to believe their very lives come second to the privilege of being in “Jehovah’s organization.”
Feel abandoned by apostates
The Friday afternoon of the convention offers a double-whammy of cultishness with two symposiums. The first presents the 7-part Sergei video series, while the second emphasizes the need to shun disfellowshipped family members using a trilogy of videos featuring the fictitious Sonja.
In one of the videos of the Sergei series, Sergei’s friend is shown vanishing in ghost-like fashion from a congregation meeting, which is supposed to represent his turning apostate. I was intrigued to see how Brandon Harkey, again using the outline provided for him, would present this material.
xxx explains why Witnesses should take it personally when people leave their religion
Brandon Harkey explains why Witnesses should take it personally when people leave their religion
It turns out a very clever strategy is being deployed by Watchtower in further stigmatizing those, like myself, who decide to leave the organization for conscientious reasons.
Witnesses are not only supposed to fear and loath apostates like me as “mentally diseased.” They are also supposed to feel personally offended and insulted that they have been “abandoned” by their former brethren.
Harkey reads Matthew 10:35-36 where Jesus warns that a man’s enemies will be “those of his own household,” and applies the verse by saying: “Yes Jesus acknowledged here that a person’s own family, their own friends, might very well abandon them for choosing to serve Jehovah.”
Though this verse was indeed describing a scenario in which a Jewish or pagan family might expel one of their own for becoming a Christian, this has nothing to do with a Witness waking up from Watchtower indoctrination and deciding to walk.
In such a case it is the family, under orders from Watchtower, who shun the one making a conscientious stand. Far from viewing them as “enemies,” the apostate will generally continue to love his family despite the difference in beliefs, but is denied a relationship with them.
But because Watchtower recognises the manipulative value of helping Witnesses feel like victims, the verse in Matthew 10 is turned on its head. The apostate is framed as the aggressor, the one who has attacked his believing family by rejecting their faith.
Amazingly, even non-JW family friends, perhaps work colleagues or unbelieving spouses, are expected by the Governing Body to refrain from rejecting or questioning Watchtower teachings.
“Perhaps you’ve felt the abandonment that results when an unbelieving family member or friend ostracises, criticises us, ridicules us because we choose to serve Jehovah,” says Harkey, without explaining why it is incumbent on those who aren’t Witnesses to validate the beliefs of those who are.
Even current Witnesses who grow lukewarm in the face of Watchtower’s increasing cultishness, the recently-dubbed “Kevinly Class” (a nod to a character from the bunker videos), are rounded on as causes of personal anguish to devout Witnesses.
“Even within the congregation, we may at times feel a sense of abandonment perhaps by a friend who seems to withdraw from us as we’re striving to put kingdom interests first and do more for Jehovah,” bemoans Harkey.
“You turn to your friends for help, for support, as you’re striving to do more, as you’re putting spiritual goals first, but maybe you notice some seem to withdraw. Why? Well your goals, what’s most important to you, may now be somewhat different from theirs.”
Witnesses are again asked to feel affronted and attacked if those around them fail to lavish them with “support” in their quest to give everything for the organization. Such coercive rhetoric is easy to see through once you’re on the outside, but for Witnesses who are sufficiently desperate to feel oppressed and persecuted, it will work only too well – leaving countless relationships even more unsalvageable.
Martyr yourself for Watchtower
Readers of this website will already be familiar with the disturbing finale to the Sergei series, in which the main protagonist likely terminates his life for his beliefs by refusing blood. It falls to bethelite Jared Gossman to drill home Watchtower’s message that Sergei made the right choice by placing Watchtower’s interests ahead of his instinct for survival.
xxx makes it clear that Witnesses should be prepared for end their lives for the sake of their beliefs
Jared Gossman makes it clear that Witnesses should be prepared to end their lives for the sake of their beliefs
Gossman begins his talk by following the outline’s call to stigmatize as cowardly, thoughtless and selfish those who would “be disloyal to [Jehovah] in an attempt to preserve life.”
Screen Shot 2016-07-10 at 17.44.31
After reminding Witnesses of the importance of keeping their medical documents signed and up-to-date (heaven forbid they don’t get second thoughts when the time comes), Gossman urges them to make the ultimate sacrifice if called upon to do so: “How sad it would be [if] in an effort to extend our life just temporarily we sacrifice our loyalty to Jehovah and lose out on life for an eternity.”
Any Witnesses who may squirm at the idea of martyring themselves for Watchtower are urged to think happy thoughts: “Even if we did lose our life in this system we can think about the resurrection hope that we have when circumstances get difficult. We can think of ourselves experiencing the blessings Jehovah has in store – perhaps blessings we’ve told others about for many years – but we can see ourselves there enjoying them as a reward for our loyalty.”
Since it’s impossible for dead Jehovah’s Witnesses who died refusing blood to come back and confirm they were resurrected into a paradise earth, you will have to take Watchtower’s word on this.
Shun your family
It’s no longer a secret that the second Friday afternoon symposium contains some of the most potent pro-shunning propaganda we have yet seen on a JW convention program. But kudos to New Jersey elder Josh Sable for finding a way to stamp his own creativity on Watchtower’s message of hate.
xxx argues that the growth cycle of the lilac sets a precedent for JW families to shun disfellowshipped loved ones
Josh Sable argues that the growth cycle of the lilac sets a precedent for JW families to shun disfellowshipped loved ones
After the video is shown where Sonja is disfellowshipped and her mother won’t even pick up the phone when she calls, Sable comes up with a bizarre horticultural analogy to drive the point home.
“Did you know that it’s a pronounced cold snap in the dead of winter that triggers the lilac to bud and bloom come spring? Those frigid temperatures do something deep inside that plant to heighten its sweet fragrance, and to enhance the beauty of that cluster of flowers. When we look around Jehovah’s organization some of the most beautiful and sweet-smelling Christians are those who have allowed this internal process, or this chill of discipline, to make significant changes in their thinking and conduct. The result is nothing short of spectacular!”
Apparently when Jehovah’s Witnesses show love to one another, this is evidence that they are Christ’s true followers in fulfilment of his words at John 13:35. But when they treat their own flesh and blood with coldness and cruelty in obedience to their religious leaders – worry not! This can be justified due to some random plant’s growing cycle.
Inform on your brothers
It wouldn’t be a festival of Orwellian, cultish ideology without at least one incitement for the faithful to report on eachother to Big Brother should anybody fail to show loyalty to the hierarchy. Step forward bethelite Timothy Blazek to issue the necessary reminder.
xxx reminds Witnesses to inform on each other when wrongdoing is detected
Timothy Blazek reminds Witnesses to inform on each other when wrongdoing is detected
“When it comes to our friends, this might be an area that tests our loyalty – particularly when a friend gets involved in wrongdoing that should be brought to the attention of the elders,” says Blazek.
“Never would we want to allow misguided loyalty to a friend to overshadow our loyalty to Jehovah. If you recall, as we heard earlier the definition from the Greek language of loyalty carries the thought of holiness and righteousness, so what would the loving and loyal thing be to do if a friend was in such a circumstance? Approach the friend, urge him to seek the help of the elders and the parents and to speak to them. And then tell him that if he does not do it within a reasonable period of time – you will.”
Unlike Sable with his poetic lilac illustration, Blazek is here reading directly from the manuscript furnished him by the Governing Body, with only a few minor deviations.
Screen Shot 2016-07-10 at 21.21.24
Thus, immediately after the shunning symposium is ended, instructions are issued that will help add to the number of those shunned.
Not a moment’s thought is given that whatever the perceived wrongdoing is, which could be anything from sexual activity to smoking a cigarette, the punishment will almost never fit the crime.
Only in the case of a crime such as child molestation could an argument be made for family estrangement being appropriate (along with prosecution by the authorities, obviously) – but ironically elders require two witnesses to take any such accusation seriously.
By contrast, at least on the evidence of this talk, when it comes to a teenage Witness having a sexual relationship with the girl nextdoor, one snitching friend is enough to set things in motion.
Counting the cost
I’ve heard it said that there is nothing new about much of the material being pumped into the minds of Witnesses at this convention. Indeed, though I never paid as rapt attention at conventions as I was required to, I can vaguely remember frequent talks similar to those listed above.
The reason why I believe this is the “worst convention ever” is because, for the first time, the Governing Body’s hate-filled manuscripts are not deemed enough. As their video production resources have swollen in recent years, they have spotted an opportunity to enhance the already-potent propaganda at their conventions with sleek video dramatizations to make sure their message about the need for absolute obedience sinks in.
As much as I would like to think all of this cultic manipulation will drift over the heads of the majority in attendance (though in many cases, surely it will), we would be naive to think this. Jehovah’s Witnesses on the whole take their faith extremely seriously, and there will likely be real-world ramifications to the talks given at this convention.
People will start being shunned who weren’t shunned previously, and people who were hitherto mentally on the fence about blood transfusions will resolve to kill themselves by refusing blood if the opportunity presents itself, as a direct result of this convention. Make no mistake about that.
The awful videos promoting shunning, hatred of apostates and martyrdom, combined with the torrent of overt calls for unquestioned loyalty, even at the expense of one’s life, convince me we have never seen a Watchtower convention worse than this. I only wish I could say with confidence it won’t be the worst of all time.
new-cedars-signature3
Further reading:
◾Friendly Atheist coverage
◾JWsurvey articles on the “Worst Convention Ever
Translations: Romanian | …
*All name spellings of speakers have been guessed at, and may not be exact.
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189 Responses to The Worst Convention Ever – Part 5: Friday
Newer Comments →
Sardec says:
July 10, 2016 at 1:32 pm
We didn’t go because I found the one online soon enough. My husband was watching some of Friday’s session, made fun of the 911 call comment, and proceeded to shut off the video. And he’s mentally still in!
Reply
Ready 4 to Fade says:
July 12, 2016 at 6:15 pm
I found the 911comment ironic for other reasons. Here in the US at least, there is a first aid department at conventions which usually consists of a nursing home aide, a dental hygienist and two elders overseeing them at any given time. The elders are always far too busy to be in their seats with their families you know! There is typically an explicit instruction given from the platform NOT TO CALL 911 under any circumstances, but to alert the nearest ministerial servant who will be divinely inspired to save your poor old grandfather as he keels over with a massive heart attack or stroke. Obviously the “golden hour” has no meaning in the context of a regional convention. Better to let an elderly JW die or be permanently disabled than to distract from the true life-saving which is obviously already in progress on the platform. Besides, a newspaper article about someone dropping dead at the convention doesn’t attract the right type of attention.
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Chiafade says:
July 10, 2016 at 1:50 pm
“Full on cult mode”, indeed Lloyd. I gave a talk on the same symposium with Jose Cintron a couple of years ago when I was still in. He’s in the Arabic field now. He has strange mannerisms and is a HUGE brown noser. Everything out of his mouth is “the slave this and the slave that” and “the slave is really taking care of us”. Which indicates one of his biggest problems and why men like him are so useful in cult indoctrination.
Jose and his wife travel ALOT. They also receive a pretty penny on a weekly/bi weekly basis. How? Several green handshakes that amount to $500 to $1000 dollars a week, tax free! How do I know? My brother entered Brooklyn bethel at the same time as Jose. I’ve heard and seen this for myself.
He’s not the only one. Men like this say and to an extent by means of the confirmation bias they receive through green handshakes, experience”Jehovahs loving hand in my life”. Whereas the bethelites who are not charismatic and have frumpy looking wives and are generally just not that special are given the boot with zero resources to show for it. They NEED men who can influence others.
Great article Lloyd. So much content.
Reply
Grace says:
July 10, 2016 at 3:28 pm
Yuk, that man looks like a glazed eyed cultist for sure. His eyes look devious to me. He looks as though he’s acting when he gives the talk. It just doesn’t look genuine at all.
Reply
Telescopium says:
July 14, 2016 at 2:58 pm
Opinion: I think he blinks too much.
That tells me something, although I’m not quite sure what it is. Hiding something…?
Reply
Oubliette says:
July 10, 2016 at 2:27 pm
I think it’s interesting that rank & file JWs are told not to criticize the elders because the “elders answer only to Watchtower.”
After all, the WT leaders view themselves as exempt from any such accountability:
“I do not answer to Watchtower”Gerrit Lösch declaration revealed!
http://jwsurvey.org/cedars-blog/i-do-not-answer-to-watchtower-stunning-gerrit-losch-declaration-revealed
Let’s review: It’s a cult!
Reply
Winston Smith says:
July 11, 2016 at 6:27 am
That one – unquestioning obedience to elders – struck me as well. It makes me think of the concept of social contract, and the mandate that our leaders govern by and for the will of those governed. This is not the case with Watchtower. The leaders are appointed by God and therefore infallable (until they are removed that is – I guess even God makes mistakes?). Much like the kings and lords of feudal times. And the rank and file are nothing but lowly serfs. Serves to prove that the Watchtower is a top-down organization.
WS
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Big B says:
July 11, 2016 at 3:06 pm
“Much like the kings and lords of feudal times. And the rank and file are nothing but lowly serfs. Serves to prove that the Watchtower is a top-down organization”.
Winston, when the WTBTS attorney says in open court, ‘we are a hierarchy just like the Catholic Church”. Then the observation you made is crystal clear. They are following a format and a successful one at that. The Catholic church is being emulated by the Governing Body (including pedophile protection) from its cardinal system down to the way they coerce their flock (serfs) into obedience. How? Thru incorrect, twisted, Pharisaic teaching of biblical doctrines and fear, obligation and guilt…oh yes, especially FEAR.
The problem the J.W.’s are finding is this: the Catholic Church has been around a lot longer, is a lot wealthier, has 800 million adherents and will out live this ‘papist wanna be’ by years. The Catholic Church has been playing politics forever and one phone call from ‘His Holiness’ is welcomed with respect around the world. A phone call from the Governing Body of J.W’s ….not so much.
So how long will the serfs continue to chafe under the bonds of this totalitarian excuse for a religion before leaving or splitting away remains to be seen?
Reply
Deep Thought says:
July 11, 2016 at 9:59 am
“I do not answer to Watchtower”Gerrit Lösch declaration revealed!
In fact, this is a correct statement. The Watchtower answers to Gerrit Losch and the other Governing Body members.
Reply
Steve McRoberts says:
July 10, 2016 at 2:31 pm
“having Jehovah’s loyal love is worth more than our own existence.”
An amazingly absurd claim! If we don’t have existence, then not only would we be unaware of Jehovah’s love, but there would be no “us” for Jehovah to love! (His loving his memory of us does us no good at all.) Our own existence must come first, as any love that benefits us is contingent upon our existence.
It sounds like the same sort of message fanatics instill in suicide bombers.
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Big B says:
July 10, 2016 at 3:56 pm
@ Steve McRoberts:
Firstly, great article as always Lloyd.
” It sounds like the same sort of message fanatics instill in suicide bombers”. You are right on target (no pun intended) Steve. 🙂
I wouldn’t be surprised if they don’t start handing out Kool-Aid at the assemblies as a sort of drill to see who follows instructions and drinks or refuses. Then one day the Kool-Aid will be laced with poison as a shortcut to Paradise when they “wake up” in the New System.
As wacky and insane as this sounds does “Jones Town” or “Heaven’s Gate” strike a familiar note? Is there no end to the propaganda from this mind controlling, pedophile protecting, Bible thumping, self-righteous bunch of hypocrites?
Thank God my family and I left when this malarkey started, my parents sure picked the wrong denomination when they started shopping religions in the late 1950’s. Can you imagine a religion with absolutely NO holidays? That should have been a big red flag right there! All that time and treasure (gas, lodging, food, dry cleaning, shoe leather etc.) wasted, and for what? Armageddon is ‘a commin’! Anytime now, just you wait and see! Yeah, right.
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Erikius says:
July 10, 2016 at 4:30 pm
@ S. McRoberts
Good point! When it comes to philosophy and a deeper understanding of the human mind,
there is much to be desired in the Watchtower world. Their own one-dimensional rationale seems to be agreeable enough for them, even if the discrepancy is obvious. By the way, philosophy can be dangerous and a very frightening topic for Jehovah’s Witnesses.
I have on many occasions argued with them from a philosophical viewpoint and at the same time given some thoughts from C.G. Jung concerning the subconscious mind etc, Abstract subjects like these make them anxious.
Ok – my own views are a bit complex and perhaps ‘far out’ and not for this forum.
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Matias says:
July 11, 2016 at 12:38 am
Ooh look at me, look at me, my views are too complex for this forum
Just kidding 😛
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Erikius says:
July 11, 2016 at 2:17 am
@ Matias
True, complex (irrelevant) for the forum and complex for myself.
I often make a lot of confusion in trying to explain what I mean, ’far out’ as I said, and my own mind goes astray with its own contradictions. It’s not easy. 🙂
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Roman Castañeda says:
July 13, 2016 at 3:34 am
Meditating out loud helps sweep away the contradictions. Then ones thoughts are far more convincing to oneself and others
John Merriman says:
July 10, 2016 at 3:36 pm
The photos of these young corporate salesmen is sickening. Wake up you Watchtower Witnesses ! It is a business nothing more. Remain loyal to the money making publishing/video/tv company. It reeks of glorification of the chief executives (GB). IT IS A TOTAL SHAM !
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JBob says:
July 10, 2016 at 9:07 pm
LMHO You got it JM, if we were to take this 1940-50’s corporate propaganda styled film out of context and insert let’s say a video from Pennsylvania Railroad [notorious for its embezzlement and mismanagement, plus government issues, that sent it spiraling into bankruptcy] which lauded the board of directors and executives as unquestionable and requiring absolute obedience, not one employee in today’s environment would buy it. We have learned that people are people, and people are strange and crooked, sometimes. So, too, we have learned since the 1950’s and 1960’s, and especially since 1970’s, that it is best to question authority and not necessarily in our best interests to follow without question, even when the authority wraps itself in the bible and the glory of heaven.
Also, for those of you truly interested in raising lilacs with sweetly fragrant blooms I would research horticultural advice from the experts. The buds appear in the fall and fall dormant in winter, they bloom in spring. If the winter is too harsh, these plants like all flora will wither away.
Again, this ranting about loyalty is simply watching Granny Watchtower getting her sagging teat caught in the wringer again. When the numbers slump, especially after what the “leadership” (be it GB or the various corporate committees) deems “new light” or “organizational changes,” the group pounds on it chest regarding its 1914-authority-grant [moot since they cast that off last year or whenever] or browbeats the remnant r/f about straying from the _only_ source of Truth–insidiously asserting and inserting themselves into the place of the only-begotten god.
An easy insertion when one considers how the group tears down other churches and religions, governments, corporations, charities and anything else that is not “Watchtower” or supporting Watchtower endeavors.
They can run to the mountains of upstate New York, even Carmel, NY, or to the bottom of the sea, in the swamps of Florida with its gators and pythons, and even if a vast army drives them off the Internet, God’s justice–Justice–will find ’em {Amos 9:2-4}.
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KAMIL LEVI PYKA says:
July 10, 2016 at 4:40 pm
After leaving Jws it’s going to be 2 years now I have absolutely no regrets of my best decision in my life to disassociate.
The Watchtower started war and it will end in war when you fight them back in legal case and I can tell you they will loose.
The government will or already acknowledged Jehovah’s Witnesses deviding and break families and community and they will have to carry consequences.
I just want to encourage anybody who is dealing with this abuse report to authorities and fight them back. That is only answer to them.
Even my mother couldn’t explain to me to shun even inactive ones. It shows how much hate they have to anybody who did not submit of slavery to their dogmatic religion.
One day it will stop.
My mother knows if they will start on her to shun me and my sister it will have serious consequences for them in court. I think that’s the proper answer.
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Helen L. Gauthier says:
July 13, 2016 at 5:14 pm
shun me and my sister it will have serious consequences for them in court. What does that mean (CONEQUENCES/court? What does this all mean. If members don’t shun inactive/fallen away/disassociate witnesses, what will happen to them? Will they be dsf to for not obeying…..I am not clear on what all this means. please someone TY
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Harry Cadanza says:
July 10, 2016 at 4:45 pm
Lloyd Evans does an excellent job at presenting the facts in a way that helps people get a true and honest understanding about the JW religion.
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Chris Obs. says:
July 10, 2016 at 6:01 pm
Hi Lloyd,
thanks a million for your precious articles and videos about this shameful convention, we should try to suggest them to always more journalists and newspapers in order to sensitize the public opinion. I would like to tell you something I thought and maybe this could be interesting to consider: 1) Interviews to psicologist and psichiatrists commenting about some of the obvious mental manipulations could be great and shocking thing for many JWs. 2) Declaring yourself clearly as an atheist could be ok for many people like me, but could be a psicological wall for mant believers or the JWs even if they are doubting about the WTS, the bible and they are ready to reconsider everything. For some people that have grown up as a believer could be much more comfortable to know that you have some kind of spiritual belief even if this has nothing to do with a religion or a sacred text, but maybe is simply something like the impersonal God mentioned from some famous non-atheist scientists and psicologists, now I remember just Einstein and Jung. After all, several non-believer psicologists has a similar approach with the believers just to don’t create a disconnection with that person. Don’t forget that even if people change their mind about a belief or God, that mental set remains for many years, sometimes forever, unless they get a help from a good therapist. Please let me know what do you think and thanks again for everything you do.
Chris
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Cedars says:
July 10, 2016 at 11:53 pm
Thanks for your observations Chris. I am always interested in involving more professional opinions, including those of mental health professionals. However, it must be pointed out that the counselling community in general is, at present, woefully behind in understanding the cult phenomenon, taking it seriously as a means of thought reform, and implementing recovery processes. There are some working behind the scenes to fix that, but there is still a lot of work ahead. As to the question of my atheism, obviously I am not a psychologist and don’t pretend to be. I suppose when it comes to the question of whether I will be able to play a role in waking up Jehovah’s Witnesses despite being open about my atheism, the proof will have to be in the pudding. I actually feel that my lack of veneration of the bible as a sacred text gives me more freedom to criticize ALL areas of Watchtower dogma – for example, including their anti-gay teachings, which Christian evangelical exJWs tend to be less vocal about. I think there is something to be said for treating people like adults, telling it like it is, and leaning on people’s intelligence and willingness to listen to other opinions that differ from their own – which, of course, is the exact opposite approach taken by Watchtower.
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Sven says:
July 13, 2016 at 9:16 am
It doesn’t matter one iota to me if you call yourself an atheist/agnostic, or not. Since there’s no way of proving or of disproving the existence of a God/gods there’s no harm being done. Besides – true or untrue THERE IS NOTHING WE CAN DO ABOUT IT!
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dee2 says:
July 13, 2016 at 12:57 pm
If there is one good thing about the JW religion is that it has certainly proven that God does not speak to anyone or lead/direct anyone which certainly makes me wonder about God’s existence – it certainly seems to me that God is playing a game of hide and seek.
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Winston Smith says:
July 15, 2016 at 7:23 am
While I don’t believe that this was divinely inspired, I do think it is a profound thought: Acts 17:27 “He did this so they might seek God, and perhaps they might reach out and find Him, though He is not far from each one of us.”
Organized religion, and the Watchtower in particular, have made “finding God” an arduous task that you cannot do without them. When in reality, for those who chose to believe in such a deity, it should be no more difficult than opening your front door and looking at the wonders of creation.
WS
dee2 says:
July 15, 2016 at 11:14 am
WS,
The wonders of creation may be a signal to some persons that God exists, but apart from this perceived existence, does God really communicate with humans, leading them and directing them as we have been told/led to believe?
I think the Bible provides a clear unequivocal answer to this question.
The writers of the New Testament (NT) did not consider the Hebrew Canon closed or aligned with today’s 39 books. They freely cited Hebrew texts that are today considered NON-CANONICAL. The most influential of the Hebrew books was that of Enoch. It exercised a greater influence on the NT than all the other non-canonical books put together. It was eventually rejected by the Jews and subsequently Christians, yet quotations from the book of Enoch can be found in Jude and verbal echoes are found in Matthew, Luke, John, Hebrews, Thessalonians, 1 Peter and Revelation and probably in other books.
Roman Catholics claim that the Bible contains 73 canonical (authentic) books, while most Protestants accept only 66 because they reject the Apocryphal/Deuterocanonical books. The Orthodox Christians accept 76 books.
The Ethiopian church, which traces its roots to the fourth-century church, claims a Canon of some 81 books.
Several ancient biblical manuscripts include non-canonical Christian writings.
It is commonly held by Bible scholars in recent centuries that mistakes were made with the selection of books for the NT Canon.
http://www.jwstudies.com/Why_Does_WTS_Accept_Christendoms_Scriptures.pdf
The Bible is a book of contradictions, inconsistencies, discrepancies, forgeries, myths, folklore, plagiarisms, midrash on scripture, revisionist history, failed prophecies or pretending to write prophesy when the writers were actually writing old history and not prophecy, morality that is incompatible with current standards of morality and ethics, inaccuracies – it is at odds with science and archaeology and historical facts in some instances; lots of writers of the Hebrew Bible, with editors/redactors trying to make the texts appear as though there were less writers; a nationalistic/political agenda propped up by god-talk which has led to the land-grab problem in the Middle East.
Yet we are told that God directed the thoughts of the men who wrote the Bible and inspired the wording of the Bible.
As far as I can see, God may exist as you claim, but he certainly is a silent God – he does not communicate with anyone, or lead or direct anyone as we have been told/led to believe.
Regards.
Winston Smith says:
July 15, 2016 at 2:07 pm
dee2
For the most part I agree with your assessment of scripture. I also think that many of the men who wrote the Bible desired to understand the Creator and what we read is their assessment and feelings on the matter. They were, of course, limited by their knowledge (or lack thereof), their misconceptions, and even their culture. Could we call them inspired, yes, but no more so than if you or I were to right down our beliefs, or perhaps lack thereof, in a creator or a purpose to the universe.
Does God speak to anyone? Certainly not in the way we were led to believe by the JWs. But to the natural theologist, the creator speaks to us all the time through that which was created. And you don’t need a church, a prophet, or a holy book to hear it. To hear one must simply listen.
WS
Winston Smith says:
July 15, 2016 at 2:09 pm
Apologies: Should be “write down” rather than “right down”
Chris Obs. says:
July 16, 2016 at 9:16 am
I understand, adults must be treated like adults that’s sure, but blind followers of a propaganda are maybe a different talk 🙂 so sometimes it needs a huge extra effort to transmit them a concept but we all know how hard it is. I have found interesting a public talk of a psicologist about faiths, he said that the faith is like a nail that most of the people are grasped to it to feel safe or even to feel alive, if you detach that nail from the wall they will just fall down so you are not doing a favour to them, unless they really trust you, then you can help them to climb down slowly from it. Have a great day Lloyd! 🙂
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dee2 says:
July 16, 2016 at 10:24 am
Chris Obs,
You are right.
Indeed, one of the major purposes of faith is to make people feel better; it is a way of making believers feel that they have some degree of control over their lives especially in situations that are beyond their control.
Human beings have always been, and still are, at the mercy of a complex and often frightening world. It is only natural that people in such circumstances would be eager, even desperate, for a way to calm their fears and give themselves confidence, and this is what faith provides. It gives believers a connection to the highest power in the universe, the one whom they are told is on their side and will make sure everything turns out all right for them. This ability to cope has always been one of the major perceived benefits of religious belief.
Faith also helps persons to feel good about their mortality.
Given the psychological hurdles regarding faith which you have mentioned, and your concern about Lloyd being open about his atheism, perhaps this is an opportunity for you to step up to the plate and launch your own website to help the blind followers extricate themselves from the Watchtower’s propaganda?
Regards.
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dee2 says:
July 19, 2016 at 9:59 am
I find it interesting that people would have such implicit, unwavering trust in a God who doesn’t really seem to have their interest and wellbeing at heart:
According to Revelation 12:7-12, God cleansed the heavens to protect his spiritual family by sending the demons down to the earth. Now his physical family has to fight them. It was important for God to get rid of these pesky demons from heaven but then he gave them to mankind to deal with and we now have to fight them.
Why would a loving God release a plague of demons upon his creation to terrorize/torment them and wreak havoc in their lives?
Or according to the account of Job, God can just ruin people’s lives as he pleases and deliberately cause tragedy and disaster as a way of “testing” the faith of his believers, even though by definition he knows what the results of the test will be ahead of time.
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Telescopium says:
July 19, 2016 at 12:36 pm
Dee2,
My wife and I were just talking about these types of injustice. We came up with:
All mankind being held responsible for Adam & Eve’s sin.
Humans being assaulted by the Nephilim, leading to a flood that kills attackers and victims alike.
Job’s life was protected, but his kids’ lives weren’t.
Job’s successful completion of the test didn’t put the issue to rest. Satan continued to victimize countless other humans.
All women must learn in silence because Eve was deceived. (Never understood this, as Adam was not deceived and therefore more culpable, right?)
The anointed are supposedly already judged righteous before they die (1 Tim. 4:8) but the great crowd must prove themselves through a horrific event called the Great Tribulation. Poor Kevin.
And then there’s a final-final test after one thousand years, at which point everyone ‘finally’ found faithful will still have to face a mob of well-dressed, bandana-wearing, stick-wielding haters. (The new reality show: “When Bethelites Attack”)
Speaking frankly, it seems there is great effort put forth to make humans VERY insecure about their prospects for a happy, endless future. Zephaniah 2:3 even says “Probably YOU may be concealed in the day of Jehovah’s anger.”
Winston Smith says:
July 19, 2016 at 4:31 pm
@Telescopium
“well-dressed, bandana-wearing, stick-wielding haters.”
I remember that picture – was it in the Revelation Book? What does God have against bandanas? By today’s standards, that would convey the concept that God is somehow against cancer patients.
WS
dee2 says:
July 19, 2016 at 4:43 pm
LOL Telescopium, you’re way too funny ☺:
“The new reality show: “When Bethelites Attack” “.
Always wondered who those people in Revelation 20:9 would be who would “surround the camp of the holy ones”………..now I know…….lol.
Caroline says:
July 10, 2016 at 6:34 pm
I watched your video two times Lloyd and I had to laugh both times over the “Laxafaith” and both times I had to laugh with the voice over with Jose Cintron Jnr. screaming “Jehovah” during his talk.
I think those clips you showed of him during that talk, make him seem really devil-like in the way he looks and talks and acts.
It is very obvious to me, that he is a wannabe actor and thinks he is so good-looking, that if he just hadn’t been born a JW, he could have made it in Hollywood but the next best thing as a JW, is being an actor for the Society’s talks and dramas.
Sad little person, that guy is, wanting to be famous and being stuck in a stupid little cult that nobody gives a crap about.
The talks are so scripted that it makes me wonder why would anybody even have to go to the assemblies? Why not just print them out to save the Witnesses the bother and expense? They do it to make money off of them with their donations and just to make sure that all the Witnesses get the point of shunning, they are forced to go to the assemblies and sit through hours and hours of the most boring talks anybody could possibly have to endure.
If
witnesses don’t show up at the assembly, they are made to explain it to everybody when they ask if they got there and they didn’t see them and unless they have a death in the immediate family, no excuse is good enough for them so Witnesses have to go or they are looked at with suspicion and the gossip starts.
Lloyd, you are a very talented guy and an excellent writer. Thank you so much for all your hard work and those who have helped you with your articles and videos. This video in particular made me laugh out loud and we need to laugh sometimes.
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Ex-Pionner says:
July 12, 2016 at 10:58 am
Caroline,
Jose Cintron’s glazed eyes are really disturbing! However, it is important to remember he is also a victim and deluded as much as his GB leaders.
I lived in the Brazilian Bethel branch and met several young men like Jose. The environment at Bethel gives such young men an opportunity to shine in their small communities and congregations. They are often perceived as “celebrities” and a some of them enjoy a few perks because of their position such as free boarding when they travel or even airline tickets to travel abroad.
I met so many talented people that gave up on their dreams to pursue a life as a bethelite. A significant amount of them were young talented men from lower income families who felt privileged to live in a beautiful place such as the branch and get their “15 minutes” of fame when they were invited to represent Bethel at special occasions.
Lloyd would have a lot to write about the psychological factors that usually draw such individuals to the organization.
I was one of them. My desire to explore the world and travel abroad made me dream about attending Gilead. Others excelled in public speaking to get the attention of sisters or to be invited to the homes of rich Witnesses.
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Grace says:
July 12, 2016 at 2:49 pm
Ex-Pioneer,
That would be an interesting subject to explore.
Maybe you could offer an article to be submitted to the website.
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Tara says:
July 10, 2016 at 6:44 pm
Praise the lord and pass the Kool aid.
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Older and Wiser says:
July 13, 2016 at 1:19 pm
No Tara – it’s Praise Jehovah and pass the Kool aid.
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C says:
July 13, 2016 at 5:29 pm
Yes, we must put Jehovah above all
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dee2 says:
July 13, 2016 at 9:53 pm
“We must put Jehovah above all………….except the Flying Spaghetti Monster (Parmesan be upon him) of course!”
– 2 Spaghettios 8:15
Prayer of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster (Parmesan be upon him):
“Our pasta,
Who art in strainer,
Whole wheat be thy grain.
Al-Dente done,
Thy sauce be yum,
At home, for dinner at seven.
Give us some wine,
Some garlic bread.
And forgive us our slurping,
As we forgive those,
Who talk with their mouths full.
And lead us not into overdone-ness
But deliver us from mush.
For Thine is the meatball,
The sauce and the pasta,
Forever and ever,
RAmen.
These are the words of His Noodleyness, may His meatballs ever be saucy.”
—The New Colander 4:20
“He Boiled For Your Sins.”
– The Book of Fettuccine 7:16
“And so it was at the last supper that he took a piece of Asian Noodle and said “this is my noodle broken for you take and boil it”. In the same manner he took a jar of Ragu “this is my sauce spilled for you, for when you consume this noodle along with this sauce you are forgiven”. ”
– Ragu 9:11
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Winston Smith says:
July 15, 2016 at 7:37 am
Love it! When I was in college (yes, college – naughty little Jdub that I was) some religious club on campus (not JWs of course) tried to have some sort of Jesus rally in the campus commons. They were there spouting of gospel when some other student positioned himself about 20 feet away (6 meters for those outside the US) and started reading aloud from the gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. It was hilarious!
WS
dee2 says:
July 13, 2016 at 9:55 pm
ಠ_ಠ
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dee2 says:
July 14, 2016 at 8:36 am
“Verily, verily, I say unto thee, though shalt have no other God but the Flying Spaghetti Monster.
Our almighty Monster is all things to all people”.
– Acts of the Apastasles 3:15 – 17
ಠ_ಠ
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Tara says:
July 14, 2016 at 7:16 pm
Mea culpa, mea culpa, mea maxima culpa….. flagellates ones self… but not too hard, it is summer after all.
Stumpy says:
July 10, 2016 at 7:36 pm
This is the beginning of the Kevin Class:
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JBob says:
July 10, 2016 at 8:44 pm
Phenomenal…
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Chiafade says:
July 10, 2016 at 9:16 pm
Awesome, thanks for posting this.
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Michael B says:
July 10, 2016 at 11:18 pm
To borrow your expression, nothing screams ‘cult’ more than the need to use heavily coded words when simpler and more accurate words would suffice. Understandings, for example, are never changed; rather, everything is ‘adjusted’.
Oh, and ‘complement’ rather than compliment in the first paragraph (I think it was.)
Given the number of videos – and their length – I can understand the effort that goes into producing these. I’m sure there is plenty of acknowledgement from others but I’ll just add again that it’s much appreciated and I for one admire the work you put into ensuring the Watchtower is held to account for what it does.
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ruthlee says:
July 11, 2016 at 12:38 am
Thanks Cedars for yet another public service and saving us the bother of attending this year’s drivel. I have wondered if mankind in it’s growingup and progress needed cults for some herding reason. But now we are fully in the information age they are at the end of their usefulness. watchtower as always slow on the uptake maybe one of the last cults standing. Cheers Ruthlee
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Willows says:
July 11, 2016 at 2:02 am
Who was it that said… Do unto others as you want them to do to you?
The speaker was calling into focus the need to treat people with respect, and continue a dialogue.
After all if we call into focus sin, who is without sin? The speaker would not have had dialogues with people if sin was a problem!
On the other hand reasonable dialogues with people can
make a difference as his example showed about how people should be treated.
Many responded to his reason and benefited.
The Watchtower would do well to follow his example. And stop trying to take out the speck in the eye of others when they have a rafter in their own eye. First take out the rafter then will be able to help remove the speck.
Unfortunately the Watchtower has a myriad of problems.
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Big B says:
July 11, 2016 at 3:26 pm
@ Willows:
“Unfortunately the Watchtower has a myriad of problems”.
Truly, an understatement however, I agree with you.
For example: joining the U.N. for ten years while at the same time denouncing the World Council of Churches for their support of the same organization is the height of hypocrisy!
Saying that they do not suffer pedophiles in their congregations yet do everything to cover up information that the authorities need in investigation by non-reporting is nothing less than criminal. Not only are pedophiles free to roam in the congregations unabated but also their communities are vulnerable to their perversions.
To any and all J.W.’s reading this a heartfelt message from me to you: GET OUT NOW or be prepared to be disappointed, disgusted, disillusioned, discouraged followed by your death believing in an unfulfilled delusional dream of a perfect Paradise earth that no one will ever live to see.
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Sarah says:
July 11, 2016 at 2:50 am
Thanks Lloyd. Of primary importance is the need to think. It’s in Proverbs – develop thinking ability, understanding, discernment etc. DO NOT accept any teaching from WT without checking it. If you don’t understand it, then there’s something wrong with it. In Acts it says people checked what the apostles told them to make sure it was so, and they were commended for doing so.
Christians only shunned those who were wicked. If we automatically assume someone is wicked because they leave the organisation we become judges, which we are told not to do. I left, I should know.
As for reporting someone, the advice should be to make sure first you’ve got it right. Check, check and check again. Reporting someone and getting it wrong is slander. Again we are told not to judge. Christians assume their friends are doing the right thing. Otherwise you get a totalitarian empire. No-one should be in fear that their actions will be misinterpreted.
If the fruitage of a religion is fear, slander and abused children then the religion is wrong. Elders who disfellowshipped Ray Franz acted ‘according to procedure’. Then the procedure must be wrong.
I suspect one reason for abolishing the Ministry School is to keep women off the platform.
I really hope GB spies read this. Thanks Lloyd.
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JBob says:
July 13, 2016 at 11:17 pm
The assumption is that persons leave because they’re seeking freedom “to sin without judgement.” After all, this is THE Light, so only a sinner would leave to darkness.
The rules of operation assumed by this convention are that individuals will remain under the limited access to information that clouded judgement for the century prior to the Internet. Thus, it’s appeal to loyalty comes from a heavy-handed punish-those-who-are-“traitors”-to-the-Cause rather than an attempt to address issues creating questions, or lacking an attempt to validate doctrinal points.
Even the leadership seems lacking in ‘deep thought’ to create a well-documented argument or thesis presenting articles of faith. Normally, a thesis presents the assertions, then also examines counter arguments point-by-point to refute those. No allegations from so-called “opposition” are examined in these convention speeches.
Also, we can tell by the facial ticks and inflections of voice that the delivery is meant to “shame” those still subject to influence into submission. The philosophical argument fallacy of emotional appeal rather than reason.
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Idontknowhatodo says:
July 11, 2016 at 3:46 am
What an amazing presentation!…timely for me…anyone who has been following me knows I have been fading for a few years and am now inactive….I have spent my time quietly leaving because I have a husband …born in to the cult like me…. who is totally commited to JWs…my children though grown and married living away from home are also totally commited and I think would shun me….I love my husband so much and he loves me but disassociation would inevitably lead to a coldness in our relationship that Im not sure I could bear….however I have now recently been diagnosed with stage 2 breast cancer and there we have it…the issue of blood transfusion rears its head…my husband wants the HLC involved…I have spoken to my consultant and said I want the issue of blood transfusion only discussed with me…my hisband wants me to get an HLC pack and fill a form out and wants to sit in on my next discussion with my Oncologist…I dont think my husband will like what he hears…and I dont think he will be able to stop himself reporting me..so in the midst of this health dilemma…with an extremely operable cancer…I may be cut off from the humans I love the most…my children and enter the coldness of a marriage to a lovely man whom I love..but who loves JW.org more than me…please any advice would be helpful…my next consultation is looming large and I dont know if my husband will take no for an amswer.
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Caroline says:
July 11, 2016 at 4:34 am
@Idontknowhattodo. Are you getting Chemo therapy? Chemo destroys red blood cells but there are shots Witnesses can take but I would do exactly as you are doing. It should be between you and your doctors what you do. Witnesses bring in the HLC because they think the HLC has the answer for getting the same results without blood and they don’t know anymore about what to do in those situations than anybody else does.
The Society likes the Witnesses to think that no matter how bad the situation is, if you put your trust in Jehovah, then you will survive the operation but it’s simply a blind trust because the Society will never release how many people have actually died from not getting the right medical treatment.
Witnesses will take the blood fractions but they are denied from donating blood and that is unbelievably hypocritical to say the least. If it’s wrong to take whole blood, then taking fractions should also be wrong. They come from the same source. You can put manure into a juice extractor and extract all the fluid, but would you drink it?
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Ready 4 to Fade says:
July 12, 2016 at 11:07 am
The “shot” is called Procrit or Epogen Alpha and actually can increase risk of some cancers, a fact that Watchtower never highlights surprise, surprise. An oncologist/hematologist is called in to weigh the risk-benefit ratio any time it is ordered and has to sign off an official document in our hospital stating why it is being used. Most healthcare organizations have social workers on staff 24/7 and I would encourage you to call on them for support in establishing help outside your immediate family now in the case that you become abandoned in your time of need. My heart goes out to you.
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Idontknowhatodo says:
July 15, 2016 at 7:15 am
Thanl you…good practical advice..have contactd outside agencies and surgeon has said his team will respect my wishes…again thank you.
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VictorE says:
July 11, 2016 at 5:12 am
VictorE
When a friend gets sick with something serious I tell them to get a second opinion. When they get cancer I tell them to check out http://WWW.cancertutor.com for information.
It saved my life and so far, everyone with cancer that I referred it to has been cured. When I tried to tell elders who had cancer or wives with cancer, they didn’t want to here it because it didn’t come from Watchtower. They really don’t have much interest in being overly concerned about one’s health except if you take blood to save your life. They have paradise where all will be cured. Their arrogance really prevents them from investigating anything that doesn’t come from Watchtower. Perhaps this is this a result of the hospital committees. They want nothing to do with this kind of information. I’ve quite trying to tell them because they make me feel that I’m almost apostate just giving people in need this information. Maybe those who have left W. will benefit more.
Hope this helps!
By the way, just heard from a long time elder and previous circuit overseer that the Society is disbanding many congregations for no good reason and selling their halls and keeping the money. Members of these congregations are all saying the same thing, that the Society is lying to them and stealing their money. The awaking is going to happen much faster than I first thought. When current elders are now calling the Society liars and thieves, it’s getting pretty serious and W. won’t be able to hide their filth much longer. Donations from these will go down drastically. The light sure is getting brighter is it not?
This site has surely shined a great big light on Watchtower and is helping a lot of people. Keep up the good work.
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Bright Lightbulb says:
July 11, 2016 at 3:20 pm
If this really is true it could be likened to any corporation who is closing down locations who are not profitable, or profitable enough.
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Big B says:
July 11, 2016 at 5:06 pm
Hallelujah! I hope this is true.
Soon the J.W.’s will be meeting in one central location like a circuit assembly hall with fire sales on all Kingdom Halls! Several congregations merged into one 500 member church.
Yes, they are selling their doctrines but no one is buying! With older ones dying out no one is replacing them. Younger generations and others are leaving in droves and attendance at yearly Memorials verify this.
That is why the halls are being “cookie cutter” constructed so they can be easily converted to doctors offices, clap clinics, abortion clinics or Catholic charity offices. 🙂
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dee2 says:
July 12, 2016 at 7:11 am
Sign of the times – Kingdom Halls for sale in Jamaica as well:
“Jehovah’s Witnesses’ Properties For Sale – Rising Costs Force Religious Group To Go Small”
http://jamaicagleaner.com/article/news/20160410/jehovahs-witnesses-properties-sale-rising-costs-force-religious-group-go-small
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Winston Smith says:
July 13, 2016 at 8:26 pm
Contributions are down because they have encouraged all of their members to pursue careers as window washers and other careers that don’t require any advanced education.
As funds continue to dry up, it will be interesting to see if there is new light about higher education, where it starts to be encouraged. I doubt it of course. Far be it from the GB to be practical – I think they may actually believe in the snake oil they sell. Also, it’s sort of a double whammy: the more people are educated the better they can sharpen their critical thinking skills and see through the lies.
WS
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Big B says:
July 14, 2016 at 7:02 am
@ Winston Smith;
Exactly, talk about a ‘Catch 22’ (a dilemma or difficult circumstance from which there is no escape because of mutually conflicting or dependent conditions).
Should the G.B. encourage higher education with the chance of higher salaries among members thus speculation of greater contributions or would that chance result in the losing of more adherents due to their gaining critical thinking skills?
The ‘faithful and discrete slave’, if they had the TRUTH, should release its hold on the r & f and let the chips fall where they may.
However, this scenario would be impossible as they are a CULT, allowing the friends have a choice in their secular lives would be an anathema to them.
Rose Graziano says:
July 14, 2016 at 9:06 am
There is a new video entitled “We lead a simple life” that was played a couple of weeks ago at the mid week meeting. This video depicts a young JW couple who are working full time jobs and making good money. They are portrayed as being bogged down and stressed out. They proceed to quit their jobs and start a small window washing business. They also sell their home and move into an apartment. This scenario is very similar to the one that is depicted in the bunker video. Now more than ever this is being “encouraged”. The GB obviously has learned nothing from the past by continuing to promote such lunacy. The older generations in the “truth” have nothing to show for all the sacrifices they have made. They have no retirement savings and because they sold their homes they have no nest egg of equity to live off of. They are broke!! What a disgrace….
JBob says:
July 13, 2016 at 11:40 pm
The Watchtower is a big thief because most Kingdom Halls were built using local funds and a “loan” from Watchtower. But those “loans” were raised by donations from the same r/f. Prior to the 1980’s building funds drive, local congregations often got a Kingdom Hall through generosity of a local r/f member donating land and then raising funds to construct. So, the Watchtower used arson to burn down those facilities throughout the 1990’s to force congregations into the new mode of buildings. Then as we are hearing now, it seized title throughout the 2000’s.
Last year I believe, as Cedars documented, the Watchtower laid down “giving requirements” for funds from each congregation every month. Failure to meet those requirements is leading to disbanding congregations as “non-profitable” or “unsustainable”. Ultimately, many outlying congregations which were convenient locations are closing and forcing members to commute greater distances.
And, all those donations of time, and labor–remember the quick-builds are based on regional building committees (placating offices and posts used as “awards” and “rewards”)–treated as nothing. This is a continual pattern for the Watchtower over the years, even with HQ staff.
HQ staffers were expected to subjugate their sexual needs and natural desire for children in the “old days” but then suddenly the leader marries. A lot of older staffers were dismayed especially when told “who told you to listen to a man?” Today, it is very much the same, you are told (encouraged) to abandon pursuit of personal goals and education, and if you do not, the group is encouraged to pummel and bully you. Yet, in the height of stupidity, the leadership often polls for expertise requiring advanced learning and training in specialized fields.
In fact, elders and middle leaders are encouraged to target those specialists for recruitment into the group with enormous leniency and boundaries which creates an elite spectrum of individuals that the HQ fawns over and lavishes admiration to encourage the individuals to donate their “gifts” and talents.
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QuietObserver says:
July 11, 2016 at 5:46 am
Idontknowhatodo, so sorry to hear you have gotten cancer. It truly is a wicked disease. But the first thing I would suggest to you is DO NOT let the HLC get involved. They only thing they do now is monitor you to make sure you do not take any blood products that are not first run past them. They are NOT there for your comfort or to support you and your husband, but are there in the capacity of policemen. My hubby and I are good friends with a brother who used to be on the HLC where my hubby grew up, and his advice is to not let them get involved with your case at all. If you know personally one of the men on the HLC, possibly you could suggest to your husband that this particular Elder makes you very uncomfortable and you don’t want him knowing your personal situation. Stand firm and don’t let them push you. My heart goes out to you! As to suggestions, when we were dealing with cancer, we followed the suggestions of a NaturoPath and a dietician who were versed in handling cancer. You may have to ask around at the hospital (ask the nurses and office staff) if they know of someone you could go see. Be strong! You can beat it!
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dee2 says:
July 11, 2016 at 9:55 am
Hi Idontknowhatodo,
Sorry to hear about your diagnosis. Do hope you will be able to beat it though.
You may find the following website to be helpful as you discuss your treatment options with your doctor and husband – this website provides info about transfusions, transfusion alternatives, transfusion reactions etc.:
http://transfusionontario.org/en/cmdownloads/categories/bloody_easy/
(Homepage: http://transfusionontario.org/en/ )
The suggestion to assess/modify your diet seems to have some merit to it as I have heard about persons who have done this and it has contributed to their cure.
There may be a support group which you may be able to join either online or in person.
Best wishes.
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dee2 says:
July 11, 2016 at 4:48 pm
Idontknowhatodo:
Sadly, when people are indoctrinated, they will only listen to what the GB says. Nevertheless, in the event of a transfusion, you could perhaps try to bolster your position by using the following arguments if you find them useful:
The “abstain from blood” command in Acts 15 was based on the Mosaic Law****** and the Mosaic Law had nothing to do with blood transfusions:
The Law stated that blood was not to be eaten which was with regard to the blood from DEAD animals, not from humans (Genesis 9:4, Leviticus 7:26; 17:10, 12-14; 19:26, Leviticus 7:26-27); blood must be poured out onto earth, in reference to DEAD animals not humans (Deuteronomy 12:16, 23, 24).
So the law was not concerned with blood coming out of a living person or animal. The bible talked about the blood of an animal AFTER it was sacrificed, AFTER it was dead.
As far as I know, it is for these reasons that the Jews, who are descendants of the writers of the Hebrew scriptures, and who adhere solely to the Hebrew scriptures, do not ban blood transfusions as a religious rite.
In any event, when a person donates blood to be used in a transfusion, they are alive not dead. Their life has not been taken away as in the case of the animal that was sacrificed.
Further, even when meat is properly drained, there is still some blood in the meat, so anyone who eats meat, also eats blood. So it’s not possible to not eat blood as per the Mosaic Law if you are a meat eater. The reason why meat is a source of iron is because of the residual blood in it, which is why persons (including JWs) eat meat as a source of iron. It certainly is odd that you can eat meat as a source of iron because of the blood in it, but can’t get a needed blood transfusion.
_______
******The command at Acts 15:28 was based on the ceremonial and moral obligations of the Mosaic Law. The Council at Jerusalem had issued a formal resolution counselling Christians to “abstain from meats offered to idols and from blood, and from things strangled, and from formication” because they had treated the ceremonial and moral obligations of Moses as of equal force.
Proof that the Mosaic Law is the basis for these commands, can be seen when the apostle Paul quietly, though without referring to it, set this resolution of the Council at Jerusalem one side, and, having vigorously condemned the fornicator, radically declares that meat is not polluted because the animal from which it is taken had first been sacrificed in a pagan temple – 1 Corinthians 10:25.
Paul’s radical response at 1 Corinthians 10:25 had to do with the issue of the Jews who thought that, by eating meat which had once been offered to idols, they participated in the idolatrous worship; and the Jewish Christians held the same view. The Gentile Christians, on the other hand, saw no harm in buying and eating such meat as they had always been accustomed to do.
Incidentally, there was actually an irreparable gulf between Paul and the Jerusalem Church as Paul was teaching his Gentile converts that with the advent and mission of Jesus, there was no longer a requirement to observe Jewish practices such as their dietary constraints whereas men from Jerusalem were telling Paul’s Gentile converts that they had to follow the Laws set down by Moses. These men were teaching that as followers of Jesus, Paul’s Gentile converts had to be Jews:http://www.jwstudies.com/The_Watchtower_s_Achilles_Heel.pdf
Best wishes.
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dee2 says:
July 12, 2016 at 11:17 am
Above link seems to be broken. Correct link:
http://www.jwstudies.com/The_Watchtower_s_Achilles__Heel.pdf
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dee2 says:
July 12, 2016 at 11:23 am
Also of interest:
– “The Watchtower’s Achilles’ Heel”:http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/topic/266009/watchtowers-achilles-heel?page=1
– “The Watchtowers Handling of Blood”:http://www.jwstudies.com/The_Watchtowers_Handling_of_Blood_Revision_2.pdf
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Winston Smith says:
July 13, 2016 at 8:16 pm
Not sure where you live, but in the US we have HIPPA laws that protect the privacy of patients. Any information about your treatment is between you and your doctors and cannot be shared with anyone without your explicit permission. So you can stipulate that under no circumstances are doctors to discuss your treatment with church elders or clergyman. It may mean that you have to keep your husband in the dark about some of your treatment. I am sure they have similar laws in other developed lands.
WS
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fallingangel75 says:
July 14, 2016 at 7:21 am
@idontknowhatodo, my heart goes out to you. My mother died from breast cancer, thankfully not due to any issues with refusing blood transfusions or opting for bloodless surgery.
I am approaching the age she was when diagnosed, within 5 years, and so far I am cancer free, but my sister also died from cancer and several aunts also had it but survived.
So, it definitely looms large in my mind that this is a challenge I might face, and an illness that may take my life.
It would be hard on my marriage regardless, but even more so now that we are religiously and ideologically divided.
I truly can imagine what it would be like to be in your shoes. And I am so sad for you. My heart breaks to hear this.
I don’t really have any useful advice other than to say: it’s your life and your body and as much as you love your husband and may have relied on him until now and/or may want to rely on him through this ordeal, you may not be able to and the stakes are just too high.
Most communities and hospital systems do have support groups. Anything you can become a part of that is comprised of health care workers and volunteers and mental health professionals, join. Join now.
You will need people who have more experience than you dealing with this. But always do what you think is best for your physical, emotional and mental well-being regardless of what your family members say.
And create a support system from secular sources so you don’t have to face this alone.
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Idontknowhatodo says:
July 15, 2016 at 7:20 am
Thank you…you are right…Im standing on my own 2 feet… its a good feeling…grown up at last.
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SIRIUS says:
July 11, 2016 at 6:11 am
I wonder what effect this will have on practicing JWs in Russia if and when this law is passed?
Russia’s Newest Law: No Evangelizing Outside of Church
…Christians in Russia won’t be allowed to email their friends an invitation to church or to evangelize in their own homes if Russia’s newest set of surveillance and anti-terrorism laws are enacted.
The proposed laws, considered the country’s most restrictive measures in post-Soviet history, place broad limitations on missionary work, including preaching, teaching, and engaging in any activity designed to recruit people into a religious group.
To share their faith, citizens must secure a government permit through a registered religious organization, and they cannot evangelize anywhere besides churches and other religious sites. The restrictions even apply to activity in private residences and online….
in part & credit to http://www.christianitytoday.com/gleanings/2016/june/no-evangelizing-outside-of-church-russia-proposes.html
Interesting view that religious recruiting could be viewed as proselytism an anti-government action.
IMHO
dogstar
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Harry Cadanza says:
July 11, 2016 at 7:12 am
Personally I don’t want to ban them but I want to see changes. If you want you can read more about this in some online newspapers. http://www.themoscowtimes.com July 26, 2015. explains Russia is a monolithic culture by repressing religious minorities. Also if you want you can read wwwthewashingtonpost.com November 23, 2015 issue it’s title reads, sixteen Jehovah’s Witnesses on trial in Russia as extremists. The sadest newspaper article online about this is at http://www.independent.co.uk December 1 2015 being one of Jehovah’s Witnesses is a six year prison sentence in Russia as extremests. The couple in the news article are elderly. They’re a married couple and their names are Alexei and Lyubov Koptev.
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Winston Smith says:
July 13, 2016 at 8:42 pm
As much as I disagree with the JW org and their coercive control, two wrongs don’t make a right. This Russian policy is an oppressive trampling of the rights of all free people, not just Jdubs. Does this law also restrict concerned citizens from going door-to-door with petitions and similar concerns? What you teach and practice in your own home or share online is your business, not the government’s. The whole thing seems very Soviet and KGB to me. When the rights of one group are threatened, the rights of all are threatened.
WS
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Julian G says:
July 11, 2016 at 6:20 am
For anyone who has already woken up or is starting that process, it’s really easy to see the coercion, lies and brain washing propaganda presented in the convention right from the start. It is disgusting actually.
But what do you do when those still immerse in their indoctrination come out at the end of the sessions feeling that, in their own words, it’s the best convention ever and that it’s food at the proper time?
What I’ve noticed, and clearly it is the case of my wife and most witness friends, is that they actually do not listen to what it’s been said. This time round, I actually put attention on how the people around me behave during the talks, and I was convinced that the reasons why most witnesses remain indoctrinated are because they
1. do not actually listen to the program, they are physically present but constantly looking at the clock to mark lunchtime
2. do not actually read the literature, they scan it and never open it again
3. watch the videos, but they do not make the mental link between fiction and reality, perhaps because the videos are intentionally made to influence the emotions rather than reasoning
4. do not process the information presented after the sessions, i.e. they just assume it’s right because it comes from the WT
5. go to the assemblies to hear the latest gossip, show off their latest purchases, or to meet potential boyfriends/girlfriends
It’s really sad to see people who are intelligent and bright in other aspects of life become like zombies, when found themselves in contexts like this one; it’s like they switch their brains OFF as soon as the music starts.
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Big B says:
July 15, 2016 at 6:34 am
@ Julian G;
Absolutely correct in your five point synopsis of all conventions that I have ever attended. A giant Bore-a-thon; hours and hours of mind dulling nonsense. I remember looking at my watch, closing my eyes and praying for lunch. ‘Oh sweet merciful God please heavenly Father, let it be lunch’!
The last convention I attended, before my family and I completely faded, was back in 2013 at ‘God’s Word is Truth!’ District Convention.
The very last talk on the Friday afternoon program
was entitled “Believe Inspired Truth, Not Inspired Error”. I thought that this would be the talk where the G.B. would finally come clean and admit their past failings. Really? Who was I kidding, no such luck!
The whole talk devoted to the 3 unclean demonic frogs and their Satan inspired expressions in Revelation. (Jesus, really?) I had about tuned out (mesmerized into a brain-dead coma of boredom) when my son directed my attention to the speaker who said, in no uncertain terms, that ‘those that seek a higher secular education were making themselves tools of the Devil’. Same old song and dance, ‘Give more time to Jehovah as the time of the end is approaching’. What an insult to anyone (including myself and my son) trying to better themselves for taking care of their family’s physical needs!
The majority of young people searching for mates or listening to the latest gossip (#5) were outside at the time and did not hear this exhortation to remain uneducated, thus be in a perpetual state of holy mendicancy.
Needless to say, that idiotic talk did it for all of us. That was my absolutely last convention address.
“No more for me, thanks I’m full!”
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Winston Smith says:
July 15, 2016 at 7:46 am
@Big B and Julian G:
Great points. It is amazing how some of these speakers can talk for so long and really say nothing – or at least nothing of value.
But you are right, most really don’t pay close attention. They are there for the social aspect, to be seen others, etc. if you were to ask them what new thing did you learn today, you will probably get a blank stare. Or otherwise some psychobabble repetition of JW nonsense that they already knew but forgot they knew.
WS
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Big B says:
July 15, 2016 at 10:28 am
@ Winston Smith;
Yes indeed. How about those long winded Temple dedication prayers given at the end of the sessions?
Everything was mentioned, every talk, every single point ad nauseum.
‘God bless the buzzin’ of the bees and cigarette trees, the soda water fountain, the lemonade spring where the blue bird sings, in the Big Rock Candy Mountain’.
How many times I sat down in disgust before those long winded old goats concluded their Pharisaic prayers must be in the dozens.
Thankfully I will never attend any meeting or assembly ever again!
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Michaela says:
July 11, 2016 at 6:37 am
Thank you for all your work in creating these resources. Although I “woke up” a long time ago (I’m a so-called fader), your research and exposés have helped me track what my parents have been getting fed with and contextualize behavior and talk from them with the scary new material coming out over the last few years. After watching the “Sonja” shunning section of your series, I wrote my parents an email asking for their reassurance that they would not shun me based on the new “unrepentant wrongdoers” line. They did give me that assurance, but that was before they actually went to the convention–I think they’ve just finished yesterday. You’re right–the frame in which they’ve placed the vids is alarming in its brazenness, and truly shocks the conscience. But the perverse script-flipping on shunning–that JWs should feel abandoned, insulted and victimized by those leaving the org–has been there for a while a little more subtly. The one thing the WT has always been good at is convincing people they should never feel a thing without checking to make sure it’s the way they “should” feel and adjusting accordingly. My own mother invokes “our different goals” to justify her lack of contact with me, and has expressed her felt “pain” that I “abandoned” the Truth. Even in her assurance that she won’t shun me, she blurted, “You’re going to die!” I fear now that she will retrospectively look at my previous email plea as a temptation straight from Satan, and renege on her promise to me, now that she’s sated on her “food at the proper time.” Although I can’t see anything but condescension, illogic, and coercion in these talks, I have to recognize that they look at these talking heads as deliverers of God-given “encouragement”: a chilling word, considering that the organization is encouraging people to kill themselves.
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Candlestick says:
July 11, 2016 at 12:26 pm
Michaela – I totally understand your situation. My mom and sister just attended their convention a couple weeks back. Just a few days ago my sister blew up my phone (with 17 texts) about how the convention was so great and how there’s still time; “we love you, and Jehovah loves you […] even more the time is critical right now even you see it. […] we want to help you but you have to help yourself. we love you so much and we want to see in the paradise along with us. […] the brothers all they talk about is getting into Paradise. The things we see are fading away and our outlook to paradise is eternal.” Ugh.. for one, she has health problems, so I feel a little bit of an excuse for her, as intellectually she’s not really a mature adult. But, my mom is also giving me strongly worded text messages about coming back. They actually suggested i watch the videos at jw.org. Haven’t told them yet that I saw them even before they had. This is THE WORST CONVENTION EVER! preying on the followers and keeping them in-check; and trying to get them to go after their family members, cause they can’t keep their own rank and file. All the best to you Michaela. Hang in there. I hope your mom doesn’t go back on her word. Sadly, if she’s an indoctrinated one to the core, she likely will.
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Michaela says:
July 11, 2016 at 1:22 pm
Thanks for the supportive words Candlestick 🙂 My dad said he would never shun me, unless I became a serial killer; my mother was more equivocal and said she was a “flawed Witness” because she couldn’t do it. I asked her if that meant all she needed was to become less flawed and she would, and she said sheepishly that she would never be that good of a Witness. I could barely even say to her that not wanting to shun your children means you are NORMAL, not flawed, for fear she would think I was trying to apostasize to her…the position they put people in is so absurd.
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Candlestick says:
July 12, 2016 at 9:16 am
Wow.. that’s insane. Similarly, my mom mentioned not too long ago that her best friend (JW) was giving her a bit of the cold shoulder. I asked why. She said ‘well, I think she is bothered that I still have a relationship with you’.. so my JW mom is some-what being shunned by her own bff, cause she has a relationship WITH HER DAUGHTER! how upsetting! i told my mom ‘wow, i’m sorry you have such a sucky best friend mom. Who would be upset with their friend, cause they continue to have a relationship with their child?’ — my mom sheepishly agreed, and then slowly changed the subject. Fast forward to now, when all my mom wants to do — post the WORST CONVENTION EVER — is to ‘bring me back’. I will not ever go back to that cult. I just wish they weren’t so sucked in to see the reality that stares them square in the face constantly.
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Michaela says:
July 12, 2016 at 3:48 pm
That really sucks! I sympathize. My parents sent me and my my sister (unbaptized lesbian with a wife who my parents refuse to recognize) “Return to Jehovah” brochures and letters…it was so tone-deaf…sigh.
I hope that our parents surprise us and one day they call us, breezily informing us that they realized it was all nonsense and they’re ready to live rather than continue to enslave their brains and emotional lives to the WT, and won’t you come visit? I feel like at least some people have got to be having those conversations! This scary doubling-down has got to be making some people feel like, “Whoa, this is not what I signed up for.” Not all, of course, but some. One can hope 🙂
Twmack says:
July 11, 2016 at 8:14 am
The way to develop loyalty to JHVH, according to one
speaker, is to “prayerfully study the Bible”. Which
in truth means prayerfully study watchtower publications.
Studying the Bible on its own is something they definitely
discourage. They know if you did this their fruitcake
doctrines would crumble.
You would look in vain for any reference to an overlapping
generation. Ask any JW to point this out to you in the
Bible and I guarantee they’ll be tongue tied.
I couldn’t resist putting one elder on the spot with this
(My own brother in law, a 50 year plus JW). He was
flustered and blustered and was completely
incoherent. I was embarrassed for him although I must
admit I chuckled inside to see him squirm.
I’m a little Devil !
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Winston Smith says:
July 13, 2016 at 8:57 pm
Twmack,
Although I am a deist and I consider the bible the work of men, I still find value to studying it. I recently reread the book of Daniel and for the first time it actually makes sense. Now that I can read it without the JW prejudices, and consider the scholarly notes and references associated with it: recognizing that it was compiled around the time of the Maccabees and most of the “prophecies” have to do with the Seleucidian rule of Palestine makes everything fall into place. I could never makes heads or tails of the King of the North vs King of the South when I tried to use Watchtower’s interpretations. Now that I see it was the rivalry between Syria and Egypt it makes a lot more sense.
WS
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dee2 says:
July 14, 2016 at 6:35 am
WS,
Because the WT refuses to admit that the author’s(s’) prediction in Daniel 11 regarding the death of Antiochus Epiphanes (Antiochus IV), the Seleucid king of Syria was wrong, the WT has, over the years, created various predictions of the fulfillment of the failed prophecy in Daniel 11 by identifying who the “King of the North” and the “King of the South” is in its various publications. The collapse of the Soviet Union has seen a cooling off of WT predictions:
http://ed5015.tripod.com/JwKingOfTheNorth25.html
The author of Daniel accurately refers to two campaigns which Antiochus Epiphanes (Antiochus IV), the Seleucid king of Syria, led against Egypt, but then speaks of a third, after which Antiochus was predicted to die on the coast of Palestine (Daniel 11:40-45). This did not happen. Whereas the writer had been accurate up to 165 BCE, from that point on he revealed ignorance of the movements of Antiochus Epiphanes, so betraying the fact that he was writing prophecy and not history.
The prediction concerning Antiochus’s final battle and place of death “between the sea and the holy mountain” (Daniel 11:45) was inaccurate, and so we know that this prophecy was completed before the news of his death reached Jerusalem. Antiochus
died in Persia, in late 164 BCE.
Prior to Daniel 11:40, the author(s) has been recording past events under the Babylonian, Median, Persian and Greek empires. In Daniel 11:40-45, he really attempts to predict the future. He prophesizes that a king of the south (of the Ptolemaic dynasty) will attack the Greeks in Judea, under Antiochus. The Greeks will win, will lay spoil to all of northeast Africa, and return to Judea whereAntiochus will die. The end of history will then occur. The author(s) appeared to be a poor psychic because none of these events actually happened. Antiochus did die in 164 BCE, but it was in Persia.
This is one of the give aways that the book of Daniel was apparently completed before 164 BCE, during the Maccabean period and that the author of Daniel was writing history and not prophecy.
http://www.religioustolerance.org/daniel1.htm
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JBob says:
July 13, 2016 at 11:53 pm
@Twmack please don’t insult a wondrous dessert and Xmas treat such as sweet, rum-ful, moist fruitcake!
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Doc Obvious says:
July 11, 2016 at 9:13 am
Laws are what defines people. There are many laws and law givers. Some good, some bad. Every country in the world has laws. Even God has laws. Sometimes God’s laws conflict with the world’s laws.
God in the Holy Bible states that he is a God who demands exclusive devotion. What does the word, “exclusive” means? According to Webster’s Dictionary, the word “exclusive” means not shared : available to only one person or group.
So the question arises, why would God want to share his devotion with another source? Watchtower has a legal department inside their religion. My question is why would God want to share his laws with another set of laws made by someone else?
It kind of defeats the whole “exclusive devotion” principle mentioned in the Bible. In my opinion, Watchtower wants the best of both worlds scenario. They want to be known as a “religion” that stands for “freedom of religion” and at the same time they believe they should be no part of the world.
Another interesting point is that in the United States, the Supreme Court of the United States (a.k.a SCOTUS) is part of the Federal Government. A government, that according to Watchtower, is part of Satan’s organization, or part of the world.
Watchtower has been involved in SCOTUS over 50 times. Their even proud of this “accomplishment”. Their latest SCOTUS victory came when a mayor in Ohio determined that Jehovah’s Witnesses should register at the local government office. Watchtower states that this infringed on their First Amendment rights, or Freedom of Religion.
Now with the latest Child Abuse scandal, if people reported to the police incidents of child abuse and the Jehovah’s registered with the local government, the community would be protected from unwanted guests who are criminals. But, this is not the case. I believe it would be right to retry this case in the SCOTUS with this new evidence and see if SCOTUS would reverse their decision.
Reply
finallyfree says:
July 11, 2016 at 9:14 am
I am worried about my younger brother being subjected to all this in a week or two. He’s half in, being pressured by the still-in family but not enjoying life as a witness.
Regarding “spiritistic medicine” I think reiki is one of the treatments included in this, and hypnotism. I was warned against reiki specifically, because it’s a “spiritual healing” .. a bit like getting prayed over. Rubbish and nonsense!
Reply
Wt faithful says:
July 11, 2016 at 9:56 am
Cedars you always pick on JW’s
Reply
Eyes opened says:
July 11, 2016 at 12:24 pm
Is it really picking on someone to expose harmful teachings that have such a profound and ruining effect on others. As a Wt faithful aren’t you picking on people’s religions when you engage in the ministry? I would consider these Watchtower exposes as a potentially live saving warning, like a tornado warning or hurricane warning. People are allowed the choice to heed the warnings or not. At least they can be presented with enough facts to make an informed decision that’s right for them.
Regards
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Julian G says:
July 12, 2016 at 12:38 am
It’s called JW Survey mate
Reply
Winston Smith says:
July 14, 2016 at 5:19 am
WT faithful
Please review the about JW Survey page. It says that part of its purpose is so that individuals “can give their honest opinions about Watchtower and the increasingly cult-like direction in which it is headed.”
With this purpose in mind, do you expect the articles to be supportive of Witness Doctrines and the teachings and actions of the GB? Sorry you feel like you are being picked on, but the nature of this site is to allow the editors and commenters to voice their criticisms of the org, which they are not allowed to do within the typical JW settings without being labeled apostates.
I’d suggest you develop a bit of a “thicker skin” and not be in a hurry to feel offended when someone voices an opinion contrary to your own.
WS
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Dan says:
July 11, 2016 at 10:09 am
I really appreciate this website Lloyd. I was raised as a JW in the 1970s, drifted away at the age of 15 and thought I had sorted out my head about it all. I realise now that I hadn’t, and that I am still (at 52) quite angry about some things. I have siblings who were terrified as kids by the ‘armageddon’ pictures in the books, and by lurid descriptions of ‘the demons’ (are they still around??) and what they did, as described from the platform. Even so, I have always tended to defend them a little bit from the worst criticisms – I never really thought they were a cult. It was hard to square that notion of a cult with the mostly quite nice, inoffensive (if slightly weak) people I remember in the congregation. I can see it now, no question.
Two points to make: one is a question, and I genuinely wonder what you think about this – I’m not trying to stick up for them. What do you think is the motivation of the members of the governing body (and others in positions of influence in the JWs?) Is there a financial benefit for them, or is it about status? Or do you think they are genuine but misguided? I was never sure how the finances of the organisation worked, or how the people running it made a living. I’m not aware that they have lavish lifestyles out of the money that goes into those ‘contributions boxes'(!) but maybe I’m wrong.
Secondly: I wonder what the record is for the ‘longest shunning’??! I have a relative who was ‘shunned’ at a family funeral by a JW after being disfellowshipped (basically for being a normal teenager) 40 years before. Perhaps there should be a prize…
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Paranoid Android says:
July 11, 2016 at 2:13 pm
Hi Dan
Good question.
What motivates any cult leader?
The position of power.
The adoration.
The GB are the rockstars.
Power and influence are an extremely addictive combo.
I imagine they live very comfortably and want for nothing, but in my opinion, based upon the documented motives of what drives most cult leaders, it’s the heady rush of superiority that motivates the Watchtower leaders.
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Elijah says:
July 12, 2016 at 8:45 am
My guess to your first question would be a combination of both being completely deluded and loving the status/power that it brings. My wife has sometimes made the point “well, they’re not living in mansions and don’t have a lavish lifestyle, etc”. But they’ve insulated themselves in a world where they are revered around the world. All of their travel expenses are paid for. They don’t pay a cent for anything. Fancy watches. The best suits. That’s all from donation money. They don’t have jobs. They don’t know what it’s like out in the real world, and if they have had some previous experience in it, it’s been all forgotten.
So, even though they may not live in mansions (but cushy accommodations near a remote controlled lake isn’t bad either), they do live a lavish lifestyle, in my opinion. Who wouldn’t want to not have to pay for anything and be surrounded by people day in and day out that will basically respond to your beck and call?
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Dan says:
July 12, 2016 at 9:11 am
I guess you and paranoid android are right..they have created their own very comfortable little world where they really matter. And I suppose going round thinking God chose you to be his mouthpiece on earth must do something for your ego. And they do always look very well turned out, with the expensive looking suits. In fact every JW video I see features JWs in very comfortable middle class homes (apart from the poor woman who was asked to clean the toilets and was supposed to be OK with that…I
wonder if the GB members take their turn at that particular chore??)
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FadingJosie says:
July 13, 2016 at 10:44 pm
@Dan
The first question you raised is exactly something I have wondered over the last while…what is the motivation – it seems too simple to say that it is money or power though that may be exactly it. Further to that, do they honestly believe their own interpretations and ideas or do they know deep down that they may be fleecing everyone (if money or power were the motive then possibly they do?). We know that they are deliberately hiding the child abuse allegations – no articles in the jw.org Newsroom proclaiming their innocence or persecution by Satan’s system – all very quietly kept away from the adoring members! What is their reason for doing that…power, money and continued influence surely play a part here…I am still pondering.
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Winston Smith says:
July 14, 2016 at 10:35 am
Ray Franz pointed out that the GB are victims of a concept. And that concept is the organization itself. They are convinced that this organization (created long before any of them and yet perpetuated by them) is lead by God and is therefore infallible. As individual men they admit they are fallable. But when they are together they react as almost a hive-mind mentality where they believe they can do no wrong.
BTW, Ray Franz was a great example of someone who was willing to give up his cushy life as a JW “rockstar” and earn a living by the “sweat of his brow” in order to be true to his conscience. At nearly 60 (when most men are thinking about retirement) he left his cushy GB post to take a manual labor job, rather than to violate his conscience.
WS
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ScotWm says:
July 13, 2016 at 11:50 pm
Regarding the motivation of cult leaders: “If you see me as your savior, I’ll be your savior. If you see me as your God, I’ll be your God.” — Jim Jones.http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/americanexperience/features/transcript/jonestown-transcript
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Twmack says:
July 11, 2016 at 11:26 am
Does ‘the faithful and discreet slave’ [Watchtower organization] endorse independent groups of Witnesses who meet together to engage in Scriptural research or debate?—Matt. 24:45, 47. No, it does not. K,M, Sept, 2011 p
“Thus the Bible is an organizational book and belongs to the Christian congregation as an organization, not to individuals, regardless of how sincerely they may believe that they can interpret the Bible. For this reason the Bible cannot be properly understood without Jehovah’s visible organization in mind.”—The Watchtower, October 1, 1967, p. 587
“In Jehovah’s organization it is not necessary to spend a lot of time and energy in research, for there are brothers in the organization who are assigned to that very thing, …” Watchtower 1967 Jun 1 p.338
3 quotes from wt showing that private study of Bible is discouraged.
So what’s the point of individuals praying for gods spirit if the bible is
not meant to be understood by individuals? And don’t waste energy
we’ve got brothers here who will hand you the answers on a plate.
So again what’s the point in praying for gods help?
You can rely on me100% the con man said to the sucker.
Reply
Telescopium says:
July 13, 2016 at 3:46 pm
Twmack,
I remember the sinking feeling I had after reading the September 2011 KM.
I was still in at the time, but even then I couldn’t fathom how the Organization could say something like that in one statement, and then in another laud C.T.Russell for his zealous Bible study.
Maybe they’re afraid someone will find spiritual food on their own… In which case the Governing Body would be out of a job.
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Chantal says:
July 13, 2016 at 5:25 pm
I remember that too… I was in and at the meeting. Just thinking, one more nail in the coffin….how controlling!!
Reply
JBob says:
July 14, 2016 at 12:07 am
@TWmack @telescopium – if I may flex my muscles a bit.. The fallout of Ray Franz being booted from the Governing Body, then disfellowshipped for eating a meal with a d/f individual (who now hosts his own YouTube channel), was that individual study groups around HQ were targeted in the 1980’s in a massive “witch hunt”. Ed Dunlap and others who had contributed to a “new wave”–a refreshing liberation from traditional twisting and wedging of scripture into the 144,000/”other sheep” archetype model–ignited a focus on scripture. These “secret studies” also resulted in “secret Communions” but in typical fashion the leadership began to squash it.
This paranoia from the leadership trickled down to local congregations so that any events “organized” without the oversight of elders or “approval” might be construed as a “sign of rebellion” resulting in disciplinary action.
To this day, a wedding reception, an entertainment “gathering” or other event that is “JW”-saturated (usually meaning JW-only invites) is scripted and approved by the “party bloc leaders”. About the only “event” that isn’t scripted is a small group of JW’s meeting for lunch/dinner and even that is wrapped in an opening prayer heavily doused with J*’s and Watchtower-centric references.
So, literally, eat, sleep, and poop Watchtower 24/7.
Reply
Winston Smith says:
July 15, 2016 at 7:49 am
@JBob: “So, literally, eat, sleep, and poop Watchtower 24/7.”
Tried it. Quite unpleasant. Never again!
WS
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Telescopium says:
July 15, 2016 at 3:20 pm
Oh no! Not the Watchtower Diet!
Tons of fiber – but leaves you with no energy at the end of the day.
Reply
Outandabout says:
July 11, 2016 at 12:36 pm
Go, Watchtower, go! This is all good news. To me, this shows their desperation and lack of options. Post 1975 again, only this time they have the internet to contend with.
Surely they must know that all this will only shine the light on them even more at a time when what they really want is to just quietly exist in the background and let all those child abuse lies die down and just let them continue doing what cults do.
What a position to be in, aye.
Lets review: it’s a child abusing, victim silencing, pedo protecting, baby murdering, suicide inducing, family busting, public purse sucking death cult.
Reply
Paranoid Android says:
July 11, 2016 at 2:02 pm
Good work Cedars.
Thank you for this.
Reply
Average Joe says:
July 11, 2016 at 2:46 pm
Hi Lloyd. I can’t remember if this was Friday as it was all a blur to be honest but what shocked me most was this: getting guilt tripped for making friends at work. The sister (part of the bunker videos) married to the elder of the group was relating her story and she ended up keeping all her workmates at distance, even resorting to not have coffee breaks with them “keeping contact to the minimum”. It may seem bizarre to readers on here that that is the main point that gets my goat but I view all the others as just ludicrous and think that nobody in their right mind as a genuine human being would follow through on. However, I believe that even genuinely nice JWs could be guilt tripped into isolating themselves at work and thus cutting themselves off from real life and real people.
You’re spot on as always with the analysis Lloyd. Cheers!
Reply
JBob says:
July 14, 2016 at 12:16 am
@Avg Joe – yes, there goes that “contradictory” and conflicting goals of the Watchtower stuff again. They want you to do “casual witnessing” to office mates, yet at the same time discourage social interaction.
Back in the “old days” from which “Mad Men” (the tv show) derived, coffee breaks would be replaced with “going out for drinks” at lunch or after work. Allegedly one trip out with coworkers would lead to a night of libertine an lascivious behavior with the wafting scent of gin and regrets in the morning.
Here’s to the ladies who lunch… ‘cuz everybody dies.
Reply
Winston Smith says:
July 14, 2016 at 8:43 pm
@AJ
I totally get your revulsion to this video. It is one of the more subtle and insidious methods of control. Perhaps the most cult like and dangerous of them all. Cut them off from all outside contact and only fill them with Watchtower sanctioned thoughts.
WS
Reply
dee2 says:
July 11, 2016 at 4:50 pm
@Idontknowhatodo:
Sadly, when people are indoctrinated, they will only listen to what the GB says. Nevertheless, in the event of a transfusion, you could perhaps try to bolster your position by using the following arguments if you find them useful:
The “abstain from blood” command in Acts 15 was based on the Mosaic Law****** and the Mosaic Law had nothing to do with blood transfusions:
The Law stated that blood was not to be eaten which was with regard to the blood from DEAD animals, not from humans (Genesis 9:4, Leviticus 7:26; 17:10, 12-14; 19:26, Leviticus 7:26-27); blood must be poured out onto earth, in reference to DEAD animals not humans (Deuteronomy 12:16, 23, 24).
So the law was not concerned with blood coming out of a living person or animal. The bible talked about the blood of an animal AFTER it was sacrificed, AFTER it was dead.
As far as I know, it is for these reasons that the Jews, who are descendants of the writers of the Hebrew scriptures, and who adhere solely to the Hebrew scriptures, do not ban blood transfusions as a religious rite.
In any event, when a person donates blood to be used in a transfusion, they are alive not dead. Their life has not been taken away as in the case of the animal that was sacrificed.
Further, even when meat is properly drained, there is still some blood in the meat, so anyone who eats meat, also eats blood. So it’s not possible to not eat blood as per the Mosaic Law if you are a meat eater. The reason why meat is a source of iron is because of the residual blood in it, which is why persons (including JWs) eat meat as a source of iron. It certainly is odd that you can eat meat as a source of iron because of the blood in it, but can’t get a needed blood transfusion.
_______
******The command at Acts 15:28 was based on the ceremonial and moral obligations of the Mosaic Law. The Council at Jerusalem had issued a formal resolution counselling Christians to “abstain from meats offered to idols and from blood, and from things strangled, and from formication” because they had treated the ceremonial and moral obligations of Moses as of equal force.
Proof that the Mosaic Law is the basis for these commands, can be seen when the apostle Paul quietly, though without referring to it, set this resolution of the Council at Jerusalem one side, and, having vigorously condemned the fornicator, radically declares that meat is not polluted because the animal from which it is taken had first been sacrificed in a pagan temple – 1 Corinthians 10:25.
Paul’s radical response at 1 Corinthians 10:25 had to do with the issue of the Jews who thought that, by eating meat which had once been offered to idols, they participated in the idolatrous worship; and the Jewish Christians held the same view. The Gentile Christians, on the other hand, saw no harm in buying and eating such meat as they had always been accustomed to do.
Incidentally, there was actually an irreparable gulf between Paul and the Jerusalem Church as Paul was teaching his Gentile converts that with the advent and mission of Jesus, there was no longer a requirement to observe Jewish practices such as their dietary constraints whereas men from Jerusalem were telling Paul’s Gentile converts that they had to follow the Laws set down by Moses. These men were teaching that as followers of Jesus, Paul’s Gentile converts had to be Jews:http://www.jwstudies.com/The_Watchtower_s_Achilles_Heel.pdf
Best wishes.
Reply
dee2 says:
July 12, 2016 at 11:04 am
The above link seems to be broken. Correct link:
http://www.jwstudies.com/The_Watchtower_s_Achilles__Heel.pdf
Reply
dee2 says:
July 12, 2016 at 11:10 am
Also of interest:
– “The Watchtower’s Achilles’ Heel”:http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/topic/266009/watchtowers-achilles-heel?page=1
– “The Watchtowers Handling of Blood”:http://www.jwstudies.com/The_Watchtowers_Handling_of_Blood_Revision_2.pdf
Reply
Free Willy says:
July 11, 2016 at 4:56 pm
Hi Cedars being from America and listening to your commentary . I must say I really like your British accent . You are a a very articulate speaker and very interesting to listen too. I wanted to ask you . When you were one of Jehovah’s witnesses where you considered a good speaker?
Reply
Dwc says:
July 11, 2016 at 5:15 pm
@John Cedars,
The treatment they are speaking about which is “questionable” is “Reiki”.
Reiki is a Japanese technique for stress reduction and relaxation that also promotes healing. It is administered by “laying on hands” and is based on the idea that an unseen “life force energy” flows through us and is what causes us to be alive. If one’s “life force energy” is low, then we are more likely to get sick or feel stress, and if it is high, we are more capable of being happy and healthy… from http://www.reiki.org/faq/whatisreiki.html
This is a popular therapy with a lot of Brothers and sisters. Hence not WT approved, hence from the Devil Bobby Boucher!!
Reply
Winston Smith says:
July 14, 2016 at 8:57 pm
Sounds an awful lot like kinesiology which was the latest fad in a JW congregation I was in about 20 years ago.
WS
Reply
Harry Cadanza says:
July 12, 2016 at 9:36 am
It may be, people who feel they are weak, feel they have to have a group (G.B.) control their every thought and move. Fortunately the G.B. enjoy being alive because they love the control they have over people so they like to live, like being in charge. I feel they have the magnificent seven set in place and in charge in case someone gets to big for their britches. If you know what I mean.
Reply
Mindshadow says:
July 12, 2016 at 12:33 pm
You wish it *won’t* be the worst of all time?? *confused*
Reply
Gulp says:
July 12, 2016 at 1:00 pm
No surprises Radiohead.
Reply
Gulp says:
July 12, 2016 at 1:08 pm
Ah the fake plastic trees, my iron lung.
(Sure there was an article about an iron lung, with respects, in the Awake).
Reply
Harry Cadanza says:
July 12, 2016 at 4:35 pm
Their shunning policy makes it one of the most unlovingest religions ever. My niece went to the hospital because of a brain aneurysm. Her disfellowshipped husband called my sister (her mom). My sister ignored the call because he is disfellowshipped. My sister said she would find out later from her daughter why he was calling. My sister was irritated. Later my sister found out her daughter had died when she finally returned his phone call three days later. She picked up the phone because he wouldn’t stop calling. It is an unloving organization.
Reply
Harry Cadanza says:
July 12, 2016 at 4:42 pm
My sister doesn’t realize the fault lies with the society. She blames her disfellowshipped son-in-law for the fact she didn’t answer her phone. She wishes she had been with her at the hospital. She is Soooo brain washed.
Reply
Candlestick says:
July 13, 2016 at 1:15 pm
What? What fantasy land is she living in? he was trying to call her and she wouldn’t answer? Goodness, this really get’s me PO! How can they be so blinded? I guess I was too, so I shouldn’t be so cruel. But it’s right in front of them. If only they could wake up. Then your sister might have had one last time to at least hold her daughter. 🙁 Ugh, it’s sickening. But, regardless, I’m very sorry for your loss.
Reply
Winston Smith says:
July 14, 2016 at 9:01 pm
“It’s right right in front of them”
Yes, but bear in mind they are wearing “Watchtower goggles” (somewhat like “beer goggles”).
WS
Reply
Jeremiah Law says:
July 12, 2016 at 6:17 pm
I’ve just begun watching your convention footage by recommendation. I have to say, after six years of being disgellowshipped, I went through a string of emotions. After a year and half of therapy from an extremely reputable religious trauma therapist, out of Oakland Cal., I thought I had it licked. Not so. They are certainly putting the screws to the sheep. I first felt humor, then quickly to anger because I can’t believe I stayed as long as I did. Born in, I lost 38 years of my life. If I’d had known I’d be this happy out side, I’d have left when I told my mom I wanted out. I was about 15. Right before I got baptized.
Thank you sir for your arduous labor of love. It has greatly helped me! Peace and love my friend.
Reply
free@last says:
July 13, 2016 at 8:48 am
@ Jeremiah
Thanks for posting, I can totally relate. As a born-in sometimes I wonder how I could have ever believed such nonsense! Im just happy that even tho I was a pioneer at one time I never actually studied wth anyone who got baptised (guess i was a lousy pioneer )Would you mind sharing the name of your trauma therapist? I live in the SF bay area as well.
Reply
Winston Smith says:
July 14, 2016 at 9:08 pm
For us born-ins, we were fed this malarkey from day one. Reality was hidden from us. We were told not to trust our teachers or our friends. Only the Watchtower really cared for us, so long as we obeyed their wishes. We were imprisoned on threat of losing our families and told horror stories that if we left terrible things would happen. No wonder it took so long to leave. I was likewise imprisoned for 38 years in this cult.
WS
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rob says:
July 13, 2016 at 7:47 am
The pharasiacal rules in this religion defy all logic.
Not answering a phone call from a child or relative is simply ignorant in my opinion. How do they not take into account that the call may be urgent or an emergency situation?
Following the rule of shunning may lead to major regrets on the part of the one who is doing the shunning when they realize that they have wasted an entire lifetime of what could have been a wonderful relationship with wonderful memories.
Instead they have a non-existent relationship with someone who they think is not worthy of their time. This to me, is the epitomy of arrogance and self importance.
Reply
Candlestick says:
July 13, 2016 at 1:20 pm
well said, Rob. I am struggling right now with how to tell my mom (again!) that I am NOT coming back to the religion. And that if she wants to put up this big wedge in our relationship again (after 15 years ago doing so) — then she’ll be the one making the choice to walk away from what i considered to be finally a healthy mother-daughter relationship. She was FINE . . . up until this stupid WORST CONVENTION EVER! The JW org is losing so many members that they are hell-bent on guilting the ones they have, and trying to coerce them to get the ‘lost sheep’ back again into the fold. I cannot believe it is working so well. Well, for the indoctrinated it’s working. I’m not EVER going back!
Reply
rob says:
July 13, 2016 at 3:15 pm
I too have family members who have distanced themselves from me due to the fact that I am no longer a witness.
I used to feel angry about this but now I just feel sad for myself and for them that we are missing out on sharing our ups and downs and successes and failures and life in general. But i do have my memories…
I really feel cheated by this religion that destroys families and like you I will never ever go back.
I know that God and Jesus don’t endorse shunning or man made rules or corporate policies disguised as a religion or anything that the witness religion has been doing that violates basic human rights or violates the protection of innocent children.
Reply
Winston Smith says:
July 14, 2016 at 9:22 pm
My grandmother was raised a JW. Her older brother wanted nothing to do with the religion from a young age (smart guy). So she spent the next 60 years shunning him. He is now long since dead and she is pushing 90. A few years ago she lamented that she didn’t get to have a close relationship with her brother. Talk about regrets! And the religion claims that they don’t disrupt families! What a load of BS.
WS
Reply
EAZ says:
July 13, 2016 at 9:12 am
Cedars, im sorry but you’re pathetic. Why dont you get a life? Complaining is useless
Reply
Grace says:
July 13, 2016 at 2:40 pm
idiot.
Reply
Chantal says:
July 13, 2016 at 4:35 pm
Idiot
Reply
Harry Cadanza says:
July 13, 2016 at 4:56 pm
HAHAHAHAHAHA
Reply
Outandabout says:
July 13, 2016 at 7:18 pm
Poor bastard.
Reply
VictorE says:
July 14, 2016 at 5:58 am
VictorE
Christ complained a lot about the scribes and pharisees. Was he pathetic too?
Reply
Twmack says:
July 13, 2016 at 9:30 am
WT, often states that “God gave us free will because he
doesn’t want to be worshipped by Robots”.
But that’s precisely what he gets from this religion, Androids,
every part of their life is micro managed. –,
From life and death issues involving medical treatment, to
relatively minor ones like giving a child a birthday party
or even allowing facial hair to grow ( A perfectly natural process
for men). Very little of life is left that is not covered by some rule.
The R & F believe they are exercising their free will by following
these edicts. But they are being forced to comply by what
amounts to mental and emotional torture, “The act of Shunning”.
Rejection by family and friends, and by God.
Reply
Winston Smith says:
July 14, 2016 at 9:24 pm
By their logic God doesn’t want robots, merely humans who act like robots.
WS
Reply
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← The Friday Column: Five ways my life has changed for the better since I left my religion
The Friday Column: Outside the bubble →
The Worst Convention Ever – Part 5: Friday
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Posted on July 10, 2016
Part 5 of the Worst Convention Ever series shows some of the most disturbing material to-date
Part 5 of the Worst Convention Ever series shows some of the most disturbing material to-date
I don’t mind admitting it. When I decided to make a series of videos to compliment articles on JWsurvey about the “Worst Convention Ever” (the “Remain Loyal to Jehovah” 2016 regional convention) I bit off way more than I could chew.
I’m honestly not sure I would have committed to it if I’d known in advance there would be so much work involved.
The idea to do a video rebuttal series came to me after a Circuit Overseer leaked a batch of material intended for use at the convention, including 46 videos, to myself and a number of other exJW activists.
As overwhelmed as I was by the overload of digital cultish manipulation, I figured the videos could be grouped together into six parts, and thus dissected relatively easily.
But then, last month, we had an extra leak – and it changed everything. We now had three days’ worth of “official” video footage filmed at one of the conventions showing, not just the dramatization videos, but how the Governing Body wants them to be presented.
This turned everything on its head. A six-part series became a nine-part series as we scrambled to accommodate the extra material.
So, rather than being (as it was intended) a straightforward summary of the miscellaneous material not covered in the previous 4 parts, Part 5 is now arguably one of the most shocking videos in this series so far.
Why? Because it now deals with the talks given on the Friday of the program. And, well, there’s no easy way to put this: the Friday material alone proves that Watchtower has gone full-on cult, and unashamedly expects to be able to control the minds of Jehovah’s Witnesses.
Loyal in thought
Arguably nothing screams “cult” and “mind control” like a charismatic speaker emphatically urging his audience to have “tight control” over what enters their minds. In Jose Cintron Jnr,* a raven-haired bethelite with a hypnotic glair, a creepy grin and a penchant for melodrama, that is exactly what Watchtower have given us.
Despite his talk, titled “Maintain Loyalty in Thought,” being scripted for him by the Governing Body’s teaching committee (as is the case with almost all convention talks), Jose throws himself into it with gusto as though he had written every word himself.
Here is a man who has zero qualms in asking thousands to “bring their thoughts into captivity” and fill their brains only with Watchtower’s endless flow of propaganda.
Jose Cintron Jnr seems to revel in his opportunity to tell convention audiences to bring their thoughts "into captivity" to Watchtower
Jose Cintron Jnr seems to revel in telling convention audiences to bring their thoughts “into captivity” to Watchtower
The most cringe-worthy moment come when Cintron Jnr, who also makes an appearance as Sennacherib in the Hezekiah drama, deviates from his script slightly to ask his audience whether they would hesitate for a moment to dial 911 if they were to discover an intruder in their homes in the middle of the night.
The irony should be glaring to anyone who is aware that calling the police is precisely what a Witness is NOT supposed to do if they become aware of a far worse crime than breaking and entering – the sexual molestation of a child by a fellow Witness.
Don’t ask questions!
Jose’s talk was the first of a three-part symposium emphasizing the need for loyalty to Watchtower in thought, word and action. Chosen to handle the second part, dealing with loyalty in “word,” was the rather more robotic Cameron Haynes.
The main thrust of Haynes’ talk, as evidenced by the dramatization video, was to remind Witnesses not to speak against the elders. Apparently, no matter how poorly-behaved your elders are, if you have a grievance against them the last thing you should do is discuss this with others. After all, elders answer only to Watchtower, and not those they are appointed to serve.
Cameron Haynes stresses the need for Witnesses to support Watchtower teachings even when they don't understand them
Cameron Haynes stresses the need for Witnesses to support Watchtower teachings even when they don’t understand them
A more intriguing application of the need for loyalty “in word” arose in comments apparently directed at those who may question “new light,” or organizational adjustments, such as the recent scrapping of the much-loved Theocratic Ministry School (which has been replaced with a bible reading and door-to-door practice session).
Haynes admits that such changes might test the loyalty of Witnesses, but reminds them to greet these with “excitement” nonetheless. He then cites the example of the apostle Peter pledging his loyalty to Christ in John 6, when many disciples are repulsed by his teachings. This, apparently, establishes that Witnesses should support Watchtower doctrine even when they don’t understand it.
This chimes with what we have already seen with outrageous teachings such as that of the overlapping generation, which is based on an explanation that makes no logical sense. The Governing Body wants its followers to know that they don’t owe any coherent breakdown of their teachings. The role of rank and file Witnesses is to follow – not question, or even understand.
Better than life
The final talk of the Friday morning program has the telling title: “Jehovah’s Loyal Love Is Better Than Life!” The speaker used in the official convention footage, Reginald McCoy, seizes his opportunity to remind the audience that being a Jehovah’s Witness is indeed better than one’s very existence.
“Life without Jehovah’s loyal love would be meaningless and purposeless, which really doesn’t make for much of a life at all,” he says. “Jehovah’s loyal love does not change. That is why it is in fact better than life… having Jehovah’s loyal love is worth more than our own existence.”
Bear in mind: ordinary members of the public are invited to Witness conventions (at least in theory), meaning non-Witnesses are expected to stomach being told their lives are meaningless unless they pledge themselves to the organization.
Reginald McCoy admonishes his audience to view their lives as secondary to their relationship with Jehovah's organization
Reginald McCoy admonishes his audience to view their lives as secondary to their relationship with Jehovah’s organization
It’s probably worth stressing that such clearly ridiculous rhetoric comes, not from the mind of the speaker, but straight from the Governing Body – as shown from the following screen grab from the final part of the speaker’s outline…
Screen Shot 2016-07-10 at 15.19.12
Hence, even though convention audiences will assume McCoy was giving a heartfelt plea based on his own thoughts and experiences, he was in fact parroting his masters – Watchtower. And Watchtower wants Witnesses to believe their very lives come second to the privilege of being in “Jehovah’s organization.”
Feel abandoned by apostates
The Friday afternoon of the convention offers a double-whammy of cultishness with two symposiums. The first presents the 7-part Sergei video series, while the second emphasizes the need to shun disfellowshipped family members using a trilogy of videos featuring the fictitious Sonja.
In one of the videos of the Sergei series, Sergei’s friend is shown vanishing in ghost-like fashion from a congregation meeting, which is supposed to represent his turning apostate. I was intrigued to see how Brandon Harkey, again using the outline provided for him, would present this material.
xxx explains why Witnesses should take it personally when people leave their religion
Brandon Harkey explains why Witnesses should take it personally when people leave their religion
It turns out a very clever strategy is being deployed by Watchtower in further stigmatizing those, like myself, who decide to leave the organization for conscientious reasons.
Witnesses are not only supposed to fear and loath apostates like me as “mentally diseased.” They are also supposed to feel personally offended and insulted that they have been “abandoned” by their former brethren.
Harkey reads Matthew 10:35-36 where Jesus warns that a man’s enemies will be “those of his own household,” and applies the verse by saying: “Yes Jesus acknowledged here that a person’s own family, their own friends, might very well abandon them for choosing to serve Jehovah.”
Though this verse was indeed describing a scenario in which a Jewish or pagan family might expel one of their own for becoming a Christian, this has nothing to do with a Witness waking up from Watchtower indoctrination and deciding to walk.
In such a case it is the family, under orders from Watchtower, who shun the one making a conscientious stand. Far from viewing them as “enemies,” the apostate will generally continue to love his family despite the difference in beliefs, but is denied a relationship with them.
But because Watchtower recognises the manipulative value of helping Witnesses feel like victims, the verse in Matthew 10 is turned on its head. The apostate is framed as the aggressor, the one who has attacked his believing family by rejecting their faith.
Amazingly, even non-JW family friends, perhaps work colleagues or unbelieving spouses, are expected by the Governing Body to refrain from rejecting or questioning Watchtower teachings.
“Perhaps you’ve felt the abandonment that results when an unbelieving family member or friend ostracises, criticises us, ridicules us because we choose to serve Jehovah,” says Harkey, without explaining why it is incumbent on those who aren’t Witnesses to validate the beliefs of those who are.
Even current Witnesses who grow lukewarm in the face of Watchtower’s increasing cultishness, the recently-dubbed “Kevinly Class” (a nod to a character from the bunker videos), are rounded on as causes of personal anguish to devout Witnesses.
“Even within the congregation, we may at times feel a sense of abandonment perhaps by a friend who seems to withdraw from us as we’re striving to put kingdom interests first and do more for Jehovah,” bemoans Harkey.
“You turn to your friends for help, for support, as you’re striving to do more, as you’re putting spiritual goals first, but maybe you notice some seem to withdraw. Why? Well your goals, what’s most important to you, may now be somewhat different from theirs.”
Witnesses are again asked to feel affronted and attacked if those around them fail to lavish them with “support” in their quest to give everything for the organization. Such coercive rhetoric is easy to see through once you’re on the outside, but for Witnesses who are sufficiently desperate to feel oppressed and persecuted, it will work only too well – leaving countless relationships even more unsalvageable.
Martyr yourself for Watchtower
Readers of this website will already be familiar with the disturbing finale to the Sergei series, in which the main protagonist likely terminates his life for his beliefs by refusing blood. It falls to bethelite Jared Gossman to drill home Watchtower’s message that Sergei made the right choice by placing Watchtower’s interests ahead of his instinct for survival.
xxx makes it clear that Witnesses should be prepared for end their lives for the sake of their beliefs
Jared Gossman makes it clear that Witnesses should be prepared to end their lives for the sake of their beliefs
Gossman begins his talk by following the outline’s call to stigmatize as cowardly, thoughtless and selfish those who would “be disloyal to [Jehovah] in an attempt to preserve life.”
Screen Shot 2016-07-10 at 17.44.31
After reminding Witnesses of the importance of keeping their medical documents signed and up-to-date (heaven forbid they don’t get second thoughts when the time comes), Gossman urges them to make the ultimate sacrifice if called upon to do so: “How sad it would be [if] in an effort to extend our life just temporarily we sacrifice our loyalty to Jehovah and lose out on life for an eternity.”
Any Witnesses who may squirm at the idea of martyring themselves for Watchtower are urged to think happy thoughts: “Even if we did lose our life in this system we can think about the resurrection hope that we have when circumstances get difficult. We can think of ourselves experiencing the blessings Jehovah has in store – perhaps blessings we’ve told others about for many years – but we can see ourselves there enjoying them as a reward for our loyalty.”
Since it’s impossible for dead Jehovah’s Witnesses who died refusing blood to come back and confirm they were resurrected into a paradise earth, you will have to take Watchtower’s word on this.
Shun your family
It’s no longer a secret that the second Friday afternoon symposium contains some of the most potent pro-shunning propaganda we have yet seen on a JW convention program. But kudos to New Jersey elder Josh Sable for finding a way to stamp his own creativity on Watchtower’s message of hate.
xxx argues that the growth cycle of the lilac sets a precedent for JW families to shun disfellowshipped loved ones
Josh Sable argues that the growth cycle of the lilac sets a precedent for JW families to shun disfellowshipped loved ones
After the video is shown where Sonja is disfellowshipped and her mother won’t even pick up the phone when she calls, Sable comes up with a bizarre horticultural analogy to drive the point home.
“Did you know that it’s a pronounced cold snap in the dead of winter that triggers the lilac to bud and bloom come spring? Those frigid temperatures do something deep inside that plant to heighten its sweet fragrance, and to enhance the beauty of that cluster of flowers. When we look around Jehovah’s organization some of the most beautiful and sweet-smelling Christians are those who have allowed this internal process, or this chill of discipline, to make significant changes in their thinking and conduct. The result is nothing short of spectacular!”
Apparently when Jehovah’s Witnesses show love to one another, this is evidence that they are Christ’s true followers in fulfilment of his words at John 13:35. But when they treat their own flesh and blood with coldness and cruelty in obedience to their religious leaders – worry not! This can be justified due to some random plant’s growing cycle.
Inform on your brothers
It wouldn’t be a festival of Orwellian, cultish ideology without at least one incitement for the faithful to report on eachother to Big Brother should anybody fail to show loyalty to the hierarchy. Step forward bethelite Timothy Blazek to issue the necessary reminder.
xxx reminds Witnesses to inform on each other when wrongdoing is detected
Timothy Blazek reminds Witnesses to inform on each other when wrongdoing is detected
“When it comes to our friends, this might be an area that tests our loyalty – particularly when a friend gets involved in wrongdoing that should be brought to the attention of the elders,” says Blazek.
“Never would we want to allow misguided loyalty to a friend to overshadow our loyalty to Jehovah. If you recall, as we heard earlier the definition from the Greek language of loyalty carries the thought of holiness and righteousness, so what would the loving and loyal thing be to do if a friend was in such a circumstance? Approach the friend, urge him to seek the help of the elders and the parents and to speak to them. And then tell him that if he does not do it within a reasonable period of time – you will.”
Unlike Sable with his poetic lilac illustration, Blazek is here reading directly from the manuscript furnished him by the Governing Body, with only a few minor deviations.
Screen Shot 2016-07-10 at 21.21.24
Thus, immediately after the shunning symposium is ended, instructions are issued that will help add to the number of those shunned.
Not a moment’s thought is given that whatever the perceived wrongdoing is, which could be anything from sexual activity to smoking a cigarette, the punishment will almost never fit the crime.
Only in the case of a crime such as child molestation could an argument be made for family estrangement being appropriate (along with prosecution by the authorities, obviously) – but ironically elders require two witnesses to take any such accusation seriously.
By contrast, at least on the evidence of this talk, when it comes to a teenage Witness having a sexual relationship with the girl nextdoor, one snitching friend is enough to set things in motion.
Counting the cost
I’ve heard it said that there is nothing new about much of the material being pumped into the minds of Witnesses at this convention. Indeed, though I never paid as rapt attention at conventions as I was required to, I can vaguely remember frequent talks similar to those listed above.
The reason why I believe this is the “worst convention ever” is because, for the first time, the Governing Body’s hate-filled manuscripts are not deemed enough. As their video production resources have swollen in recent years, they have spotted an opportunity to enhance the already-potent propaganda at their conventions with sleek video dramatizations to make sure their message about the need for absolute obedience sinks in.
As much as I would like to think all of this cultic manipulation will drift over the heads of the majority in attendance (though in many cases, surely it will), we would be naive to think this. Jehovah’s Witnesses on the whole take their faith extremely seriously, and there will likely be real-world ramifications to the talks given at this convention.
People will start being shunned who weren’t shunned previously, and people who were hitherto mentally on the fence about blood transfusions will resolve to kill themselves by refusing blood if the opportunity presents itself, as a direct result of this convention. Make no mistake about that.
The awful videos promoting shunning, hatred of apostates and martyrdom, combined with the torrent of overt calls for unquestioned loyalty, even at the expense of one’s life, convince me we have never seen a Watchtower convention worse than this. I only wish I could say with confidence it won’t be the worst of all time.
new-cedars-signature3
Further reading:
◾Friendly Atheist coverage
◾JWsurvey articles on the “Worst Convention Ever
Translations: Romanian | …
*All name spellings of speakers have been guessed at, and may not be exact.
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← The Friday Column: Five ways my life has changed for the better since I left my religion
The Friday Column: Outside the bubble →
189 Responses to The Worst Convention Ever – Part 5: Friday
← Older Comments
rob says:
July 13, 2016 at 3:17 pm
I too have family members who have distanced themselves from me due to the fact that I am no longer a witness.
I used to feel angry about this but now I just feel sad for myself and for them that we are missing out on sharing our ups and downs and successes and failures and life in general. But i do have my memories…
I really feel cheated by this religion that destroys families and like you I will never ever go back.
I know that God and Jesus don’t endorse shunning or man made rules or corporate policies disguised as a religion or anything that the witness religion has been doing that violates basic human rights or violates the protection of innocent children.
Reply
Andrea says:
July 13, 2016 at 10:18 pm
“Did you know that it’s a pronounced cold snap in the dead of winter that triggers the lilac to bud and bloom come spring? Those frigid temperatures do something deep inside that plant to heighten its sweet fragrance, and to enhance the beauty of that cluster of flowers.”
Well now I know what my mom meant when she said this years convention had a talk on ‘flowers’ that she thought I would of loved… Oh well at least at least they’re still talking to me. None the less, thank you I was a bit curious what she meant.
Reply
Tara says:
July 14, 2016 at 7:21 am
Sorry bit off topic but woke up this am to find that some jw’s are posting on fb the ‘Putin ban on evangelising’. As you can imagine the comments surrounding this are all to do with ‘It’s started, just like the convention said it would!’ theme. I guess hardware stores will be booming this am with JW’s buying steel doors and motion sensors in case the feds come calling. Walmart shelves will be emptied as they stock up on survival food stuffs to last for months while they hide in their bunkers….
So when I read this I laughed and said ‘Yes!’…. is that wrong?
Reply
dee2 says:
July 14, 2016 at 8:10 am
It would certainly be hilarious if the JWs started to react in this way Tara.
According to the GB, God will put it into the heart of the UN to destroy Babylon The Great/”false religion” FIRST. The JWs will be attacked LAST:
Watchtower of 9/15, 2012, pg.3-7:
“How This World Will Come to an End”.
It seems God has changed the script. Now the JWs will be attacked FIRST……………..
Reply
Chiafade says:
July 14, 2016 at 12:43 pm
That’s funny for so many different reasons. The first thing they most blatantly ignore is the fact that they aren’t the only ones being banned. Of course if they focused on that inconvenient truth it would take away from their persecution complex and their feelings of special status with God.
Reply
Paranoid Android says:
July 14, 2016 at 7:23 am
I’ve just sent my brother a letter to try and see if I can prompt his critical thinking skills into action.
He is shunning most of his family now, including his daughter, after advising her that there would be more comfort in her being dead, then in her current position as disfellowshipped.
I’ve used various sites and information sources (including this one, thanks Lloyd) to put something pretty conclusive together regarding the Society’s complete lack of direction from God.
There is so much proof available.
Regarding disfellowshipping, it quite clearly states in an AWAKE of 1947, that the Society, directed by holy spirit of course, believed excommunication to be pagan in origin, and that it was not supported by any bible teaching.
It condemns the Catholic Church for practicing it, calling it a ‘weapon’ used to attain ‘ecclesiastical power’.
Then… 5 years later… in 1952, the society changed its mind and said….
‘Actually…. we think excommunicating people is awesome, and God totally wants us to do it’.
Some time later in 1974, they relaxed the rules a bit and said if a disfellowshipped person was living a decent lifestyle, even if they hadn’t been reinstated, witnesses shouldn’t feel the need to shun them anymore….
However, just when relationships had been mended and people were happy again, in 1981 the Society changed the rule back to strict lifetime of shunning for all disfellowshipped ones.
Check out this link for the full breakdown, it’s a real eye opener.
http://www.jwfacts.com/watchtower/disfellowship-shunning.php
Reply
dee2 says:
July 14, 2016 at 7:43 am
Ex-GB member Ray Franz’s follow up book: IN SEARCH OF CHRISTIAN FREEDOM, also has a detailed discussion about shunning and disfellowshipping.
Reply
FullyAwake says:
July 14, 2016 at 7:40 am
Lately the GB has had an axe to grind with music and music careers. First with Sergei and the violin at the regional conventions and then this week the video “Choosing a career with an eternal future” was played during the mid-week meetings. They are going to great lengths to get teenagers to choose pioneering and shelving any dreams that they have. The video depicted a young man going to guitar class and his students and teachers encouraging him to pursue what he wants. Then the scene shows him performing a pop song in front of a large audience and judges that looked like copy cat American Idol judges. Now, realistically, how many really get an opportunity to make it successfully into the top picks of such competitions as the video depicted?
These videos are really trying to narrow down the life of JW’s. I mean that in the sense that the fully indoctrinated R&F will do anything that the GB tells them or now shows them what to do and are judging others who don’t follow through on their instructions. Really, what is wrong with being a concert violinist or pianist? What is wrong with singing and making other people’s lives feel good and happy with their talents? They are demonizing everything they can out there. I really liked the comment made in an earlier post from a comedic movie that said “Everything is the DEVIL to you Mama!” because that is what it amounts to with this religion.
Reply
Peggy says:
July 14, 2016 at 8:34 am
FullyAwake,
can I get that video online? I had these friends in the cong. who have kids that play drums and guitar. Got paid gigs and all. What will they do?
Reply
FullyAwake says:
July 14, 2016 at 10:46 am
The video can been found in the JW app under publications, videos, teenagers.
They do have the young man teaching guitar at the end of the video so that he can support his pioneer ministry. Nothing is shown about performance other than the desire to become some pop star. But, the message of the video is pretty loud and clear.
I just personally feel that people need to make their own decisions on what they want to do with their lives without undue influence. I view the mid-week meetings and videos like this as sale pitches to get people to work for them. Pioneering or preaching for that matter is not for everyone. Some people love it, many others don’t like it. Even the scriptures say that “some” will be evangelizers and others teachers, etc. so even the scriptures acknowledge it is not for everyone neither everyone has the ability to do it well or the desire to do it.
Reply
Bad Penny says:
July 15, 2016 at 4:41 pm
It wasn’t long ago that the Society were ‘singing the praises’ of all the talented musicians who contributed to the new song book recordings. Were they JWs or did they pay professional musicians to play for them? Whatever, music is ‘a gift from God’.
There are many young ones within the org. who, given the encouragement, could become very accomplished musicians. How sad that they are discouraged from using their talents in order to spend their precious young lives chasing ‘spiritual’ goals. Preaching the lie that the Kingdom of God is already here!
Reply
Vivian says:
July 14, 2016 at 9:48 am
Every year during the conventions the guys up there in NY have an opportunity to change and better the group by chilling out and relaxing some of the bad ugly policies. They could simply maintain the goofy paradise on earth and mass resurrection belief and hold enough religious uniqueness to secure a following. Get rid of the general strictness and unnecessary day to day limitations set upon members lifestyles.
Reply
Big B says:
July 14, 2016 at 11:44 am
@ Vivian:
What?!
Give up the authority and mind control of approximately 8 million people?
How would they (sheeple) survive without the wise, spirit begotten, ‘faithful and discrete slave’ class (Governing Body) telling/reminding the flock (rank & file) how to live their lives every waking second?
Without the endless Pharisaic rules and regulations, from the Governing Body, the flock would be hopelessly lost, aimless, a ship without a rudder and a life without purpose in the fields or stormy seas of Satan’s world.
Yes, the sheep must serve Watchtower….(oops) Jehovah wholeheartedly without reservation or second thoughts to be saved from _________(fill in the blank, “Satan’s machinations”, “Armageddon”, etc.) in order to_______________ (fill in the blank, “live forever on paradise earth”, “see your loved ones again in the resurrection”, etc.)
I agree with you Vivian, you are absolutely correct. However, the chances of that happening are astronomically small as my tongue and cheek comments are meant to reflect. 🙂
Reply
rob says:
July 14, 2016 at 10:22 am
I believe that the powers that be within this religion will never loosen the rules and adopt a more mainstream approach, as this would mean that the witnesses would appear to be just like everyone else.
They want the rank and file to think that they are martyrs and that they are different from worldy people and that they are united in not celebrating holidays, not taking blood, shunning, knocking on not at home doors, etc.
The problem is that many people, just like myself, have seen the many problems associated with the man made rules and how they do not correlate with the Bible and the example set by Jesus.
It appears that the powers the be within this religion are just too arrogant and are relishing in the power that they think that they hold over 8 million or so people, and they are enjoying their cushy lifestyle which is funded by the rank and file. What they do not see is the dissention which is occurring right under their noses within the rank and file.
I believe that tyrants only have a limited shelf life and that shelf life will one day come to its expiry date for this religion.
Reply
Winston Smith says:
July 15, 2016 at 6:43 am
I agree with your assessment, and it may be that the group is reaching a plateau in membership. Sadly, there will always be people want to be told what to do, what to think, etc., by some group of holy men. However, based on the growth slowing to just barely keeping up with the population increase, the religion may be at a point where it can no longer attract and maintain enough members with its current set of values and rules. So then the leaders have two choices: dig in and settle for no further growth (which seems to be where they are headed) or ease up and become more mainstream in order to continue to grow. The next couple decades will be very interesting for this group.
WS
Reply
Big B says:
July 15, 2016 at 10:05 am
@ Winston Smith:
They have no choice in going ‘mainstream’. That would mean lightening up on Holiday celebrations, birthdays, etc. like mainstream Christian religions.
J.W.’s will be a fringe group long before the next couple of decades pass by as no one pays much attention to them now. Just my observation.
Reply
Winston Smith says:
July 15, 2016 at 9:53 pm
It certainly seems to be where they are headed. Going mainstream would be a real 180. But you never know – The Worldwide Church of God did just that.
WS
Reply
No Body says:
July 14, 2016 at 10:34 am
That’s why WT’s directed that the ministry change from “Hi. Have you ever wondered, etc.” to “Stand there until your shift is over or until trouble starts in which case just pack up and leave.” Invite the “worldly people” to take an interest in any of THESE publications or THIS website or THIS application of a Bible verse. But think about how arrogant and intellectually cowardly it is to say, ‘We’re not here to learn from YOU. We’re here to teach those willing to learn from US and if that’s not you then we’re not really interested in talking’? What kind of person will someone who looks at the world that way eventually become? Is being part of the least culpable religious group you can find more important than, as an individual, being able to say that you’ve established a track record of hearing all sides and changing your course accordingly?? Are there not still more questions worth asking? Is Jehovah going to destroy people who’ve had the courage to investigate where powerful men have told them not to? Has it ever worked out when people followed powerful men and not their own God given power of reason employed in the analysis of indisputable fact; facts that may not have been available prior or even deliberately kept from them?
Reply
Bad Penny says:
July 15, 2016 at 3:47 am
Like your comments No Body –
‘Using our own God given power of reason employed in the analysis of indisputable fact, etc.’ It amazes me to think that that is exactly what I thought I was doing for thirty years in the org., not of course having the real facts available as you say, they had been deliberately kept from us.
Reply
Winston Smith says:
July 15, 2016 at 6:53 am
It is somewhat news to me that the message has so significantly changed since I started fading almost 4 years ago. That is really something if it has changed to that extent. Part of what helped me wake up was the interchange of thoughts and ideas that I actually enjoyed having with those I met in the door-to-door work. I was of a mind that if this was the truth it ought to stand up to any inquiry or alternate reasoning. My assessment was correct. However since it was NOT the truth it failed to stand up to such scrutiny. Thus a well built experiment that exposed a faulty hypothesis.
WS
Reply
Twmack says:
July 14, 2016 at 11:55 am
“Choosing a career with an eternal future” is a line
they were handing youngsters decades ago.
WT 1969 March 15, p171 described school counsellors
who were encouraging higher education , as. —
“Brainwashing students wth Satan’s propaganda” /
( Jaw just dropped in disbelief )
AW, of that same year in May 22 issue p 15 said. “As a young
person you will never fulfil any career that this system has to offer”.
Youngsters of, say, 17 or 18 at the time will now be at retiring age.
Ones who were taken in by that pitch will likely now be
dependent on those, “Who chose to take up a career”.
My grand daughter ( Un-baptised ) wants to be a dancer but her
brainwashed father is against it. It’s sheer cruelty to crush
a young persons desires and substitute them for a life time of
door knocking. I’m sad for the children and I’m angry at
these Life Robbers.
Reply
FullyAwake says:
July 14, 2016 at 12:54 pm
This is true. The video presentations have a much deeper impact on peoples emotions and attitudes. The indoctrination is getting much deeper by the use of these videos. In the end these videos will prove to be much more harmful than the printed page than anyone may realize. These videos are showing me with eyes wide open just how controlling the organization really wants to be towards its adherents.
Keep watching….
Reply
Winston Smith says:
July 15, 2016 at 7:00 am
Here’s an interesting thought: Do you think Jesus would have needed to make use of such videos if the technology was available in his time period? It seems his words were sufficient to gain a following. Had he used videos then the scripture might read: In the beginning was the Video and the Video was with God and the Video was God. (Oops I forgot the indefinite article -LOL)
WS
Reply
Big B says:
July 15, 2016 at 1:21 pm
@ Winston Smith,
“Do you think Jesus would have needed to make use of such videos if the technology was available in his time period?”
Not as long as he could feed the multitudes from a couple of loaves and a few fishes or raise the dead or heal the sick or walk on stormy seas, then calm those seas with a word.
Which do you think would have the greater impact on your audience, a slick video or the miracles he is said to have performed?
This is why Christianity bothers me. Wouldn’t it have been easier to find the “TRUTH” and those that possess it if God had allowed the gifts of Pentecost to be passed on until the second coming?
Personally speaking, I don’t believe he (Christ) had an invisible second coming (presence) in 1914.
Instead we have to rely on imperfect human interpretation and ‘faith’. Really? How’s that working for all of us?
Reply
Winston Smith says:
July 15, 2016 at 10:01 pm
I recently read an interesting article that tries to make the argument that Jesus was actually a natural theologist (see http://christiandeism.com/archives/natural-religion/the-natural-religion-of-jesus/).
They feel that his teachings were that you didn’t need a priest, or a holy book, or anything. If you could get the grasp of the two greatest commandments: Love God and Love your neighbor, then you were well on the way to grasping the kingdom of God. They feel that he was only later deified by the Pauline theology as well as that of John.
I certainly agree that there was no second presence or coming at all, nor should one be looked for.
WS
Bad Penny says:
July 15, 2016 at 4:06 am
Twmack – Just another form of child abuse.
I too feel saddened for the young ones whose lives are wasted in door knocking activity. They will grow up unfulfilled and depressed.
Try to encourage the dancing if you can. What is wrong with it? You could use a scriptural reason in her defense. (Colossians 3:21 is a good one).
Reply
FadingJosie says:
July 15, 2016 at 10:09 pm
I can only imagine how it must feel for those who were taken in by all the hype around 1975 who subsequently awoke to realise that’s all it ever really was…hype. My husband’s parents were among those but despite the disappointments they are still very much “in” though most of the childen, my husband inculded, are “out”. It is one of my husband’s greatest disappointments that a) they were never encouraged to put effort into their school work (the end will be here before you even finish school) and b) higher education was very much taboo in their household.
Subsequently he has been very encouraging in terms of our children’s academic and sporting pursuits. When our son was identified by a soccer coach as having a natural ability for the game and invited to train with a local age group squad, he gave him the opportunity to do it. I, at the time, was very uncomfortable with it (no time for meetings and field service) but now that I myself have come to realise what the org is all about I am so grateful that my husband was so supportive of my son. He may not be the next Messi or Ronaldo but he has something and the life lessons he will learn during the pursuit of this dream (teamwork, discipline, effort, working towards a goals in life) will stand him in good stead for the rest of his life even if he doesn’t reach the highest level.
But when I think of how many “Sergei’s” have been denied opportunities to pursue their talents because of what the org has said about it, I find it quite tragic.
Reply
Linda Cody says:
July 14, 2016 at 8:05 pm
My JW parents robbed me of self esteme. I was raised a JW from birth. We lived in rural farm land. I was thirty and I married a worldly man. It was 1988 and there were no single brothers where I lived. After I married I became inactive. It got to where I could only stand to be around my parents one day once a month. Every time I visited my parents my parents would say, “I wish you didn’t have that job so you would do more in the truth.” “I don’t understand why you have to have such an independant spirit.” “Why didn’t you take the truth into your heart?” “Where did your mother and I go wrong?” My father said, “Maybe I should have spanked you more while you were growing up.” My father said to me, “I think your sick, sick, sick, sick, sick.” The funny thing is after my mother passed away my father couldn’t handle being single and he did exactly the same thing I did when he got married. He married who he fell in love with. Out of truth. He remained active in truth and remained very judgemental. He didn’t live around a lot of people where he lived. My dad passed away in 2008. I’m glad I returned into truth and got myself active again because I found out I couldn’t stand being around JWs because they are sacarine sweet. They know how to sell themselves as being sweet to get people to like them in order to bring people into the truth. They are hateful. I became inactive again but I feel better and happier because walking away from them is my choice. My JW family can shun me and I don’t mind because I don’t want to be apart of their way of life any more. It’s nice I returned and saw through everything now that my eyes are open. I really do feel better and happier. I feel calm. I don’t feel angry. JWsurvey helps the awakening process. My JW family does what they want and I’m no longer afraid to speak. I know I feel better than they do. I can’t be around them to much. I don’t need the stress. Without them I have less stress in my life. And this is very true.
Reply
KayGH says:
July 16, 2016 at 4:29 pm
@ Linda Cody
Well I guess you are living your life in peace not in pieces like this brother I know personally.
He lives just across the street, unfortunately he is a victim of shunning because he has been disfellowshipped and as a result is no longer an elder.
An unbaptized publisher who is my coworker attends meeting in the same kingdom hall as the brother related this incident to me that one day after the midweek meeting at about 9:45PM, he was walking home with a mature sister when they got to the main road, this former elder was stuck in the middle of the unable to move due to a mild stroke he is suffering from.
The sister told the unbaptized publisher she cannot do anything to help him because he was disfellowshipped. The unbaptized publisher was amused at her words because the brother’s wife is the best friend of the sister in question. Upon seeing a car approach he rushed to help the brother and even paid a taxi so that he could be sent home conveniently.
This is how far the indoctrination on shunning could go. Not reaching out to help when the need arises. I guess she forgot what Proverbs 3:27-30. Take care.
Reply
Harry Cadanza says:
July 14, 2016 at 8:09 pm
@Linda, I’m happy for you.
Reply
Harry Cadanza says:
July 14, 2016 at 8:09 pm
@Linda, I’m happy for you.
Reply
GEM says:
July 15, 2016 at 2:19 am
@ Linda:
Thank you for your honesty and perspicacity.
Once we see things for what they really are, the spell breaks… the weight lifts… and, the smiles return unconditionally.
May you continue to enjoy your journey on the Highway of Life. Best wishes.
Reply
Tara says:
July 15, 2016 at 6:17 am
I’m confused… actually I say that tongue in cheek. Can someone please explain this to me… daughter df’d for marrying outside of ‘truth’. An older sister marries outside of truth – huge marking talk. Elders daughter marries outside of truth…… nothing. R&F counseled on allowing children to take part in sports etc that bring them a tad of lime light….bad, bad, bad. Elders granddaughter wins beauty pageant, local news, papers…. nothing.
Reply
Winston Smith says:
July 15, 2016 at 7:13 am
Tara,
It all depends how the hierarchy is set up in a particular congregation. I have been in congregations where that would not stand and the elder would be removed. I have been others where the body would be on the fence and not take any action because they were not sure what to do. And finally the third case where a particular elder has so much clout that he can do just about anything he wants and no one questions it because he is brother so-and-so.
An interesting side point: many years ago my best friend’s older sister got engaged to a worldly man. Automatically, people in the congregation began to shun her. The presiding overseer proceeded to give a talk about how we were NOT to shun someone for marrying outside “the Lord.” Of course he was one of those more liberal elders who believed in going to college and so forth. Also this was during that period in the 90’s when the organization was easing up some of its control.
WS
Reply
Average Joe says:
July 15, 2016 at 8:18 am
That sounds like my kind of elder Winston. I still believe in God but my faith in the WTS is fading rapidly. I don’t think we should shun anybody. If someone doesn’t belong to your circle of activities then association is reduced anyway. EG. If you change jobs, over time you don’t hang around with your old workmates as much, as a general rule. They are not shunned, you just don’t have the same thing in common anymore (the job) and you certainly have the option to see them again if you wish. That is how it should be with the JWs. Those who don’t want to be part of the organisation anymore should be left in peace and certainly not hounded for their decision.
Reply
Winston Smith says:
July 15, 2016 at 10:22 pm
@AJ
The elder I described above is the same one I described to rob below. He tried so hard to help the friends in the congregation, but he was always at odds with the other elders who wanted to lord it over them. Remind you of anyone? Jesus and the Pharisees perhaps? Men who desire power over others seem to cause more misery than is imagineable.
I appreciate that at last check you were still serving, AJ, and trying to help the friends. That’s a tough position and I don’t envy you. If you think you can continue such a course and bring some sort of balance and rationality to the JWs in your congregation, then I wish you the best and hope you can do some good. If you find you do need to withdraw or step down, then that’s your decision to make and you should feel no guilt about that choice either. From your comments I can tell that you really want to help the R&F JWs. But from my personal experience, when it comes to the JW leadership: no good deed goes unpunished.
WS
Reply
Twmack says:
July 15, 2016 at 6:55 am
Bad Penny, Thanks for your empathy and suggestion.
It’s like walking a tightrope isn’t it? We want to rescue
our little grandchildren before they’re completely lost
to the cult. But we risk alienating their parents, who
are also our children whom we love. But reasoning from
the scriptures seems the best way to go about it.
Thanks again for Col,3:21.
Reply
rob says:
July 15, 2016 at 7:36 am
I remember a couple of elders who were really empathetic to the challenges faced by teenagers and had empathy for those who were single parents and these two elders did not judge me when I attended university. They appeared to be genuinely interested in people and spirituality and gave wonderful encouragement.
But unfortunately in our particular congregation there were a majority of elders who appeared to be quite power hungry, played everything by the society rule book and who ruled with an iron fist. They were in tight with the circuit overseer. In their personal lives they were pretty much nobodies, but in the congregation they obviously felt like they were somebodies and people kowtowed to them. I heard them on a few occasions make fun of the two elders, inferring that they were weak and that they were pushovers.
Guess what happened to the two elders? One stepped down and the other moved away. I asked the one who stepped down why he stepped down and he confided in me that he could not stand the politics within the elder body.
From my personal experience, this religion is not about love or understanding or empathy. It is all about appearances, judgement, pretentiousness and who appears to be the most spiritual and most of all control and power.
There are some very wonderful people who make up the rank and file but they are the silent ones.
Reply
Winston Smith says:
July 15, 2016 at 8:02 am
@rob
I totally agree with you. Yes, once in a while you would find the occasional elder who really cared about people and really tried to help them. They were like rare gems or desert roses. But by and large they eventually would either step down, be removed, or be relegated to a place of inconsequence by the remaining two types of elders: the power hungry wannabes and the organizational yes-men who followed them.
I came of age under the tutelage of one of those amazing, rare gem elders and tried to emulate him when I served (although I don’t think I did it as well as he did). I watched him be abused and berated by those other types of elders and finally end up in a position inconsequence until he died.
WS
Reply
Bad Penny says:
July 15, 2016 at 5:02 pm
Winston –
I remember one of those rare, caring, elders, (he professed to be anointed).
Some words of wisdom from him that I will never forget were, “When in doubt, always do the loving thing.” So simple, so right!
If only we could all live by it!
Reply
Winston Smith says:
July 15, 2016 at 10:09 pm
You have got it. What I find to be one of the most profound passages of scripture: Mark 12:32-34 “Then the scribe said to Him, “You are right, Teacher…love [God] with all your heart, with all your understanding, and with all your strength, and to love your neighbor as yourself…[Jesus] said to him, “You are not far from the kingdom of God.””
What basic, simple, yet profound reasoning. There is no need for anything else. No priests, no ceremonies, no manmade rules.
WS
Reply
Fooledmeonce says:
July 16, 2016 at 3:52 pm
Unfortunately, there were a few good elders, weren’t there?!?
I say unfortunately, because by having some good men around, it confused me, and others, I’m sure, about who really represented this cult; the few good ones or the majority of the stupid, power-hungry or ‘yes men’.
I believe that The Society is losing good people at a fairly steady rate so that all they will have left are the ‘bad elders’. That should make it more obvious to people like us, that the jws are nothing but a twisted cult.
Reply
Telescopium says:
July 16, 2016 at 5:02 am
Winston,
My grandfather had some kind of experience similar to the one you mention.
He was well-liked and reasonable, but at one point there was a disfellowshipped individual in the territory who needed regular transportation to the meetings, so my grandfather stepped up to help. This was met with the ire of the majority of the elder body, as the direction (at the time) was to NOT provide assistance like that. Ultimately there was a confrontation with a district overseer, at which time my grandfather stepped down or was removed and never served again.
I know he was approached about serving again in a different congregation after he moved, but he declined. The damage was done.
Just thought I’d share.
Reply
FullyAwake says:
July 16, 2016 at 9:53 am
Yes, Rules are the rule of the day with this organization. They go above helping anyone in need. Funny thing, this is exactly what Jesus condemned the Pharisees for.
Reply
VictorE says:
July 16, 2016 at 11:58 am
VictorE
The Watchtower a few years ago had this to say about elders. There are elders who have the mind of Christ and then there are elders who have the mind of elders. Whoever wrote that in the Watchtower had insight and was describing two types of elders. Unfortunately, today, most elders do not have the mind of Christ but do have the mind of elders. By their fruits you can identify them.
Do you think that this shunning policy is coming from one having the mind of Christ or one having a mind of an elder?
I know, to easy!
Escaped & Educated says:
July 30, 2016 at 1:37 pm
Lloyd, I am so glad you bit off more than you could chew! My parents are at the convention this weekend and, of course, talk excitedly about it at the end of each day. It is difficult for me to stomach their excitement so the comic relief you provide is invaluable.
Quickly about me: I am 47 years old. My mom has been a pioneer since I was four years old and married my step-father, another long-time pioneer who eventually became a circuit overseer, when I was 7. While I believe in the sincerity of my parents thinking they are helping people, the teachings and actions of the organization have outraged me since I was young. Until I left my parents’ house and “The Truth” at two weeks shy of 18 years old, I spent most meetings furiously listing all of the injustices, inconsistencies and plain nonsense I was hearing spew from the platform.
I have only one disagreement with your commentary–I don’t think this is the worst convention ever. I have been to every single one, sometimes more than once, from 1969 to 1987 and there were some real doozies! I cannot count the number of times I was at a convention when I heard something that made my jaw drop and my face search the faces of those around me, hoping to find another expression of can-you-believe-he-just-said-that-and-we’re-just-going-to-sit-here?
Truly, thank you for all of your time and effort doing this work. Are you in the US?
Reply
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← The Worst Convention Ever – Part 5: Friday
No expense spared: Governing Body members DO fly business class →
The Friday Column: Outside the bubble
Posted on July 15, 2016
6a00e554015a2e8834013485797020970cLast month marked three years since I resigned as Ministerial Servant, tossed out my neck-tie and walked away from the religion I had known virtually all my life. I exited a controlling cult but in many ways, I entered a strange new world.
An unveiled look at the world “outside the bubble” quickly brought up feelings and sentiments that I describe as “postponed”. If you’ve lost a loved one, experienced a break-up, suffered with anxiety and depression as a Jehovah’s Witness, you’ve likely been told to pray for Jehovah’s help, read the bible or seek counsel from “mature” members of the congregation.
All of the very natural emotions that stir up inside one’s mind are never truly processed. Instead, they are pushed back or “postponed”. Why even bother to address these traumas when the answer to all our problems is some future utopian paradise?
Here in the US, over the last forty-eight hours, we have seen two gruesome incidents of police brutality that have sparked politically charged conversations about race relations in this country. The peaceful protests that followed erupted in violence when eleven Police Officers were gunned down (five killed) in Dallas, Texas.
Even if one is physically removed from these tragedies, the senseless violence and loss of life naturally stir up feelings of sadness, mourning or even anger that we must process in an emotionally healthy way. However, to a Jehovah’s Witness still harnessed by their indoctrination, these senseless tragedies serve only to affirm their belief that humanity really does need that promised utopian paradise.
The feelings of sadness or anger are shuffled to the back of their minds. Any natural sense of justice is muffled as even expressing outrage over an injustice is considered a violation of a “true Christian’s” neutrality. Jehovah is the only one who could affect any real change in this world and even the thought that we puny humans can do anything to improve our condition is a most egregious lack of faith.
When we consider that those who leave the faith have likely endured this type of indoctrination for many years; it’s no wonder that many of us start out emotionally stunted when we arrive into the “strange new world”.
Learning to feel again
Birthday-Wallpaper-4One of the first things I learned was that all those “worldly people” I had dismissed as “destined for destruction” are actually mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers and friends. Just like me, they’re also pre-occupied with raising their children and providing a good life for their families. When a tragedy occurs, they feel sad, angry and depressed but they don’t have the luxury of hinging their concerns to some make believe future. They have to live in “the now”.
Sometimes those emotions spur a form of activism or protest but even if it doesn’t, at the very least, it triggers some type of introspection and self-analysis. As a Jehovah’s Witness, that kind of self-awareness is almost non-existent as any energy one could muster to take care of ourselves emotionally is quickly drained by the incessant need to put the “kingdom’s interests” before one’s own. It’s almost as if we have to learn to feel again and recognize that it’s okay to feel sad over some distant tragedy and not just the ones that affect other Jehovah’s Witnesses.
Upon leaving the cult, I lost many life-long relationships. I have been fortunate enough to make new friendships with great people who genuinely care about us. But, I have to admit that some aspects of these new social interactions were awkward at first. For example, Birthdays and all the customs associated with them are social conventions to almost everyone that isn’t a Jehovah’s Witness. Our indoctrination taught us that birthdays are merely an indulgence by selfish people with a compulsive need to be exalted by their peers.
Because I’ve never celebrated my own birthday, I feel no emotional connection or nostalgia about the custom. To many of my new friends birthdays are, in fact, a pretty big deal. Not for selfish reasons, but because it’s an opportunity to celebrate the blessings of this life. They want to celebrate mine, and expect that I’d want to share in their own celebrations. It such a normal part of their lives that it seems abnormal when I’m not as enthusiastic as they are about the custom. I used to feel like the “Sheldon” character from the American Sitcom, “The Big Bang Theory,” trying to adjust to all these social conventions that felt foreign to me.
Three years later, I’ve come to appreciate the opportunities to celebrate life with the people I care about. Although some aspects of celebrations like Christmas and Thanksgiving still seem strange to me, I really do look forward participating. I also appreciate what many of those customs mean to my friends, and I feel honored that they wish to share those experiences with me.
You have an opinion? That’s okay too
africa_politics_africaonemedia-com_Over this past year, I participated in my first political rally, and voted in my first primary election, and it felt great. For years, I was taught that political activism was pointless and I must allow my mind to be “molded by Jehovah.” What really happens when one submits to that type of control is that we forfeit our ability to think critically to the whims of the likes of Anthony Morris III, whose idea of activism involves enforcing a ridiculous dress code and encouraging children to sacrifice their lives to uphold Watchtower’s Anti-blood doctrine.
The 2016 Watchtower Convention videos have made it very clear that having an opinion that doesn’t align with the organization’s policies can prove to be harmful to any dissenters. We risk losing our family and friends, along with the stigma that comes with being labeled an “apostate.” Since being politically aware as a Jehovah’s Witness made little sense, I was reluctant about getting involved in any kind of activism as an ex-JW.
Once I left Watchtower it became clear that I was now a part of a larger community. One that was very informed about the issues. Often there’s a myriad of ideas and opinions and very little consensus, but unlike Watchtower’s high control approach, this community invites opinion and revels in debate.
It’s okay to have an opinion on government policies, religion, faith and social issues. It’s okay to think that we can affect the world we live in and strive for more opportunities and a better life. Just because we may not live long enough to see these goals realized, doesn’t mean we shouldn’t try to pursue change.
The topics of politics or religion can be divisive, and it often doesn’t make for good dinner talk, but it’s okay that you have an opinion. For all Watchtower adherents to be of “one mind” requires complete repression of our thoughts and feelings. As any mental health professional would tell you, repressing our thoughts and feelings is extremely harmful to the human psyche.
What is normal?
bubble-burstSure, there are things that still feel strange. Life inside a cult in many ways moves slower than the “outside world.” I’ve often wondered: will I ever feel normal? But what is normal really, and is there such a thing?
That might be a lot to answer with this article, but one of things I’ve learned after my fade is that no matter how similar the external factors might seem, our personal experience along with our feelings and emotions are what makes us unique individuals. Among those experiences, there exists a large space for variance. That’s why some leave the cult only to rejoin for fear of losing family, while others never look back.
Some exit the cult and choose to live a quiet life, refusing to be bothered with anything having to do with their former cult, while others pursue a life of dedicated activism in hopes of helping others awaken.
Whatever the case may be, once we’ve exited “the bubble” we need to seek out those feelings and emotions we’ve postponed. Tucked away somewhere in the back of our minds, those feelings must be processed before we can start to feel like a unique, non-group-thinking individual. Some of those feelings might be off-putting and uncomfortable. It won’t all be happy thoughts, that’s for sure. You might want to smack the smug grin off Anthony Morris’ face every time you see his image. You may be resilient enough to do it without the help of a professional counselor or therapist.
Just don’t worry so much about whether or not you’ll ever feel normal. Be happy that life outside the bubble will allow you to stretch out those emotional legs. Process those emotions and you’ll discover what it’s really like to “feel,” unencumbered by the weight of indoctrination.
“Free at last, free at last”.
A guest post by James Sequoia
Check out James’s previous article for JW Survey here: The Friday Column: Let the dead bury their dead.
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43 Responses to The Friday Column: Outside the bubble
TeraG says:
July 15, 2016 at 4:10 pm
Thank you! Excellent description of what it’s like to learn to feel again and realize it’s ok to test the waters of new things. I too voted for the first time ever, in the primary elections.
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Mitch Jensen says:
July 16, 2016 at 11:26 pm
You can still remain in the loop by picking and choosing where your going to keep up with anything Watchtower related. I like how Mr. Cedars in our to make people’s transitions less emotionally charged has chosen to avoid the Ex-JW Arkham Asylum Message Boards and Youtube Channels of Joker and Harley Quinn’s lunatic rantings of become Radicalized through their mad rantings.
Most Ex JWs and Faders do like to know what is happening in a Organization that robbed many of them of their youth and the chance at having a good college education or career due to a lie. Mr. Cedars has provided a safe resource here where ideas can be shared without profanity or someone screaming at them. Mr. Cedars is lucky to have a skill writer like yourself and we are bless to have John Cedar’s overseeing a peaceful protest against mind control.
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Idontknowhatodo says:
July 19, 2016 at 12:23 am
Reading this has enlightened me because I realise I have since waking up found more of an inner peace than I ever have had before… the knowlege that this is my life and my body and that I have the right to control it has been to say the least liberating…you have described this very well indeed.
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Kate says:
July 15, 2016 at 4:10 pm
Without the belief that all of life’s tragedies will be made right by Jehovah in the very near future, I have had to try to learn to deal with extreme sadness and depression (for example at the loss of a young life). My reaction these days to such things is so different from the witnesses I still know who put it out of their minds because it will all be okay soon.
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Oubliette says:
July 15, 2016 at 4:20 pm
James, nice personal essay. I really appreciated your experiences and observations.
There are many reasons that life after leaving a cult is difficult. For those that joined as adults, it is difficult for to reclaim or rediscover our authentic, personal identity. For those that were raised in one, we need to discover who we really are for the very first time.
As you observed, all of the normal coping skills that the average person has were kept from us while in the cult. There is a lot of personal education that an individual needs to get in order to untangle the mess of false beliefs about both the world and ourselves so we can live happy, fulfilling lives in the real world.
Two of the best bits of practical advice I can share are these:
1. Learn to have a realistic, positive worldview. Let that replace the unrealistic, extremely negative worldview that the WTBTS indoctrinated us with.
2. Develop mindfulness: instead of dwelling on past hurts in a negative way and blaming ourselves, accept that we didn’t intentionally join a high-control, authoritarian, destructive cult. Become aware of our thoughts and feelings and learn to replace negative, counter-productive ones with healthy, positive ones.
It’s difficult, but it’s worth it.
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Erik says:
July 18, 2016 at 7:16 am
Well put, thank you!
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Bad Penny says:
July 15, 2016 at 4:20 pm
So enjoyed your article James.
Many points that the majority of us can relate to.
It has been three years since my exit from the org. also. What made you wake up, you didn’t say? The July 2013 Watchtower set me on the freedom trail, was it the same for you?
I haven’t celebrated my Birthday since leaving, but my son’s workmates sent him a First Birthday card at the age of 29! Crazy isn’t it?
Looking forward to your next article.
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James Sequoia says:
July 15, 2016 at 5:06 pm
Thank you Bad Penny,
For about 8 years prior to my exit I knew it was a harmful cult but I stayed in for fear losing friends and family. My initial doubts came about while researching on the Internet, trying to actually defend the 1914 doctrine after the local congregation had a rash of “apostasy” where the presiding overseer made a hasty exit. The straw that broke the camel’s back for me was the deliberate mishandling of child abuse victims.
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Telescopium says:
July 16, 2016 at 4:05 am
Bad Penny,
My wife and I found so much wrong and contradictory in that Watchtower. The whole issue comes across as a massive power-grab by the Governing Body and a huge slap-down of everyone else.
I remember looking at the picture of the ‘wheat & the weeds’ parable, and thinking, “Where’s the great crowd?”
I mean (assuming Jehovah oversees all) there’s Jesus, Satan, anointed Christians, imitation Christians, and angels. But no great crowd. What does that mean?
I was already waking up at the time, so this didn’t really concern me, but it cemented in my mind that the great crowd really is viewed as inferior to the anointed.
Inferior in importance.
Inferior in assignment. (‘assisting the anointed’)
Inferior in hope.
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Big B says:
July 16, 2016 at 12:35 pm
@ Bad Penny & James;
Very nicely written article James.
Firstly, my fathers death, a presiding overseer occurred 16 years ago this month, I think that was the real turning point with belief in this ‘indoctrination’.
Secondly, as you said Bad Penny, the July, 2013 Watchtower study article that threw C.T. Russell and friends under the bus did much to convince me that this so called ‘spirit begotten/led’ organization was just guessing at doctrine. They (G.B.) don’t have a clue as to what may or may not be the TRUTH.
This is clearly shown in the timeline at what occurs in sequential order for Armageddon to occur. This timeline was not discussed in any of the questions during the study but shows a removal of the remaining anointed into heaven in Christendom refers to as ‘the rapture’. Most of the elders missed out on the revealing of this NEW LIGHT.
The U.N. debacle, child abuse pedophilia cover ups & payouts, were just icing on the cake for me.
Also the reading of Ray Franz’s “Crisis of Conscience” (should be required reading for anyone interested in the real history of the Watchtower) opened my eyes to the hypocrisy of this cult.
My family and I started our fade and have been out for three years. We registered to vote for the primaries in our state and will cast our vote in the national election this coming November. Celebrated Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas for the first time in my adult life as my parents stopped observing the holidays as J.W.’s in 1960.
Looking forward to the holidays with my family again this year, free of guilt and free of fear of upsetting Jehovah or the Watchtower death cult!
True Christian freedom at last.
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nullandvoidboy says:
July 16, 2016 at 1:24 pm
@ Bad Penny,
Funny but since my fade of 3 yrs, I’ve still never thought of my birthday….until my new, real friends, found out and surprised me…I was 52 going on 53 and the last birthday I had was at 9…I thought it very sweet, but inside I was kind of meh…..the JW’s really ruin these things for you….I met my first girlfriend, after my divorce and fade, and it was next to xmas….She loved xmas and knew my “story” …I was supportive but not EXCITED about the holiday…another meh moment. She used to call me Bubble Boy, lovingly, because there were so many things I hadn’t experienced yet…she was cool.
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Eric Arthur Blair says:
July 15, 2016 at 4:31 pm
Great summation James, this is so where I am at right now, adjusting to life outside the bubble – repairing the damage and recalibrating the “human psyche.” At least it’s good to feel human again!
I’ve been through some volatile emotions since I faded 12 months ago, but I’m happy to say that the one that shines through the strongest now is relief, utter relief, and a sense of freedom. This morning, Saturday, I got up and thought to myself “thank god I’m not going witnessing!” Instead of beating that tired old routine into our kids, today we are heading to the coast as a family, which we have been doing more and more – getting out, living life and exploring the world outside the bubble.
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alex williams says:
July 15, 2016 at 4:45 pm
I really enjoyed your experience. We both are going through the same feelings. Though not “born in.” My exit has been difficult and trying. For the first time, I supported a candidate during the primary, shared Thanksgiving meals with another family, and opened gifts on Christmas with others. It’s a tough adjustment. I lost my parents and 2 young adult kids to this cult. Thank you so much for writing this article. I’m not alone 🙂
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Imacountrygirl says:
July 15, 2016 at 4:48 pm
James, What a great article!
I am now a registered voter myself and I actually feel proud of it. It has been exciting for me to learn about the politics of my country and our world.
There is still so much I haven’t learned yet, because previously, there was “no point”, but that’s OK. I find that I care very much about many things that in the past I glossed over.
It’s a boost to confidence when you are aware of the world around us and are able to discuss various issues intelligently.
I feel so much more connected to life. It’s empowering to know that I, though only one, can make a difference.
“Free at last, free at last”.
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Jeffreycanning says:
July 15, 2016 at 5:36 pm
Nice one James… I have lost family but part of the cost of freedom. Now with my limited resources, limited brain power I try to help others think critically. I have had relatives ‘unfriend’ me on facebook. Told me to shut the f#*k up, suggest I move on ,but I won’t… Too important is helping other poor suckers…
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Telescopium says:
July 16, 2016 at 4:13 am
Jeff,
Those you help will thank you! Everyone telling you to ‘move on’ doesn’t understand how much help is needed to break the spell.
I agree with you. Help the poor suckers!
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Tara says:
July 15, 2016 at 5:42 pm
I must admit to still looking over my shoulder to make sure I’m not being watched but then I find myself laughing at myself. Really, in the big picture what can they do to me? I know many, many are in the horrid position of loosing family because of the cult but we, ourselves are free. When I find myself in a store I will now walk down the aisle with the Christmas decorations, the St Patrick’s day stuff, the Halloween stuff… lol it’s fun, try it. Of course, I will admit to being a little afraid of being cornered by a JW and given ‘that’ look but that is all it is! It cannot physically hurt you. Sure it may be uncomfortable and you do wonder if they are going to run straight out to the car and call the elders but what can they do! Seriously! what is the worst they can do! So and so is no longer one of Jehovah’s Witnesses! well whoop de do! Put it in writing for me and I’ll stick it on fb lol. Freedom is a wonderful thing but it does take time to learn to be free within ourselves.
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Chad Willis says:
July 15, 2016 at 6:26 pm
I woke up about 2010 left in 2015 and just this week got DFed for voting in the November primary. I would not meet with the elders so I’m sure they considered that dissacossation. I fell no regrets whatsoever in fact I fell liberated. I posted my departure and the reason for it on my Facebook page for all my witness and non witness friends and relatives to see. I have already received comments of disbelief all from nonwitnesses please feel free to friend me, Chad Willis.
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JBob says:
July 16, 2016 at 12:48 am
A bit confused how the primary voting crucified you, or did you post that life event to your Facebook page?
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Winston Smith says:
July 16, 2016 at 6:01 am
@Chad,
Your elders obviously had not kept up with the “new light.” Per the November 1999 Watchtower questions from readers (pg 28-29) voting is a conscience matter.
In part it states: “However, there appears to be no principle against the practice of voting itself…As to whether they will personally vote for someone running in an election, each one of Jehovah’s Witnesses makes a decision based on his Bible-trained conscience and an understanding of his responsibility to God and to the State…If someone decides to go to the polling booth, that is his decision. What he does in the polling booth is between him and his Creator.”
I realize that to have tried to go and argue this with them, you would have had to go meet with them and this would have be challenging and may have opened up a host of other issues. But I think that everyone on this site should be aware of the official stance on this matter. What a bunch of hypocrites (your elders) for not following their own rules or even doing the needed research to handle a judicial matter.
WS
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Songbird says:
July 16, 2016 at 8:49 am
Well, apparently newer ‘new light’ re-states the old ‘light’ on this issue. On May 12, 2014 under the heading “Why Do Jehovah’s Witnesses Maintain Political Neutrality?” JW.org made the following statement.
“Jehovah’s Witnesses remain politically neutral for religious reasons, based on what the Bible teaches. We do not lobby, vote for political parties or candidates, run for government office, or participate in any action to change governments. We believe that the Bible gives solid reasons for following this course.”
https://www.jw.org/en/jehovahs-witnesses/faq/political-neutrality/#?insight%5Bsearch_id%5D=96e8c1ba-e105-463e-8d2f-555e43a3566c&insight%5Bsearch_result_index%5D=3
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Winston Smith says:
July 16, 2016 at 9:56 am
They are certainly unclear in that they keep giving opposing opinions on it. The 2014 reference appears to be a blanket statement, much like similar statements made throughout their history. In this same reference that you linked, they also state: “We also respect the rights of others to make their own decisions in political matters. For example, we do not disrupt elections or interfere with those who choose to vote.”
Even in the 1999 article, they certainly portray voting in a negative light. Recalling what was going on for the org in the late 1990’s – they were trying to get legal recognition in several Eastern European countries – and the blood issue and voting were the #1 and #2 items holding this process up. This appears to be what prompted them to make such statements and relegate certain matters (blood fractions, voting) to matters of conscience. I would still argue that based on that second statement in the article that you referenced, the 1999 stand could be argued to still be in effect. Either way, I doubt it would have helped Chad in his situation with them.
WS
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Winston Smith says:
July 16, 2016 at 11:14 am
In reflecting on this constant flip flopping of rules and regs, a couple thoughts came to mind:
1.) When I was an elder, we were constantly being told to change our procedures back and forth. One CO would come and tell us to do something one way and the next would tell us to do the opposite. On one occasion I remember calling the branch for direction on a special situation and getting told to handle a certain way and then, after it was handled, receiving a scolding for having not handled it right. It was frustrating.
2.) You certainly must allow for individuals’ opinions coming into play. There is little in the way of checks and balances in the overall hierarchy, so strongly opinionated persons can turn their personal views into “law” while they are in power. For instance, we ask one branch member how to handle something and tell you their way; you ask another and get told a completely different way. I think this one reason you see articles in the Watchtower and on jw.org that contradict others. It’s not all “new light.” Often it’s a combination of someone’s opinion and poor journalism.
3.) But could it be something more insidious? Could it be that the Borg intentionally keep changing rules to keep the, what I refer to using the the Orwellian term, “outer party” (your non bethel elders and MS’s) in line? Thus they are trained to be organizational yes-men and to never develop a will of their own, through constantly having to relearn what they already thought they knew. Reminds me of the scriptural phrase: “always learning, but never coming to a knowledge of the truth.” Why? Because truth, as defined by the “inner party” (the branches and HQ) keeps changing.
Just some thoughts.
WS
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SIRIUS says:
July 16, 2016 at 10:44 am
@Winston Smith
Perhaps on a much larger scale, since the JWs have a concept of being true and better (owning truth & superiority) it’s odd they can’t govern over others like in a government of today. You’d think it would be a natural, they have the traits… right? I’d love to see a JW run for office and throw NWT passages on Billboards at worldly people.
BTW, are GB members voted in?
IMHO
dogstar
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Winston Smith says:
July 16, 2016 at 10:49 am
New GB members are voted in by the current GB members.
WS
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Searcher says:
July 18, 2016 at 9:50 am
That is why the Watchtower organization that is the led by the GB is an ‘oligarchy’. The privileged few, selected by the few, to rule over the masses.
Pj Wilcox says:
July 15, 2016 at 9:48 pm
Very well written and thought out. I should like to meet you some day and laugh a bit about how JWs have no clue what it means to have a loving family. My family may be a bit distinctional but it’s all we got.
Bit of humor to conclude
My definition of normal is merely a setting on a “DRYER”
I so appreciate your profound wisdom
Pj Wilcoxhttp://www.unsealedbooks.com
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Telescopium says:
July 16, 2016 at 4:33 am
James,
Truly appreciated your experience.
You mention social interactions being awkward at first. This resonated with me because I spent most of 2015 in a socially self-destructive state, not knowing who I really was or what I liked or disliked. It took a total re-evaluation of my life to figure out who I am.
Your article indicates you’re happy now, living your life to the full. That’s great evidence of a successful life after leaving the Organization. Thank you for providing that.
I wish you all the best.
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JR says:
July 16, 2016 at 5:34 am
I couldn’t have said it better myself. The emotional destruction is the part that has been the hardest to learn to fix but leaving this cult 15 years ago was the best thing I ever did…but I still find the holidays hard to make that emotional connection.
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Twmack says:
July 16, 2016 at 6:56 am
Thanks James, “Starting to feel again” is a good
expression. I too now vote in local and general
elections. After having my democratic rights
suppressed for many years, it gives me a great
feeling of freedom when I drop my paper in that
ballot box. I’m a normal citizen in a free country.
It’s very much like the Berlin Wall coming down
after nearly 30 years. What rejoicing there was,
especially by those who had been on the totalitarian
E, German side.
Now they could embrace and mix again freely with
others from their own country, free from the threat
of being killed by patrolling guards.
Incessant indoctrination, religious or otherwise,
creates a barrier that’s harder to break through than
a 12ft, wall. It took me nearly 30 years to clear my
mind of WT, propaganda, it’s an easier task today.
Information is the key, it’s what all controlling regimes
fear. WT, needs to censor us to maintain their control,
if we allow it we’ll never be free. We will always be on
the wrong side of that wall.
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David Brand says:
July 16, 2016 at 8:22 am
Thank you James, a well written article and a perspective a vast multitude of us understand full well. I am glad to see you are using your own name (at least I believe you are!). More than a few ex-Witnesses are afraid to use their own name on these sites for fear of losing what little contact they may still have with family members still active in the organization. The idea of celebrating birthdays still drags on me like a heavy yoke around my neck. Being taught from an early age that birthdays were a selfish celebration, I’ve never learned to fully let go and enjoy mine. Funny enough, I turned 50 last week and found it difficult to enjoy the occasion, 30 years after I left the Witnesses!! I shared an article about my thoughts on “celebrating life” in this manner on https://separatedfromtheflock.wordpress.com. Take a look if you’re interested to see my take on birthdays and other matters related to being one of Jehovah’s Witnesses.
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debian70 says:
July 16, 2016 at 12:10 pm
Hi. There are several reasons not necessarily linked with the Jehovah’s Witness organisation why some decide to use a nickname… Perhaps it has something to do with job requirements or other sensible activities 😉
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Separated From The Flock says:
July 19, 2016 at 7:29 pm
Agreed, and maybe personal privacy concerns…Thanks for helping me get “new light” on this! 😉
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Quendi says:
July 16, 2016 at 11:45 am
James,
Thanks so much for sharing. When I was disfellowshipped, my experience was quite different from that of most Witnesses. All the years I was in the cult, I had never turned my back on either my relatives or friendships I had before my baptism. Afterwards I continued to cultivate real friendships with “worldly” people. Thus, when I was put out, I had a great safety net to catch me. I was aided, assisted and loved by people the Watchtower had constantly disparaged. So when I turned to these friends and family for help, they gladly and lovingly assisted me. Otherwise, I would have lived on the streets and suffered all kinds of harm.
The angry silence I met when I pointed out the actions of these “worldlings” in contrast to the complete neglect and abandonment I got from the elders was priceless. Though disfellowshipped, the elders told me I was still one of Jehovah’s sheep. When I asked them why they had abandoned me to the wolves, bears and lions outside the organization, I got no answer. I subsequently ceased any and all efforts to return and am all the better for it.
Your story will help and inspire many others. Keep spreading the word. This cult is not worth the time and effort it demands from its members and the sooner they realize it the better off they will be. I am very glad that you have got hold of the real life, not the horrible fake one the Watchtower has imposed on its followers. Keep up the good work.
Quendi
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debian70 says:
July 16, 2016 at 12:03 pm
Beautiful essay. I got my freedom in 2006 after spending nearly 20 years at Bethel and I discovered a brand ‘new world’. The real new world made of normal people like myself. No drug addicted, no fornicators, no liars, no blasphemous people… just normal people who loved their families, had a job, showed feelings, passions and so on. I started almost immediately to be part of this new world. I voted several times and I felt proudly part of a community. I proudly voted at the Scottish independence referendum and more recently for Brexit. I celebrate birthdays and Christmas. Only Easter does not make real sense to me. I now have a family who loves me deeply.
However, just at the beginning though I felt a bit awkward thinking that all disfellowshipped people were living a pretty miserable grey life full of sadness, painful remorse etc but I wasn’t. So I thought: “Well I must be me very evil!”. Fortunately I met this community online and I discovered another “new world” full of real happy disfellowshipped/disassociated open minded people. What else one could possibly ask?
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Jill Hileman says:
July 16, 2016 at 5:17 pm
And it’s more than ok if you could benefit, even need, the support of a therapist to guide you through the jungle of emotions and life changes too. You’re resilient because you made it. 🙂
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Michael Scalf says:
July 17, 2016 at 6:48 am
48 years in. Was an elder at one point. Now 3 1/2 years out and really enjoying life. I like so many others had doubts but put them off as wrong thoughts. Then one day a woman at work asked me to come to her church. Don’t know why I accepted the invite but I did and it has changed my life forever. I found out that all the things I was taught were indeed wrong and that God is not mean or cruel and demanding but truly loving and forgiving. Best part is that woman who invited me to church is now my wife. God is truly good and the real truth about him does set one free as Jesus said it would.
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James Broughton says:
July 18, 2016 at 9:53 am
The Watchtower Society speaks much of the New World “just round the corner”. Thank you James for reminding us that the new world-wide community of freed people is here and now.
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CaptainmyCaptain says:
July 18, 2016 at 11:26 am
I faded a while ago, and then got back into it because of where I lived and the small town and at the suggestion of my parents. I then left 3 years ago when I moved to a larger city and I have been faded since 2012. I kept telling my family that I was going to meetings, but I wasn’t. I was much happier enjoying my weekends doing what I wanted to be doing and not knocking on peoples doors at 930 in the morning and disturbing them if they were sleeping in or enjoying their breakfast together as a family. Since then my family has figured out that I haven’t been to a meeting in years. While I still have contact with them it’s very superficial at best. I still struggle with my feelings and thoughts. I only attended the the convention this past summer to please my parents. That was the wrong thing to do. The Society knows how to really tug at your emotions and they way they portray life in the “new order”. I have lost someone very close in death and it was the hardest thing I have ever dealt with. And the society really rips at your heart strings with the video portrayals. They know that everyone has been impacted by death in one way or another. However when you really start asking questions and analyzing things in great detail, you realize that this is just a giant corporation, and they are a lot of other church groups out there that were created during the “enlightenment” period in the late 1800’s. Raymond Franz’s book was eye opening to say the least. I never thought that I would be 36 years old. When my siblings were this age I thought that was old and that I would never have to experience getting older. Well 18 years later I’m still here, but my life is just a little different. I’ve realized that I’ve lost out on 36 years of my life…..living in fear. I can relate to the writer wholeheartedly. I’ve lost or ended a lot of good relationships because of the fear that I have of dating someone of the “world”. I haven’t fallen into drugs or debauchery. I even went to college and got a degree, and I’m so glad I did because I don’t know where I would be now if I had followed the guidance of the society. At the time I decided to go to school, I’m sure my parents were brow beaten because they gave me that choice to do whatever I wanted. I made the right decision. I will never lose my degree or my education and it made me a well rounded individual. I have so many emotions reading this article. Do I still feel like a failure at times…..yes I do because I have a superficial relationship with my family, but it is what it is. But if you are faded DO NOT ATTEND the convention. It will mess with your head like you have never been messed with before. And really make you question what you are doing. I wish I had never gone. The society knows what they are doing. Thank you for this article. I can certainly relate and I’m sure so many others can too.
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Tara says:
July 18, 2016 at 5:14 pm
Had the best conversation via messenger today. MC asked after me… I posted a big smiley face over some comment. he remarked on it and I said that’s because I am happy. He said he was glad I was but also not. Basically he eluded to the fact that I cannot truly be happy because I no longer attend the meetings. I basically told him that I was happy because I had found the God of my youth again. I told him I pray and have faith that my God loves and cares for me. He told me more was needed than just that. I asked him what more could be needed than my love for God and his son and their love for me? He told me he wanted to help me. I told him I didn’t need any help I was doing great. He just didn’t get it that I wasn’t pining after the meetings and the org. So I said I can’t miss something that my conscience will not allow me to condone… I mentioned that I will not talk about it with him because the study article last year said we should not talk about things, even if we know it is true because it’s not loving. I let nothing slip but gave him plenty to think on. I actually felt a little proud of myself for not caving. Happy drive to work 🙂
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Sharon Christensen says:
July 22, 2016 at 6:11 pm
Such a good article! Still going thru many emotions because of JW orgy control after many yrs…but perhaps one day…When I have “my times” usually brought on by my mother, still a fullfledged WT…My dear daughter, who I vowed the day I had her …that she would be a free spirit, never to live a controlled life dictated to as to how to live by some imperfect man, claiming to have God given backing to do so…She looks at me and says…Mom, a boat can only be sunk, if water gets into it…do not let their muddy water sink your boat…Still a float…:). although after a chewin match from my mother I have to bail quite a bit!!!!! Never going back! Nothing there! And yes…would like to slap all of them in the face for their disgusting fakery and falsehood…and kick their…hiney’s past their ears…but oh wait…my tight pants will not allow me to lift my leg that high! :))). PS…2016 Regional Conventional….leave your brains at door near the table that says…interact and credit cards accepted here! One more thing…here in Manitoba, Canada….Convention in full swing at Portage La Praire…HOT AND STINKIN HUMID!!!! Hope there is air conditioning…if not the Dear Bros. will be sweating like chickens in the barn with only fans blowing!!!! Not a good smell…but fitting for the JWorgy! Ever see a chicken…in heat! ? :)).
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Governing body says:
July 22, 2016 at 10:24 pm
The only time you are allowed as a JW to express your angry, frustration and literally go on a peaceful protest , is when Caesar demands JW to pay taxes.
Look at what we did in France.
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FullyAwake says:
July 23, 2016 at 11:33 am
I really appreciated the following statement in your article:
“One of the first things I learned was that all those “worldly people” I had dismissed as “destined for destruction” are actually mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers and friends. Just like me, they’re also pre-occupied with raising their children and providing a good life for their families.”
Individual witnesses actually believe that anyone outside the organization is destined for destruction if they don’t become witnesses even if the person is good and sincere. Their organization teaches them this. Don’t you think that this is highly judgmental? The scriptures warn us about being judgmental in several places for any reason. The Witnesses judge the entire world!
The behavior of the witnesses reflects that of a cult. The witnesses will deny that they are in a cult, but in reality they are. They say we don’t follow one man, but the governing body is a group of men. It doesn’t matter, they are still following imperfect men and allowing them to shape everything they do and don’t do in life.
EXAMPLES PROVING THAT THEY ARE A CULT:
I heard one witness say that his brother better get back to meetings regularly before it is too late. He was insinuating that he will lose his life if he doesn’t attend meetings. The organization teaches this but the scriptures do not.
It is amazing to me how witnesses view outsiders. Most witnesses will not allow their children to associate with anyone from school. All of their children’s associates must be witnesses in the congregation.
Another example in 2009/2010 on two separate occasions the district and circuit assemblies strongly discouraged the use of Facebook by any witness and were encouraged to close their Facebook accounts. Sure enough, a flood of witnesses closed their Facebook accounts all because of what a “MAN” or “MEN” said they should or shouldn’t do. Most of them re-opened their Facebook accounts once some time had past by. Why? Because there is nothing in the scriptures that state that there is anything wrong with it.
These examples show how ludicrous this whole thing is and further proves that they are actually a cult following men.
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